It's Puppy Bowl! I have had it on since it started at 3, minus 2 hours of Food Factory. Goat cheerleaders! Katty Furry (who sounds remarkably better than her human counterpart)! Kitten halftime! And best of all, there is an actual full miniature schnauzer this year!
I can't believe the weekend is over already. I feel like I just got off of work and it's Sunday night already. And I did nothing the whole weekend! I am so fucking disgusted.
And I have been having some bleeding the past couple days. Over 2 years; I am so over this. I just want to know why this is happening. All I have concluded is it seems to basically occur around and/or during ovulation time. Is something wrong? It is normal? Is it something I am just basically going to have to deal with until my womanly parts decide to quit?
I am really starting to hate going into work. And it's not even so much that I hate my job itself; it's because I have so much trouble doing my job because of my stupidity in allowing mental illness to take over my life. And I at least can say that yes, I do have a major problem and yes, I would like to get better. But it's also clashing with the part of me that doesn't want to fight to get better and would rather just die. And the latter is starting to want to take control.
And then this shit with That Thing- I know damn well deep down that even if it happened to me, I would not be any happier. I would probably be just as miserable, if not possibly more.
Showing posts with label Puppy Bowl. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Puppy Bowl. Show all posts
Sunday, February 1, 2015
Sunday, February 3, 2013
Random Thoughs
It's Puppy Bowl time! Huzzah! The amount of squee is already ridiculously high. And this year there are finally two puppies with schnauzer in them!
So I finally got to go to dinner on Friday for my birthday with my aunt. It makes no sense how she was off for 5 days last week, but we end up going on Friday, when she is back to work. Whatever. I am beyond sick and tired of even trying to understand her logic of thinking. It ended up just being my aunt, my sister, and me. I was kind of hoping more people would have went. My mother decided not to go, which I was a little pissed off at her for. My aunt never specified when she said about taking me to dinner whether it was just supposed to be the two of us or whoever wanted to go. She asked me who was going and I told her REPEATEDLY whoever wanted to. She never said anything to any of her friends, who are pretty much like aunts to me. And while I don't care that she went, but my sister just kind of invited herself to go.
And so with my sister going, almost the entire night involved talking about her pregnancy and kids. I am sorry that I am sounding like such a narcissistic twat, but come on! We are out for my birthday! There are a million other more exciting things to discuss than my sister's pregnancy and children! I don't like most children! I don't want to discuss them!
My sister is turning into one of those high-maintenance pregnant women. All she does is complain that nobody watches out for the pregnant girl when we are out. First off, when she is wearing her coat, which is generally all the time, you can hardly tell she is pregnant. She complained on Friday when she went to go sit down in the waiting area and this woman and her daughter grabbed part of the bench before she got over there. My sister had a heavy coat and a scarf on. You could not even tell she was pregnant.
And speaking of waiting areas, why do restaurants that have high traffic never have huge waiting areas? Longhorn, the Cheesecake Factory (which is where I chose to go), etc. Their waiting areas are tiny. And I still will never understand what the big freaking deal is with the Cheesecake Factory, aside from their cheesecake. Their food is good, but it's not that great. We got there after 7PM and still had almost an hour wait. With as much traffic that place gets, they need to build them in a fucking factory! When we had the Spaghetti Warehouse in Philly (RIP), it was in an enormous old building. That's what they need to put the Cheesecake Factory in.
I'm also pissed because they took the Oreo cheesecake off of the menu.
And speaking of RIP....Barney Bush died! I was full of sads when I read that on Friday.
Well it has been 3 weeks since I quit birth control. My digestive system feels so much better. I mean, I have suspected IBS-C, so I still have um, shitty feeling days, but I feel nowhere near as bad as I did on birth control. And the scale is finally back to where it should be. Today I am not feeling too hot after eating Olive Garden on Wednesday, Cheesecake Factory on Friday, and the local diner yesterday and as usual, I'd feel so much better if I could just go to the damn bathroom, but that clearly is not happening. I am finally trying a new stronger pro-biotic and I start tonight. I am a little nervous if it will make me feel bloated until I adjust to the new formula. I have been taking 2 billion of acidophilus. The new pro-biotics are 20 billion of mixed bacterial strains.
But still no period. And it's bugging the shit out of me. And not helping to stop the slowly growing anxiety that all of this is perimenopause. Have I ever mentioned how much I hate my brain?
So I finally got to go to dinner on Friday for my birthday with my aunt. It makes no sense how she was off for 5 days last week, but we end up going on Friday, when she is back to work. Whatever. I am beyond sick and tired of even trying to understand her logic of thinking. It ended up just being my aunt, my sister, and me. I was kind of hoping more people would have went. My mother decided not to go, which I was a little pissed off at her for. My aunt never specified when she said about taking me to dinner whether it was just supposed to be the two of us or whoever wanted to go. She asked me who was going and I told her REPEATEDLY whoever wanted to. She never said anything to any of her friends, who are pretty much like aunts to me. And while I don't care that she went, but my sister just kind of invited herself to go.
And so with my sister going, almost the entire night involved talking about her pregnancy and kids. I am sorry that I am sounding like such a narcissistic twat, but come on! We are out for my birthday! There are a million other more exciting things to discuss than my sister's pregnancy and children! I don't like most children! I don't want to discuss them!
My sister is turning into one of those high-maintenance pregnant women. All she does is complain that nobody watches out for the pregnant girl when we are out. First off, when she is wearing her coat, which is generally all the time, you can hardly tell she is pregnant. She complained on Friday when she went to go sit down in the waiting area and this woman and her daughter grabbed part of the bench before she got over there. My sister had a heavy coat and a scarf on. You could not even tell she was pregnant.
And speaking of waiting areas, why do restaurants that have high traffic never have huge waiting areas? Longhorn, the Cheesecake Factory (which is where I chose to go), etc. Their waiting areas are tiny. And I still will never understand what the big freaking deal is with the Cheesecake Factory, aside from their cheesecake. Their food is good, but it's not that great. We got there after 7PM and still had almost an hour wait. With as much traffic that place gets, they need to build them in a fucking factory! When we had the Spaghetti Warehouse in Philly (RIP), it was in an enormous old building. That's what they need to put the Cheesecake Factory in.
I'm also pissed because they took the Oreo cheesecake off of the menu.
And speaking of RIP....Barney Bush died! I was full of sads when I read that on Friday.
Well it has been 3 weeks since I quit birth control. My digestive system feels so much better. I mean, I have suspected IBS-C, so I still have um, shitty feeling days, but I feel nowhere near as bad as I did on birth control. And the scale is finally back to where it should be. Today I am not feeling too hot after eating Olive Garden on Wednesday, Cheesecake Factory on Friday, and the local diner yesterday and as usual, I'd feel so much better if I could just go to the damn bathroom, but that clearly is not happening. I am finally trying a new stronger pro-biotic and I start tonight. I am a little nervous if it will make me feel bloated until I adjust to the new formula. I have been taking 2 billion of acidophilus. The new pro-biotics are 20 billion of mixed bacterial strains.
But still no period. And it's bugging the shit out of me. And not helping to stop the slowly growing anxiety that all of this is perimenopause. Have I ever mentioned how much I hate my brain?
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