Yesterday when my FWA was getting ready to go to lunch, she started ranting to me about her boyfriend's mother. And one of the things she said was that she (his mother) is bipolar and lies a lot and that bipolars are known for lying. I should have stopped her right then and there and said 1) I don't care about your little fucking drama and 2) I guess you would know about lying, considering you're one of the biggest liars I have ever met in my life. And I don't even think she lies so much because she is an evil rotten bitch who likes to manipulate people- I think she lies because she is stupid and because she is so desperate to come off as likable and have people like her. Yes, because lying is really the way to go about doing that.
I just have to laugh at some of the things she complains about her boyfriend's mother, because what she doesn't realize (self-awareness is clearly not her forte) is how much they are alike in personality. That was very apparent at her baby shower.
We have this middle-aged woman at our place who started about a month ago and she is already on all of our last nerves. For one, she is one of those ones who came in acting like she knows everything. She demanded a new desk chair, because she can't work in one with arms. It still hasn't come in so she bitches nonstop about it. We were almost out of paper last week because for some reason our supply order hadn't come in yet, so she was bitching and saying we should order more paper when we put our order in and/or order more times a month. And she kept bitching about it despite us telling her multiple times that this is the maximum of what we're allowed to order and we can't order more than once a month. She butts into everyone's conversation and makes it about herself (sound like someone else we know?). Oh and she is extremely opinionated. Worse than me and unlike me, she doesn't keep her opinions to herself in front of people.
She also has to bitch every time Hozier's "Take Me To Church" comes on, which as you are aware from my complaints plays constantly. Bitch, we're all tired of it we don't need to hear you bitch about how tired you are of it every single damn time it comes on. Yesterday she made some comment that he is one of those people you should never hear from again. I turned to her and not so nicely said "why?" and she gave some dumbass excuse (I don't even care to remember what it was) and whatever it was I said "that doesn't mean he doesn't have good music. And they have played other stuff by him on the station that was good, just not as often as this [Take Me To Church]." Whether "Take" is overplayed or not, you can't deny that Hozier is talented as hell. Bitch, you're a fucking Linkin Park fan, you need to take several seats.
God save her ass if she ever badmouths MGMT in front of me.
Also, she does this annoying laugh that sounds like she is hocking a loogie. It's so gross.
And going back to my FWA and self-awareness, she complained to me one day about the new lady butting into people's conversation. I wanted to laugh hysterically and say to her damn, you really are fucking delusional, aren't you? Everything she bitches about other people she is completely oblivious to the fact THAT SHE DOES THE SAME EXACT THING.
I have ABC Family on and all of the commercials for their drama shows are getting on my last nerve with their dramatic whiny music. But these songs aren't nearly as bad as this song that is played in a commercial for FYI's Married At First Sight: The First Year (I think). Some whiny ass monotonous hipster crap about not having money but they have love and that pays the bills! If there are people out there that honestly believe that, they should be punched in the face.
I have slept better the past few nights. Didn't wake up to any feeling warm or even the start of feeling warm last night. Now watch- tonight I will.
My mood the past few days has been like a roller-coaster. I am fine one minute and then I just completely fly off the handle over the littlest thing. I don't know if it's PMS or stress or both. I am kind of thinking part of it is PMS, because my boobs hurt incredibly bad. I was trying to wash them earlier in the shower and could barely touch them. Of course, I am stressing it will come past 35 days, or not at all. I wish it would come earlier, but I would never be that lucky probably.
Have I ever mentioned how tired of this I am? Or how tired I am of being tired of this?
Also- I was on that Tartlr page earlier and she had reblogged a picture that someone had scanned from MGMT's Funzone Fanzine. There's a fanclub magazine? I am a member of their fanclub! Why haven't I gotten a copy of this yet? *shakes monitor* WHERE'S MAH MAGAZINE?!
Showing posts with label Commercials. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Commercials. Show all posts
Saturday, January 10, 2015
Sunday, January 4, 2015
Random Thoughts
I am still listening to Christmas music. I am a sad piece of work.
The past 3 mornings I have woken up feeling warm. This morning was the worst. And when I finally got out of bed several hours later, I exercised as usual and I was pretty sweaty. Stayed feeling kind of warm, yet chilled for a few hours. And then I felt really chilled the rest of the day. I wish I could explain the feeling warm yet chilled feeling. It's really difficult to explain, though, except to look at this way- when you're hot, you might take layers off or put a fan on or go outside into the cold weather. But I don't want to do that, because I am feeling chilled at the same. Ugh, that's still not a good way to explain it. All I know is I feel like my body temperature regulation is completely out of whack and can't seem to keep me comfortable.
Earlier I decided to take a look down below at things (why, I don't know) and it was that dark red almost purplish color on the inner part and really white on the outer part. I don't understand why in the second half of my cycle, my vaginal area does that. It's really scary looking. It's something I definitely have to remember to bring up when I go to the doctor.
I don't know if it's the start of PMS or what, but I have been one nasty bitch for the past couple of days. I came home on Friday with such a stick up my ass and was snapping out on everyone and I don't even know why. I was kind of cranky yesterday, but was more emotional than anything. I have been in a pissy mood all day today. And very depressed. Maybe it's all due the fact that I haven't been sleeping well because I dread going to bed that I am going to wake up feeling warm or worse, having an actual full-blown night sweat episode where I wake up drenched in sweat.
Ugh I am not looking forward to going back to work tomorrow. Back to a full week of work. No more holidays until May. It's going to be brutal.
And everything is so damn dark and depressing. Our lights are off, most of the houses on my street have their lights off and/or decorations down. I can't stand it. It's rained the whole weekend. Today was above 60 degrees and then tomorrow it's going to plummet into the 30's and later in the week it's going to be in the 20's. No wonder I feel like crap. What the fuck, Mother Nature?
And one more thing- I love that commercial for The Eric Andre Show on Adult Swim where a whole bunch of guys dressed alike (a character, I assume- I have never watched the show) are running up the street screaming and then one guy is running behind them with a microphone. I laugh every time I see it. I think there used to be an extended one where they were all beating the crap out of someone at the end, but I don't see that one anymore. Or I imagined it.
The past 3 mornings I have woken up feeling warm. This morning was the worst. And when I finally got out of bed several hours later, I exercised as usual and I was pretty sweaty. Stayed feeling kind of warm, yet chilled for a few hours. And then I felt really chilled the rest of the day. I wish I could explain the feeling warm yet chilled feeling. It's really difficult to explain, though, except to look at this way- when you're hot, you might take layers off or put a fan on or go outside into the cold weather. But I don't want to do that, because I am feeling chilled at the same. Ugh, that's still not a good way to explain it. All I know is I feel like my body temperature regulation is completely out of whack and can't seem to keep me comfortable.
Earlier I decided to take a look down below at things (why, I don't know) and it was that dark red almost purplish color on the inner part and really white on the outer part. I don't understand why in the second half of my cycle, my vaginal area does that. It's really scary looking. It's something I definitely have to remember to bring up when I go to the doctor.
I don't know if it's the start of PMS or what, but I have been one nasty bitch for the past couple of days. I came home on Friday with such a stick up my ass and was snapping out on everyone and I don't even know why. I was kind of cranky yesterday, but was more emotional than anything. I have been in a pissy mood all day today. And very depressed. Maybe it's all due the fact that I haven't been sleeping well because I dread going to bed that I am going to wake up feeling warm or worse, having an actual full-blown night sweat episode where I wake up drenched in sweat.
Ugh I am not looking forward to going back to work tomorrow. Back to a full week of work. No more holidays until May. It's going to be brutal.
And everything is so damn dark and depressing. Our lights are off, most of the houses on my street have their lights off and/or decorations down. I can't stand it. It's rained the whole weekend. Today was above 60 degrees and then tomorrow it's going to plummet into the 30's and later in the week it's going to be in the 20's. No wonder I feel like crap. What the fuck, Mother Nature?
And one more thing- I love that commercial for The Eric Andre Show on Adult Swim where a whole bunch of guys dressed alike (a character, I assume- I have never watched the show) are running up the street screaming and then one guy is running behind them with a microphone. I laugh every time I see it. I think there used to be an extended one where they were all beating the crap out of someone at the end, but I don't see that one anymore. Or I imagined it.
God I Hate Commercials (And Big Pharma)
TV Land must have some kind of sweet deal with Lyrica and Humira, because I swear they play commercials for them EVERY DAMN COMMERCIAL BREAK. Especially Lyrica. Guess Pfizer really wants to push those fibromyalgia diagnoses.
And speaking of Lyrica reminded me of something that happened in work a few weeks ago. My boss emailed us asking us if we include all medications in our reports or just ones that pertain to orthopedics and neurology. I wrote back that I include all and the reason I do so is because so many medications have side effects that can affect the bones or nervous system and also because so many medications have off the box usage, like Cymbalta being an anti-depressant and is also used for pain. And of course, my FWA has to chime in as well and say that Lyrica and Celebrex are anti-depressants and are used for pain as well. I can't tell you how much I wanted to hit "Reply All" and say that neither are anti-depressants. Celebrex is an NSAID, Lyrica is an anti-epileptic. But I wouldn't put it past doctors to use them as anti-depressants.
Also, if I see that Progresso soup commercial with the girl in her ugly bridal party dress one more time I am going to scream. Every time the Progresso person says "don't you love the dress?" and she says "I love my sister", I want to kick something.
And speaking of Lyrica reminded me of something that happened in work a few weeks ago. My boss emailed us asking us if we include all medications in our reports or just ones that pertain to orthopedics and neurology. I wrote back that I include all and the reason I do so is because so many medications have side effects that can affect the bones or nervous system and also because so many medications have off the box usage, like Cymbalta being an anti-depressant and is also used for pain. And of course, my FWA has to chime in as well and say that Lyrica and Celebrex are anti-depressants and are used for pain as well. I can't tell you how much I wanted to hit "Reply All" and say that neither are anti-depressants. Celebrex is an NSAID, Lyrica is an anti-epileptic. But I wouldn't put it past doctors to use them as anti-depressants.
Also, if I see that Progresso soup commercial with the girl in her ugly bridal party dress one more time I am going to scream. Every time the Progresso person says "don't you love the dress?" and she says "I love my sister", I want to kick something.
Sunday, December 14, 2014
Random Thoughts
Well, that was a quick 3.5 day weekend. Friday ended up not being too bad of a day. It just ended up being super cold and one of the main reasons I wanted to go to Peddler's was to see it lit up at night and we didn't even get to do that. Oh, and then there was the whole my brother-in-law could barely stay awake driving and was also tailgating people big time. At one point, we were doing over 80 mph and I don't think he was even 2 car lengths behind the car in front of us. And instead of just going around them, he rides their ass until they get over into the other lane. I swear, I have never met someone so fucking stubborn and arrogant in my life as my BIL.
And then when we went to dinner, at one point I seen him stare at my parents with that look on his face and I felt like throwing something at him. It's pretty funny that my sister can't stand how her mother-in-law stares at people and doesn't realize that her own husband does it as well. Then again, there are a lot of things her in-laws do that she doesn't seem to realize her husband does as well. Like how he acts like an impatient arrogant asshole like his father or how he acts like a know-it-all like his mother. It's amazing how oblivious she is to shit sometimes.
I hate those Big Lots holiday commercials so much. I also hate those Wayfair commercials. That song is so unbelievably annoying. And what in the hell kind of crack is Kmart's marketing team smoking? I just saw that commercial with the pregnant women stripper dancing the other night and almost puked my face off. And the one with the men using their beer bellies as drums.....ew. Do people really find this shit funny? Why are so many commercials so annoying nowadays?
Speaking of funny, I don't know why I never checked it out before, but not too long ago I decided to start reading the comments on Cracked.com's Facebook page. I can't decide whether the Facebook comments or the actual Cracked page's comments are funnier. Or on par. There was a photoplasty contest that popped up on my newsfeed back in October and one of the pictures was of Dr. House as an android looking thing and it was something about artificial intelligence coming to medicine and I knew before I even opened the comments that there was going to be multiple House jokes and at least one reference to lupus. I was not disappointed. When I came across the comment that said "error: lupus not found", I guffawed for about 10 minutes.
And speaking of laughing hard, on Friday I was over on the Berry and there was a section of pictures called Doing Things Differently Photos and a little ways down, there was a picture of a wheelchair parked in a handicapped parking spot and I cackled for about 5 minutes, followed by a feeling of immense discomfort and then immense depression. I was thinking one day how I have said before that I need to just start accepting I am always going to be an outcast and then I thought about how much of one I would become if I ever told anyone about That Thing.
I didn't end up having any bouts of hot sweatiness during lunch, but then again, my soup wasn't super hot. I did feel a little bit warm the whole time I was eating lunch, but I think a lot of that had to do with my being anxious that I was going to end up super hot and sweaty. It also appears that It has decided to grace me with its presence again. I still don't know why it does that. All I know is I am beyond sick and tired of being worried I am going through perimenopause.
And then when we went to dinner, at one point I seen him stare at my parents with that look on his face and I felt like throwing something at him. It's pretty funny that my sister can't stand how her mother-in-law stares at people and doesn't realize that her own husband does it as well. Then again, there are a lot of things her in-laws do that she doesn't seem to realize her husband does as well. Like how he acts like an impatient arrogant asshole like his father or how he acts like a know-it-all like his mother. It's amazing how oblivious she is to shit sometimes.
I hate those Big Lots holiday commercials so much. I also hate those Wayfair commercials. That song is so unbelievably annoying. And what in the hell kind of crack is Kmart's marketing team smoking? I just saw that commercial with the pregnant women stripper dancing the other night and almost puked my face off. And the one with the men using their beer bellies as drums.....ew. Do people really find this shit funny? Why are so many commercials so annoying nowadays?
Speaking of funny, I don't know why I never checked it out before, but not too long ago I decided to start reading the comments on Cracked.com's Facebook page. I can't decide whether the Facebook comments or the actual Cracked page's comments are funnier. Or on par. There was a photoplasty contest that popped up on my newsfeed back in October and one of the pictures was of Dr. House as an android looking thing and it was something about artificial intelligence coming to medicine and I knew before I even opened the comments that there was going to be multiple House jokes and at least one reference to lupus. I was not disappointed. When I came across the comment that said "error: lupus not found", I guffawed for about 10 minutes.
And speaking of laughing hard, on Friday I was over on the Berry and there was a section of pictures called Doing Things Differently Photos and a little ways down, there was a picture of a wheelchair parked in a handicapped parking spot and I cackled for about 5 minutes, followed by a feeling of immense discomfort and then immense depression. I was thinking one day how I have said before that I need to just start accepting I am always going to be an outcast and then I thought about how much of one I would become if I ever told anyone about That Thing.
I didn't end up having any bouts of hot sweatiness during lunch, but then again, my soup wasn't super hot. I did feel a little bit warm the whole time I was eating lunch, but I think a lot of that had to do with my being anxious that I was going to end up super hot and sweaty. It also appears that It has decided to grace me with its presence again. I still don't know why it does that. All I know is I am beyond sick and tired of being worried I am going through perimenopause.
Saturday, October 4, 2014
Yay!
I saw my commercial tonight! It was a shorter version, but.....yay! After they brought back another one, I had a feeling I would see it again eventually and I finally did!
Also, I forgot how haunting "Letters From The Sky" by Civil Twilight is. I listened to it last night for the first time in a long time and it was the first time I cried since vacation.
Also, I forgot how haunting "Letters From The Sky" by Civil Twilight is. I listened to it last night for the first time in a long time and it was the first time I cried since vacation.
Saturday, June 21, 2014
Commercial Rants
I can't even remember at this point the last time I saw my commercial. Weird. I don't even see the other commercials for the product, either. Guess they stopped playing them.
What is the deal with the Cinnamon Toast Crunch commercials? I know General Mills is trying to sell how delicious CTC is, but those little cannibalistic squares are creepy.
The IHOP summer pancake commercial.....HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW WHAT CANNOLI IS?
It was bad enough in the Tide commercial with the mother having to pronounce karate stupidly, but now there is one where the father has to pronounce in that same stupid way.
Why in pharmaceutical pimping commercials do the people always talk about their moderate to severe [insert condition]? Who talks like that? I never talk about my moderate to severe OCD, because for one I don't like to refer to it as "my" (I didn't ask for it) and two it just sounds silly. I prefer to refer to it as the more appropriately named HELL.
Whenever I watch Nick in the morning, there is always this commercial for Ring Pops with some shitty pop band and the girl singer is wearing a shirt that says "Girls rule, boys drool". If you're over 12 years old and wearing a shirt that says that, you need to check your life. And the Payless BOGO commercial I just saw- if you're over the age of 15 and using the term "bestie", you need to check your life. That goes for "BFF" as well. I feel so much second hand embarrassment whenever I see talk shows on in the morning and the anchors/hosts are using the term "BFF".
And speaking of second hand embarrassment, I was just on that Tartlr page I talked about and she posted a few things last night about Andrew and his girlfriend breaking up. She apparently "heard" that his ex cheated but she doesn't think that is true and then posted all of this creepy stuff about following her and the rest of the band's girlfriends on Instagram. And then this is the best part- she gets super pissed when people ask her about it. Uh, you're the one that is invested in it. Yeah, I'll admit that I am curious why they broke up and who broke up with who, but I am ridiculous anyway. Besides, no matter how much I think the sun shines out his ass, if she really broke up with him, I don't feel sorry for Andrew. Well, maybe a little, but that's what happens when you become famous and decide you will only date girls who otherwise wouldn't look at you twice if you weren't famous. Also, never forget this:
And then earlier today she posted something about musicians from the past stealing from POC. God, Tartlr is such a fucking embarrassment. Why is it such a cesspool for "social justice warriors"? Do these people really think they are doing something by bitching and whining on Tartlr?
And why is it white people are always the loudest and most obnoxious of the "social justice warrior" movement? Sit down, white hipster girl.
What is the deal with the Cinnamon Toast Crunch commercials? I know General Mills is trying to sell how delicious CTC is, but those little cannibalistic squares are creepy.
The IHOP summer pancake commercial.....HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW WHAT CANNOLI IS?
It was bad enough in the Tide commercial with the mother having to pronounce karate stupidly, but now there is one where the father has to pronounce in that same stupid way.
Why in pharmaceutical pimping commercials do the people always talk about their moderate to severe [insert condition]? Who talks like that? I never talk about my moderate to severe OCD, because for one I don't like to refer to it as "my" (I didn't ask for it) and two it just sounds silly. I prefer to refer to it as the more appropriately named HELL.
Whenever I watch Nick in the morning, there is always this commercial for Ring Pops with some shitty pop band and the girl singer is wearing a shirt that says "Girls rule, boys drool". If you're over 12 years old and wearing a shirt that says that, you need to check your life. And the Payless BOGO commercial I just saw- if you're over the age of 15 and using the term "bestie", you need to check your life. That goes for "BFF" as well. I feel so much second hand embarrassment whenever I see talk shows on in the morning and the anchors/hosts are using the term "BFF".
And speaking of second hand embarrassment, I was just on that Tartlr page I talked about and she posted a few things last night about Andrew and his girlfriend breaking up. She apparently "heard" that his ex cheated but she doesn't think that is true and then posted all of this creepy stuff about following her and the rest of the band's girlfriends on Instagram. And then this is the best part- she gets super pissed when people ask her about it. Uh, you're the one that is invested in it. Yeah, I'll admit that I am curious why they broke up and who broke up with who, but I am ridiculous anyway. Besides, no matter how much I think the sun shines out his ass, if she really broke up with him, I don't feel sorry for Andrew. Well, maybe a little, but that's what happens when you become famous and decide you will only date girls who otherwise wouldn't look at you twice if you weren't famous. Also, never forget this:
It was the night before your show in Berlin in 2010. It’s like a long, awkward chess match of non sequiturs. You can watch it on YouTube.
BG: I’ve never seen that! We were hanging out with Will Carruthers from Spectrum and Spacemen 3, and I know he’s a friend of Anton’s, but I had no idea that took place.
Andrew VanWyngarden: Yeah, well, Anton’s a pretty far out dude. His girlfriend was in the 8mm Bar, which we happened to pass by, and she came over and was like, “You want to come upstairs to meet Anton?” and so I followed her. His apartment is pretty crazy—I guess you can see it in the video. A lot of cigarette butts everywhere, and guitars too. I’d seen Dig!, and I had met him already at the Accelerator Festival in Stockholm and was aware of his demeanor that’s kind of shape shifting and a little bit wild or something. I had been out to dinner with my ex-girlfriend and then we went to that bar. I actually kind of forgot it happened.
I was at the show the night after and that was the first time I’d seen you live. I remember having the impression that you somehow wanted to break free from the crowd’s expectations but you couldn’t. You seemed almost despondent onstage…
AVW: I broke up with my ex-girlfriend the day of that show. It was very dramatic and awful. I literally bought her a ticket home and then walked onstage, so I think there was some weird emotional stuff happening.All I can say is I hope she did something pretty awful to deserve that kind of break-up.
And then earlier today she posted something about musicians from the past stealing from POC. God, Tartlr is such a fucking embarrassment. Why is it such a cesspool for "social justice warriors"? Do these people really think they are doing something by bitching and whining on Tartlr?
And why is it white people are always the loudest and most obnoxious of the "social justice warrior" movement? Sit down, white hipster girl.
Wednesday, June 4, 2014
Random Thoughts
I just realized I haven't seen my commercial in a while. What is up with that? I'll tell you what it is- because Nick is too busy playing 25 previews (per commercial break) for that stupid Fault In Our Stars move, so they don't have any room to play it!
I am going on week I don't even know at this point anymore of digestive issues. What on earth is going on in there? And this week I switched back to Truvia and I have heartburn and bloating just like when I used it before. There is something in Truvia that I am sensitive to but I am not sure what it is, although my guess would be the ethyritol.
I am still taking those Wal-Green brand probiotics and I am wondering if maybe I can't take them this long. Maybe I need to switch back to my old ones for a little bit and then try them again. I don't want the box to go to waste. Once again, let me remind myself- the next time you want to switch probiotics, STAY WITH THE FREAKING SPRING VALLEY ONES.
Ugh less than a week until my FWA comes back. The silence was nice while it lasted. We got an email in work today informing us of her return date and we all groaned and our most senior employee pretended to cry. I don't even know why she is even going to bother coming back. All she is going to do is leave early and call out even more than she used to.
Man, I am exhausted. I am so close to face-planting my keyboard right now. And that reminds me- I had a nice surprise this morning. I was listening to "Pumped Up Kicks" on 106.1 (it's still a good song, albeit screwy) and I switched over to my usual station.....and "Electric Feel" was playing. I was stoked. Finally they played something other than "Kids" or "Time to Pretend"!
I am going on week I don't even know at this point anymore of digestive issues. What on earth is going on in there? And this week I switched back to Truvia and I have heartburn and bloating just like when I used it before. There is something in Truvia that I am sensitive to but I am not sure what it is, although my guess would be the ethyritol.
I am still taking those Wal-Green brand probiotics and I am wondering if maybe I can't take them this long. Maybe I need to switch back to my old ones for a little bit and then try them again. I don't want the box to go to waste. Once again, let me remind myself- the next time you want to switch probiotics, STAY WITH THE FREAKING SPRING VALLEY ONES.
Ugh less than a week until my FWA comes back. The silence was nice while it lasted. We got an email in work today informing us of her return date and we all groaned and our most senior employee pretended to cry. I don't even know why she is even going to bother coming back. All she is going to do is leave early and call out even more than she used to.
Man, I am exhausted. I am so close to face-planting my keyboard right now. And that reminds me- I had a nice surprise this morning. I was listening to "Pumped Up Kicks" on 106.1 (it's still a good song, albeit screwy) and I switched over to my usual station.....and "Electric Feel" was playing. I was stoked. Finally they played something other than "Kids" or "Time to Pretend"!
Thursday, April 24, 2014
Random Thoughts
Every time I think commercials can't possibly get any stupider, a new one comes out and proves me wrong. The past couple days I keep seeing these commercials for Poise pantiliners, where this lady goes on about how her SAM lasts for hours and is in her pants right now. Even the lady she is talking to is looking at her like bitch please stop talking to me. I get second hand embarrassment every time I see it. I also hate that Tide commercial (I think that is what it is for) where the Lea Michele look-alike (which makes it extra punchable) talks about her daughter signing up for karate. But she can't just say karate. She has to say it with this stupid accent. GRRR.
I keep thinking about how I want to go to someone to talk to, like a therapist. Of course, I am much too lazy to actually get out searching for one, mostly because I know it's going to be a long arduous process of 1) finding someone I can trust and 2) finding someone who I will be willing to be open with. It's kind of sad that I can't even talk to the one group of people I should most be able to- my family. Instead, I just bottle everything up in me, probably creating an environment more toxic than Chernobyl. Well, essentially a good percentage of things I have never discussed in real life are discussed on here. So for the few people who may actually read this stupid blog, you know more about what goes on in my head and tortures me daily than my own loved ones do.
I keep thinking about how I want to go to someone to talk to, like a therapist. Of course, I am much too lazy to actually get out searching for one, mostly because I know it's going to be a long arduous process of 1) finding someone I can trust and 2) finding someone who I will be willing to be open with. It's kind of sad that I can't even talk to the one group of people I should most be able to- my family. Instead, I just bottle everything up in me, probably creating an environment more toxic than Chernobyl. Well, essentially a good percentage of things I have never discussed in real life are discussed on here. So for the few people who may actually read this stupid blog, you know more about what goes on in my head and tortures me daily than my own loved ones do.
Thursday, April 10, 2014
The Awesome Of The Day
I have seen my commercial three times tonight! Yay!
Reading through my past couple posts, if you only knew what the commercial was.....OH THE IRONY*
*it probably isn't really irony; I just wanted a chance to say it
Reading through my past couple posts, if you only knew what the commercial was.....OH THE IRONY*
*it probably isn't really irony; I just wanted a chance to say it
Thursday, April 3, 2014
Random Thoughts
Friday, Friday, Friday, Friday, Friday! Tomorrow is Friday! I finally saw my commercial today! I haven't seen it since Saturday night. And not only did I see it today, I saw it twice!
With the impending end of customer support and updates for XP on April 8th, I'm bugging out. Do I need to run out and buy a new computer or is this all just fear mongering so the executives of Microsoft can make their luxury car payments? With as slow as my computer is getting, between its old age and inadequate RAM with newer programs, I am basically ready for a new computer. But I would really like for this one to kick the bucket before doing so.
Another thing I am bugging out about is my taxes. I have them pretty much done, but I need to endlessly check them over to make sure I didn't make any mistakes. And normally I use NJ Webfile every year to file my state taxes. Well, this year I accidentally entered in the wrong gross income for last year so now I am banned from using it this year and I have to decide whether to file them manually or submit them electronically and pay $30. FUCK.
I made the mistake once again of reading comments in regards to an article on a certain gossip site the other day. I have never been so appalled by that site as I was that day. I will never understand the concept of I hate (insert race) but how dare you hate me for my skin color. IT MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE. You can't get pissed when people hate you solely for your skin color WHEN YOU DO THE SAME THING. It's so fucking stupid! It makes you just as bad!
These people need to pull the sticks out of their asses. And I don't mean just with race. I mean with basically EVERYTHING. EVERYTHING is wrong and evil to these people. People like this are exactly why I side-eye political correctness and the whole social justice warrior movement.
And the level of hate for men, particularly white straight men, is even too much for me. I go on and on about how I hate men, but half the time I don't even think I am being serious. I read an article one time on a singer being accused of rape and right away, he was automatically guilty. According to them, people just don't cry rape for the hell of it and even though it has happened, it's rare. I understand the theory to a degree, but that's still not the point. IT STILL HAS HAPPENED, rare or not. And just because it's rare does not mean this particular case isn't one of them! Maybe he did really do it and if so, may his pretentious ass get handed to him. Or maybe it's just some sick bitch looking for her 15.
"Anthem" by Filo and Peri with Eric Lumiere just popped up on my iTunes shuffle. Holy shit, I haven't listened to that song in EONS. I forgot how good it was!
With the impending end of customer support and updates for XP on April 8th, I'm bugging out. Do I need to run out and buy a new computer or is this all just fear mongering so the executives of Microsoft can make their luxury car payments? With as slow as my computer is getting, between its old age and inadequate RAM with newer programs, I am basically ready for a new computer. But I would really like for this one to kick the bucket before doing so.
Another thing I am bugging out about is my taxes. I have them pretty much done, but I need to endlessly check them over to make sure I didn't make any mistakes. And normally I use NJ Webfile every year to file my state taxes. Well, this year I accidentally entered in the wrong gross income for last year so now I am banned from using it this year and I have to decide whether to file them manually or submit them electronically and pay $30. FUCK.
I made the mistake once again of reading comments in regards to an article on a certain gossip site the other day. I have never been so appalled by that site as I was that day. I will never understand the concept of I hate (insert race) but how dare you hate me for my skin color. IT MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE. You can't get pissed when people hate you solely for your skin color WHEN YOU DO THE SAME THING. It's so fucking stupid! It makes you just as bad!
These people need to pull the sticks out of their asses. And I don't mean just with race. I mean with basically EVERYTHING. EVERYTHING is wrong and evil to these people. People like this are exactly why I side-eye political correctness and the whole social justice warrior movement.
And the level of hate for men, particularly white straight men, is even too much for me. I go on and on about how I hate men, but half the time I don't even think I am being serious. I read an article one time on a singer being accused of rape and right away, he was automatically guilty. According to them, people just don't cry rape for the hell of it and even though it has happened, it's rare. I understand the theory to a degree, but that's still not the point. IT STILL HAS HAPPENED, rare or not. And just because it's rare does not mean this particular case isn't one of them! Maybe he did really do it and if so, may his pretentious ass get handed to him. Or maybe it's just some sick bitch looking for her 15.
"Anthem" by Filo and Peri with Eric Lumiere just popped up on my iTunes shuffle. Holy shit, I haven't listened to that song in EONS. I forgot how good it was!
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
NO WAY
Somehow this does not surprise me:
GOP States Are The Most Dependent On Government
Can the Nick Choice Awards just fucking happen already? If I have to hear one more awful commercial with awful music and Ariana Grande's breathy baby voice, I am going to lose it. Also, I hate that Bounty commercial where the bratty kid is blowing bubbles in his chocolate milk and the little sibling (what exactly is it?) is laughing at him. And Mommy Dearest just smiles and wipes up the mess. And then at the end, encourages the younger one to blow bubbles in its chocolate milk. Why? So she can wipe the mess up with her super duper absorbable paper towels? Wow, what a waste of trees. And yet I haven't seen my commercial since Sunday night!
9:58PM: Saw it! Yay!
GOP States Are The Most Dependent On Government
Can the Nick Choice Awards just fucking happen already? If I have to hear one more awful commercial with awful music and Ariana Grande's breathy baby voice, I am going to lose it. Also, I hate that Bounty commercial where the bratty kid is blowing bubbles in his chocolate milk and the little sibling (what exactly is it?) is laughing at him. And Mommy Dearest just smiles and wipes up the mess. And then at the end, encourages the younger one to blow bubbles in its chocolate milk. Why? So she can wipe the mess up with her super duper absorbable paper towels? Wow, what a waste of trees. And yet I haven't seen my commercial since Sunday night!
9:58PM: Saw it! Yay!
Sunday, March 23, 2014
Random Thoughts
Well, it's that time again already. Hopefully this week won't be bad. It's already been a hundred times better with my FWA out. I mean, it sucked having to do her job with no inkling of how to do it and having someone show me how to do it who has no idea how to do it either, but ugh, it's so nice not having to hear her screechy voice bitching about everything (I know- pot, kettle, but unlike her, I am the first to admit I am miserable human being; plus 99.99999% of the things she bitches about, she is in the wrong) and every fucking detail of her pregnancy.
I didn't have a bad weekend; it was actually somewhat nice. Unfortunately, my head was running a marathon of horrible images so I felt pretty miserable. The good news is, IT appears to be finally coming on, so maybe when it fully comes on, I'll feel a little better. I was about to lose it if it didn't come soon. This is ridiculous having to worry every month that I am never going to see it again.
And speaking of seeing....I haven't seen my commercial since last Sunday *sad face*
I started taking different probiotics last night. I know, I know, I said before I was never going to change them again after my experience with the ones from BJ's, but these are those ones I took last winter from Wal-Green's. I don't remember having any real trouble with them, so I figured I'd give them a shot again. I did forget about how when I started them, I was extremely congested for a few days. Hope that doesn't happen again. I had also questioned whether they were causing the cramping in my lower left abdomen....we now know they were not, since I continue to have it.
Getting my permanent crown this week finally. This temporary crown is driving me bananas. I am so worried about loosening it. Hopefully I won't feel as nervous once the permanent is put on. I am still pissed I had to have it done in the first place. I just wish I knew if I was going to be numbed or not. If they clean the tooth, I hope to God I am! And ugh, I am so ready for next weekend already. I plan on having a hunk of carrot cake. And I promise I will not throw it up. I've been doing good, haven't done it since Christmas (unfortunate I felt I had to do that). And dammit I am ready to go down the shore! I am ready to cram my face with shore food!
"Alien Days" just popped up on my iTunes. I watched that video the other day for the hell of it and it made me feel kinda.....sad. Especially the part when they're sitting at the table and are just looking at each other. Then I slapped myself across the face for having such, uh, alien feelings.
And another thing- I just realized it has been an incredibly long time since I have had an orgasm, minus waking up to them every so often. Jesus. No wonder I have been so grouchy. Unfortunately, I hurt something in my back earlier so getting one tonight is out of the question.
9:58PM: Just finally saw my commercial again! Yay!
I didn't have a bad weekend; it was actually somewhat nice. Unfortunately, my head was running a marathon of horrible images so I felt pretty miserable. The good news is, IT appears to be finally coming on, so maybe when it fully comes on, I'll feel a little better. I was about to lose it if it didn't come soon. This is ridiculous having to worry every month that I am never going to see it again.
And speaking of seeing....I haven't seen my commercial since last Sunday *sad face*
I started taking different probiotics last night. I know, I know, I said before I was never going to change them again after my experience with the ones from BJ's, but these are those ones I took last winter from Wal-Green's. I don't remember having any real trouble with them, so I figured I'd give them a shot again. I did forget about how when I started them, I was extremely congested for a few days. Hope that doesn't happen again. I had also questioned whether they were causing the cramping in my lower left abdomen....we now know they were not, since I continue to have it.
Getting my permanent crown this week finally. This temporary crown is driving me bananas. I am so worried about loosening it. Hopefully I won't feel as nervous once the permanent is put on. I am still pissed I had to have it done in the first place. I just wish I knew if I was going to be numbed or not. If they clean the tooth, I hope to God I am! And ugh, I am so ready for next weekend already. I plan on having a hunk of carrot cake. And I promise I will not throw it up. I've been doing good, haven't done it since Christmas (unfortunate I felt I had to do that). And dammit I am ready to go down the shore! I am ready to cram my face with shore food!
"Alien Days" just popped up on my iTunes. I watched that video the other day for the hell of it and it made me feel kinda.....sad. Especially the part when they're sitting at the table and are just looking at each other. Then I slapped myself across the face for having such, uh, alien feelings.
And another thing- I just realized it has been an incredibly long time since I have had an orgasm, minus waking up to them every so often. Jesus. No wonder I have been so grouchy. Unfortunately, I hurt something in my back earlier so getting one tonight is out of the question.
9:58PM: Just finally saw my commercial again! Yay!
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
Random Thoughts
I wanted to walk out the door at work today so bad. My manager decides to wait until the week my FWA is supposed to go out on maternity leave to bring in a temp to train to do her job. My FWA was going to train her until her last day, which was supposed to be Thursday. Well, guess who went to labor on Monday night? And guess who has been doing her job the past two days? And guess who is being taught how to do her job by SOMEONE WHO HAS NO IDEA WHAT THEY ARE DOING? Yes, yours truly. My manager has no idea how to do these jobs. She'd tell me to do something, then a little while later "oh yeah you have to do this too". ALL DAY LONG.
Then today one of our doctors was in and she asked me to do things a few times that I had no idea how to do. I have never felt so goddamn stupid and incompetent in my life as I have felt the past two days. I was so damn miserable and depressed when I came home from work.
I don't understand what in the hell my manager was thinking waiting this long to train someone. She should know from her own children that a baby can come early! But no, god forbid she plan do do something in advance that needs to be rather than doesn't need to be. No, instead she spazzes out about things that can wait to be done.
So yeah, my FWA had her brat. And she's already writing Facebook statuses about how much she has changed her life and how she never knew what real love was and everything. It's making me want to puke my face off. Ugh. And she ended up having a C-section and is excited because that earned her another two weeks off of work. Nice priorities you have there, asshole.
OF COURSE she had to have a C-section. Anything to be more dramatic. Oh, and when she texted me the other day to tell me she wouldn't be in work her water had broke, my first thought was oh thank god we don't have to go to the work shower! Huzzah! I did really want cake, though.
This week needs to end. I am not sure if I have PMS, since I constantly worry every month that my period is not going to ever come again, but it's a good explanation as to why I feel so miserable.
Also, I haven't seen my commercial at all this week.
And also also....I want pizza. Really, really bad.
Then today one of our doctors was in and she asked me to do things a few times that I had no idea how to do. I have never felt so goddamn stupid and incompetent in my life as I have felt the past two days. I was so damn miserable and depressed when I came home from work.
I don't understand what in the hell my manager was thinking waiting this long to train someone. She should know from her own children that a baby can come early! But no, god forbid she plan do do something in advance that needs to be rather than doesn't need to be. No, instead she spazzes out about things that can wait to be done.
So yeah, my FWA had her brat. And she's already writing Facebook statuses about how much she has changed her life and how she never knew what real love was and everything. It's making me want to puke my face off. Ugh. And she ended up having a C-section and is excited because that earned her another two weeks off of work. Nice priorities you have there, asshole.
OF COURSE she had to have a C-section. Anything to be more dramatic. Oh, and when she texted me the other day to tell me she wouldn't be in work her water had broke, my first thought was oh thank god we don't have to go to the work shower! Huzzah! I did really want cake, though.
This week needs to end. I am not sure if I have PMS, since I constantly worry every month that my period is not going to ever come again, but it's a good explanation as to why I feel so miserable.
Also, I haven't seen my commercial at all this week.
And also also....I want pizza. Really, really bad.
Sunday, March 16, 2014
Blech
Wow, this has been one long ass boring day (actually my whole weekend was boring as shit). Not that I am in any hurry to go back to work, since I am starting to get to the point where I want to crash my car into a tree every morning I have to drive there. But it's just been dragging so bad.
Oh, I am also worried my temporary crown is loose. It never stops!
I saw my commercial twice in one hour. Woohoo! And speaking of commercials, I really hate that State Farm one with the talking baby. UGH. Stop with the talking babies already!
Oh lord, I just read something so awful and terrible I am going to have to wait at least 12 hours before I can even bring myself to comment on it. Also, I need to find a lot of appropriate pictures to post along with it.
Oh, I am also worried my temporary crown is loose. It never stops!
I saw my commercial twice in one hour. Woohoo! And speaking of commercials, I really hate that State Farm one with the talking baby. UGH. Stop with the talking babies already!
Oh lord, I just read something so awful and terrible I am going to have to wait at least 12 hours before I can even bring myself to comment on it. Also, I need to find a lot of appropriate pictures to post along with it.
Thursday, March 13, 2014
Random Thoughts
Ugh, I am so glad tomorrow is Friday. You know, so the weekend can fly by. I am really starting to hate my coworkers. But more on that later.
I finally saw my commercial today after three days of not seeing it. I saw it twice, actually. And am back and forth between three stations hoping to see it a third time. It's kinda sad.
I saw something earlier of Kim Kardashian claiming she is a size 2. No freaking way. My ass is big, but not nearly as big as hers and I can just about get into a 6. Also, Andrew's (possible) ex is a size 4 and look how small she is. No way, no how is she bigger than that lardass.
I was kind of surprised to find out she is only 5'7 and 1/2. Considering all of the criticism I see of that Cara Delewhatever girl only being 5'9, she's practically a midget in the fashion world. But oh man her measurements are basically perfect (33-23-35). Ugh, I feel really depressed now.
I am too old for this shit.
I finally saw my commercial today after three days of not seeing it. I saw it twice, actually. And am back and forth between three stations hoping to see it a third time. It's kinda sad.
I saw something earlier of Kim Kardashian claiming she is a size 2. No freaking way. My ass is big, but not nearly as big as hers and I can just about get into a 6. Also, Andrew's (possible) ex is a size 4 and look how small she is. No way, no how is she bigger than that lardass.
I was kind of surprised to find out she is only 5'7 and 1/2. Considering all of the criticism I see of that Cara Delewhatever girl only being 5'9, she's practically a midget in the fashion world. But oh man her measurements are basically perfect (33-23-35). Ugh, I feel really depressed now.
I am too old for this shit.
Tuesday, March 11, 2014
BOOOOO
Haven't seen my commercial since Sunday. What the heck, man?! It's those Paralympics, isn't it?? If it starts popping up constantly again after they end, then I know damn well the Olympics had something to do with me not seeing it before, and not seeing it now!
Sunday, March 9, 2014
Random Thoughts
I almost thought I would have to write off seeing my commercial this weekend, since I didn't see it last night and I just realized the Paralympics are running and pretty sure the company is a sponsor, but I just saw it during Cosby a few hours ago. Yay!
You know, I still don't know what in the hell has crawled up my ass and died, but it really needs to get out, because I am really becoming one miserable bitch. I don't know what my problem is. I threw a huge fit earlier because I planned on having soup for lunch and there were no Townhouse crackers. I don't even know why it pissed me off so bad, except for the fact that if some people are going to be fucking pigs and hog everything, then they need to freaking replace it.
I am also starting to get really funny about going out. I can't stand being in, but I really just do not want to go out and do anything. And if I am out, after so long, I start getting really antsy and just want to go home. Immediately. Like if I don't get home soon, I am going to freak. I have to go to a wedding reception in a few weeks and I am dreading it so much already.
One day in work last week, my FWA's friend decided that everyone in the office needs to start stretching every so often. And our most senior employee made some comment about how if I was to join in, I'd disappear into nothing. And my FWA's friend just thought that was so funny and had to repeat it to the coworkers who weren't there when it was originally said. Now maybe I am just being overly sensitive, because I am sure they meant nothing by it, but it seriously pissed me off. First off, it's only stretching. It's not going to make me lose weight. Second, I am sick and tired of hearing the comments about how people want to look like me. Well, you can't eat out every day, sometimes several times a day, and expect to look like me!
I know they're compliments, but I am seriously tired of hearing this crap. It's not like I am one of those people who can eat and eat and eat and never gain weight. I work my ass off to maintain my weight. I am extremely sensitive about my body image and having to hear this all of the time, I start feeling like I am being criticized. Criticized for watching what I eat and exercising (I know that probably makes no sense). And if people knew some of the things I have done to keep my weight down (e.g. purging occasionally), they may change their minds quickly.
Also, I have been talking a lot with my FWA and even as much as she drives me nuts, I am starting to feel kind of guilty about bad-mouthing her so much. I don't know why. I often wonder if maybe I am just too paranoid and untrusting of people and maybe she does actually really like me, but....chances are, probably not. Pretty sure she talks about me behind my back.
Ugh, I can't believe it is already Sunday. And this work week is already off to a great start- I have to find a new route to work, because the road I take is going to be closed. Pot hole repair, I assume. God knows how long that will take.
You know, I still don't know what in the hell has crawled up my ass and died, but it really needs to get out, because I am really becoming one miserable bitch. I don't know what my problem is. I threw a huge fit earlier because I planned on having soup for lunch and there were no Townhouse crackers. I don't even know why it pissed me off so bad, except for the fact that if some people are going to be fucking pigs and hog everything, then they need to freaking replace it.
I am also starting to get really funny about going out. I can't stand being in, but I really just do not want to go out and do anything. And if I am out, after so long, I start getting really antsy and just want to go home. Immediately. Like if I don't get home soon, I am going to freak. I have to go to a wedding reception in a few weeks and I am dreading it so much already.
One day in work last week, my FWA's friend decided that everyone in the office needs to start stretching every so often. And our most senior employee made some comment about how if I was to join in, I'd disappear into nothing. And my FWA's friend just thought that was so funny and had to repeat it to the coworkers who weren't there when it was originally said. Now maybe I am just being overly sensitive, because I am sure they meant nothing by it, but it seriously pissed me off. First off, it's only stretching. It's not going to make me lose weight. Second, I am sick and tired of hearing the comments about how people want to look like me. Well, you can't eat out every day, sometimes several times a day, and expect to look like me!
I know they're compliments, but I am seriously tired of hearing this crap. It's not like I am one of those people who can eat and eat and eat and never gain weight. I work my ass off to maintain my weight. I am extremely sensitive about my body image and having to hear this all of the time, I start feeling like I am being criticized. Criticized for watching what I eat and exercising (I know that probably makes no sense). And if people knew some of the things I have done to keep my weight down (e.g. purging occasionally), they may change their minds quickly.
Also, I have been talking a lot with my FWA and even as much as she drives me nuts, I am starting to feel kind of guilty about bad-mouthing her so much. I don't know why. I often wonder if maybe I am just too paranoid and untrusting of people and maybe she does actually really like me, but....chances are, probably not. Pretty sure she talks about me behind my back.
Ugh, I can't believe it is already Sunday. And this work week is already off to a great start- I have to find a new route to work, because the road I take is going to be closed. Pot hole repair, I assume. God knows how long that will take.
Saturday, March 8, 2014
Wednesday, March 5, 2014
Random Thoughts
Commercial count - 17
Thank heavens the baby shower is done and over with. It actually wasn't a terrible day, although I think if it weren't for my coworkers, I probably would have punched a hole in the window and jumped out. And I know this sounds snotty as hell, but the first thing I thought when I walked into the place was, this place is too fancy for someone like her. But it's the truth. And for the first half of the shower, it was just my coworkers and me. Then three ladies came in....with a baby. A miserable little Damian looking thing that did not stop whining and crying and SCREECHING.
And speaking of my coworkers, we have a problem with my FWA's friend. She kind of....smells. Last Wednesday, I kept smelling this bad smell and I couldn't figure out what it was. Then I smelled it again on Friday and then I realized it was a mixture of old Ben-Gay and just a dirty body smell. And THEN I realized I only smelled it when she was around, and add in the fact that she is known for using Ben-Gay a lot in work. So I kind of vaguely brought it up to my coworkers and sure enough, they all said she smells. I don't know if she hasn't been washing her clothes and/or herself or what, but oh my god. I want to throw up.
I hope I have a better weekend than last weekend. I don't know what in the hell was wrong with my digestive system, but it felt horrible. I was so bloated, I had the heartburn from hell, I had lost my appetite, and I was nauseous. I'm still a little bloated and I always have heartburn, but no more nausea and I have my appetite back. All I know is this week needs to get over. It's really dragging like hell. And I don't know what has been up my ass the past two weeks, but I have been one miserable bitch. And I'm so exhausted I want to cry. And I can't concentrate for anything and it's starting to affect my work. I also have a sore spot on the back of my head and I am wondering if it's where I whacked when I passed out the other day.
And you know what else is annoying me? I keep thinking of that kid I went to high school with and what happened to him and I am so fucking grossed out by it and it pisses me off that it won't leave my mind and that I feel the way I do about it. It makes me feel like a truly horrible person. And there are times I have seen him before at our one local diner we go to and I am telling you right now- if I go on Easter or whatever other holiday we go and he comes in, I might have to get up and leave because I will be so repulsed. Good god I am a horrible person.
And as if that doesn't piss me off, seeing that reeled back in the meningococcemia/septicemia fear. So now I am even more pissed off and want to punch something. But at least I am no longer worrying about a tooth abscess or Addison's disease. Well, no. That isn't true. They're still there, but not on the front burner. They will have their time to shine again.
You know, the only good thing that ever came from worrying about a blood infection was that it was what stopped me from cutting.
I'm supposed to go for a crown tomorrow. I really don't want to, mostly because I just don't want to put out the money and I don't want to be numb for hours, which in turn will disrupt my dinner and snack times. Plus, being numb is just really freaking annoying.
And one more thing- in this picture, Andrew reminds me of the second picture.
Thank heavens the baby shower is done and over with. It actually wasn't a terrible day, although I think if it weren't for my coworkers, I probably would have punched a hole in the window and jumped out. And I know this sounds snotty as hell, but the first thing I thought when I walked into the place was, this place is too fancy for someone like her. But it's the truth. And for the first half of the shower, it was just my coworkers and me. Then three ladies came in....with a baby. A miserable little Damian looking thing that did not stop whining and crying and SCREECHING.
And speaking of my coworkers, we have a problem with my FWA's friend. She kind of....smells. Last Wednesday, I kept smelling this bad smell and I couldn't figure out what it was. Then I smelled it again on Friday and then I realized it was a mixture of old Ben-Gay and just a dirty body smell. And THEN I realized I only smelled it when she was around, and add in the fact that she is known for using Ben-Gay a lot in work. So I kind of vaguely brought it up to my coworkers and sure enough, they all said she smells. I don't know if she hasn't been washing her clothes and/or herself or what, but oh my god. I want to throw up.
I hope I have a better weekend than last weekend. I don't know what in the hell was wrong with my digestive system, but it felt horrible. I was so bloated, I had the heartburn from hell, I had lost my appetite, and I was nauseous. I'm still a little bloated and I always have heartburn, but no more nausea and I have my appetite back. All I know is this week needs to get over. It's really dragging like hell. And I don't know what has been up my ass the past two weeks, but I have been one miserable bitch. And I'm so exhausted I want to cry. And I can't concentrate for anything and it's starting to affect my work. I also have a sore spot on the back of my head and I am wondering if it's where I whacked when I passed out the other day.
And you know what else is annoying me? I keep thinking of that kid I went to high school with and what happened to him and I am so fucking grossed out by it and it pisses me off that it won't leave my mind and that I feel the way I do about it. It makes me feel like a truly horrible person. And there are times I have seen him before at our one local diner we go to and I am telling you right now- if I go on Easter or whatever other holiday we go and he comes in, I might have to get up and leave because I will be so repulsed. Good god I am a horrible person.
And as if that doesn't piss me off, seeing that reeled back in the meningococcemia/septicemia fear. So now I am even more pissed off and want to punch something. But at least I am no longer worrying about a tooth abscess or Addison's disease. Well, no. That isn't true. They're still there, but not on the front burner. They will have their time to shine again.
You know, the only good thing that ever came from worrying about a blood infection was that it was what stopped me from cutting.
I'm supposed to go for a crown tomorrow. I really don't want to, mostly because I just don't want to put out the money and I don't want to be numb for hours, which in turn will disrupt my dinner and snack times. Plus, being numb is just really freaking annoying.
And one more thing- in this picture, Andrew reminds me of the second picture.
Saturday, March 1, 2014
Random Thoughts
Got my hair cut today. Pretty sure I may have the same hairdo as Will Berman right now.
Commercial count - 10. Saw it twice last night and just a few minute ago during Food Factory. It's funny- last night I was looking for the words to that new Little Caesars commercial and I came across the website Commercials I Hate. Good site, if you hate most commercials like I do. Anyway, I was curious to see if the commercial was on there and surprisingly, it was. A lot of people complaining about the "political correctness" of it. I am not a big fan of being PC, but I do try to be to a certain degree. But I have to say, the political correctness these people are talking about totally went over my head. I see it somewhat now, but guess I am just not that PC observant.
I read the whole thread and was actually surprised to find out one of the people in the video is an actor. Not acting in the commercial itself, but as a normal job. I was even more shocked to find out said person is younger than me. Only like a year or so, but still.
Damn, I don't know what that "thing" I had the other day did to me, but I feel so miserable right now. All yesterday I was slightly nauseous and a little more nauseous at night. I went to eat a banana and after I opened it up, I couldn't bring myself to eat it. My Jell-O made me want to throw up. I woke up feeling incredibly bloated and nauseous. I am even more bloated and nauseous right now. I have no appetite and am turned off by a lot of foods. Haven't gone to the bathroom since Thursday. My lower left side is making an unbelievable racket and I have so much trapped gas and even 4 Gas-Ex pills haven't done anything (sorry). Oh, and I have the heartburn from hell.
I feel almost like I did that time in December 2012 when I was spotting during my period. I have actually been having some brown spotting the past several days so I don't know if that has anything to do with it or what. All I know is I want this to go away.
When someone is probably an undiagnosed hypochondriac, the worst thing is for the person to get sick. Especially if the person hasn't quite shed the fear of a specific disease and is experiencing things that are symptoms of said disease.
On Friday morning, I opened up my email in work and I had several emails, all office memos from my manager being nit-picky about this or that in the office. And the last one was to me, telling me to put in my PTO request for calling out on Thursday. Oh, and she knows I sounded upset on the phone when I called her, but next time I need to give a reason why I am calling out. First off, how often do I call out? I have worked for this damn company for a combined total of 2.5 years. I have called out unexpectedly ONE other time. And I gave a reason when I called! Two, she knows I sounded upset, so clearly I wasn't calling out for shits and giggles. Three, she could have simply just asked me. Or asked me the next day. Under normal circumstances I would have definitely have given a reason. It's not like I did it on purpose. But let's see, uh, I just passed out about 15 minutes prior to calling. I was very shook up and anxious and wasn't exactly clearheaded.
Ugh, I am not looking forward to this baby shower tomorrow.
Commercial count - 10. Saw it twice last night and just a few minute ago during Food Factory. It's funny- last night I was looking for the words to that new Little Caesars commercial and I came across the website Commercials I Hate. Good site, if you hate most commercials like I do. Anyway, I was curious to see if the commercial was on there and surprisingly, it was. A lot of people complaining about the "political correctness" of it. I am not a big fan of being PC, but I do try to be to a certain degree. But I have to say, the political correctness these people are talking about totally went over my head. I see it somewhat now, but guess I am just not that PC observant.
I read the whole thread and was actually surprised to find out one of the people in the video is an actor. Not acting in the commercial itself, but as a normal job. I was even more shocked to find out said person is younger than me. Only like a year or so, but still.
Damn, I don't know what that "thing" I had the other day did to me, but I feel so miserable right now. All yesterday I was slightly nauseous and a little more nauseous at night. I went to eat a banana and after I opened it up, I couldn't bring myself to eat it. My Jell-O made me want to throw up. I woke up feeling incredibly bloated and nauseous. I am even more bloated and nauseous right now. I have no appetite and am turned off by a lot of foods. Haven't gone to the bathroom since Thursday. My lower left side is making an unbelievable racket and I have so much trapped gas and even 4 Gas-Ex pills haven't done anything (sorry). Oh, and I have the heartburn from hell.
I feel almost like I did that time in December 2012 when I was spotting during my period. I have actually been having some brown spotting the past several days so I don't know if that has anything to do with it or what. All I know is I want this to go away.
When someone is probably an undiagnosed hypochondriac, the worst thing is for the person to get sick. Especially if the person hasn't quite shed the fear of a specific disease and is experiencing things that are symptoms of said disease.
On Friday morning, I opened up my email in work and I had several emails, all office memos from my manager being nit-picky about this or that in the office. And the last one was to me, telling me to put in my PTO request for calling out on Thursday. Oh, and she knows I sounded upset on the phone when I called her, but next time I need to give a reason why I am calling out. First off, how often do I call out? I have worked for this damn company for a combined total of 2.5 years. I have called out unexpectedly ONE other time. And I gave a reason when I called! Two, she knows I sounded upset, so clearly I wasn't calling out for shits and giggles. Three, she could have simply just asked me. Or asked me the next day. Under normal circumstances I would have definitely have given a reason. It's not like I did it on purpose. But let's see, uh, I just passed out about 15 minutes prior to calling. I was very shook up and anxious and wasn't exactly clearheaded.
Ugh, I am not looking forward to this baby shower tomorrow.
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