Random Thoughts

I keep seeing all of these parodies popping up on the internet of that "10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman" video. I am so glad people find it so fucking funny for a woman to be treated that way. I wonder how the men making all of these parodies would feel if it was their own female flesh and blood in that video. I bet they would be real thrilled.

Also, I am sick of seeing that "Ebola nurse". I thought we were finally done having to hear any more of her incessant whining, but then my local news talked about her last night. Bitch, you worked with Ebola patients. Stop whining and sit the fuck down already.

Last night I was in Target and I was looking at ice cream and I saw pumpkin pie ice cream (Market Pantry brand) and it was not only just 130 calories for a half cup, but it also said it had pie crust pieces in it, so I decided to buy it. Oh my god it is SO GOOD. Almost like a pumpkin pie Blizzard.

Friday night I must have been really tired, because I could barely stay awake past 1:30AM and except for waking up once to pee, I slept until 11:45AM. I haven't slept that late in a long time. And I was pissed because I missed Sea Rescue. And yet somehow I was still very tired all Saturday. I was also so damn moody and depressed yesterday I couldn't stand it. And then going out and seeing all of the Christmas decorations everywhere only made me feel worse. It would be nice if one goddamn Christmas season I could feel pleasant and not like wanting to end everything.

I couldn't even feel pleasant last week at Apple Fest. I felt miserable and depressed then, too. I am so damn tired of it. I just want to feel happy for once. Not that I even deserve to.

And speaking of Peddler's, every time I am in the Pine Wreath & Candle store, I always think of that time I was in there and heard "A Song Can Change Your Life" for the first time. I have been listening to that song a lot lately again. There is something about the line "we start to see the end of endless nights" that always gets to me. I don't really know why.

I feel like since That Thing came back into my life, I have been seeing a lot more stories in the news about paralysis. It might just be me paying more attention to it and there really aren't more stories, but either way you look at it, it's getting on my last nerve. I was doing a report on Friday and I came across the term "dermatomes", a term I have never heard, so I googled it. Not a term I needed to come across. Not that we see a lot of injuries like that (I think of the 3 years I have worked for that company, I have only seen maybe 3 cases at the most), but honestly, working in orthopedics is not a good thing for me, because it kind of just fuels the fire in that it gives me more access and opportunity to research this stuff. If I have an orthopedic website opened on my computer, I doubt anyone will really question it, because I do need to research stuff often.

I haven't done any research on spinal injuries lately, but I can't tell you how hard and torturous it is to resist doing it. I finally had to clear out both of my browser histories to make it less easy to access the information. Of course I can still go back to the websites and read up on it, but it's easier to resist when it's not right there in your browser history to bring up. It's very hard to resist though. Like having head to toe poison ivy and not being allowed to scratch it. Not that I have ever had poison ivy to know just how itchy it is, but you get the drift.

And going back to the abasiophiliac thing, one thing I always wonder is, how exactly do disabled people actually feel about it? Is it flattering? Offensive? I am guessing if I polled people, it would probably go both ways. If I had someone tell me they were attracted to my mental issues, I am not sure how I would feel about it. I don't think I would feel offended, but I also don't think I would feel too flattered, either. Probably more shocked, if anything. And maybe a little creeped out.

Random Thoughts

I am listening to "A Song Can Change Your Life" by Mark Masri right now. I forgot how pretty that song was. Not quite sure why I stopped listening to it before. I should really be listening to the TV, though, because it's one of my 2 TV nights- it's Food Factory night!

I hate to say this for fear of jinxing myself but my bladder hasn't bothered me in quite a few weeks. And it didn't really occur to me until this week and I started thinking, well, why is that? And then an unsettling thought crossed my mind- was it really bothering me all because of my anxiety? Was my anxiety that bad that it was making me feel those problems? Or think I was?

Ugh, I am so annoyed about tomorrow. I don't want to eat bad! My mom hollered at me earlier that I need to just join in, that it won't kill me (my digestive system begs to differ) and I'll probably just work it off anyway. Still. I want to be bad on my own terms! I wish people would get off my back about my weight and eating habits. I always have to laugh about how everyone tells me I eat terrible yet argues with me when I say I think I might have a vitamin deficiency of some sort. If my diet is that terrible and unnutritious, then why would it be unheard of?

I am so glad tomorrow is Friday otherwise. Saturday my sister and I are supposed to go to the Cheesecake Factory, which means.....PUMPKIN CHEESECAKE!*

*yes, my life is so sad I am excited about cheesecake

Random Thoughts

Ugh, I have been so damn horny the past few days. I don't know why, except that I am more than likely ovulating, judging by physical evidence. It's really bad, like if a hot guy were to tell me he wanted to have sex with him, all I can think of is 2 words- crushed pelvises. And guys with seriously weird hair seem to be really igniting my loins.

But thank god I am not having sex, because according to WebMD I am apparently at my highest fertility period right now. And we don't want to take any chances with that now, do we? Because we all know if I am not going through early menopause and/or having hormonal problems, that I am probably fertile as fuck, right? Sure I'd use protection, because I'd never have sex without battening down the hatches, but why take that risk?

Come to think of it, it has been more than a few days. I was super randy on vacation. The whole ride home I was about to lose my mind. Do you know how difficult it is to sit in a car for over 11 hours with your lady parts tingling?

I was about 127, 128* pounds when I got on the scale this morning. I am a very unhappy camper. I was 124, 125* pounds before I left for vacation. I am so bloated I want to scream. I don't understand why this bloating is not going away. When I get like this, I start to worry that I am going to be one of those cases I have read about on the internet in the past, where the person has bloating and weight gain and the doctors can't find any answer and the person continues to gain weight . I swear to God I will do myself in if that happens.

*the reason I put the range is because my scale is super ancient and has a needle and all it does is bob back and forth

I was super excited when iOS 8 was released the other day, because the last Apple update is murdering my battery, and I was all set to update my iPad, only to discover that I need about 4 point something GB of space to update and I don't even have a gig of space. I raged hard.

"Let Her Go" by Passenger popped up in my iTunes shuffle earlier. I can finally listen to that song without wanting to scream, since I no longer hear it 5,000 times a day.

The one thing I like about my favorite radio station is they generally don't overplay shit, but every so often they will get a song and kill the hell out of it. I am starting to grow a little tired of "Take Me To Church" by Hozier and "Riptide" by Vance Joy, two songs I do like but they constantly play and play and play and play. Also, some of the stuff they continue to play is questionable. Like enough with the stupid frat boy shit they play, like "Freshman" by the Verve or that annoying song about the car is in the front yard and he's sleeping with his clothes on (god that song makes me SEETHE). And for the love of God, enough with Oasis and Blink-182!

And then when they finally decide to play something other than "Kids" and "Time to Pretend" they choose something off of Oracular Spectacular! There are two other albums, folks! Then again, I tend to forget that most people dislike those brilliant albums.

And speaking of shuffle mixes and rage, how in the hell is it I hit shuffle on a playlist of almost 900 songs and I swear I hear the same ones over and over again? The hell, Apple?!

Earlier in work, 3 of my coworkers were out on a smoke break and my FWA had just come back from lunch (50 minutes) and asked me where they were out and I told her. She makes some comment that oh they seem to take a lot of smoke breaks anymore (as far as I know, they only take 2 while on the clock), oh but she got lectured about her pumping. I just looked at her. I haven't heard her do it in awhile, but apparently she still likes to play the oh everyone gets away with shit except for her card. Yeah. Okay. Whatever helps you sleep at night, honey.

"A Song Can Change Your Life" by Mark Masri just popped up on my shuffle list. Damn, I can't remember the last time I listened to that song. Probably 2010.

The WTF Of The Day

Look, I know Wal-Fart is the Antichrist and all, but....THIS:















Look! It enraged me so much, I had to paste the Rageguy meme into the picture!

Seriously? Not one of those "artists" could hold a candle to Mark Masri.

lol- I like how his one album is titles "See My Face". Oh I see it alright. *grrglgrrrrgllgrrgll*

Random Thoughts

Good God, I cannot stand this fucking sexual frustration anymore. I casually mentioned it to my sister the other day. I never seen her laugh so hard. I am glad everyone finds this so funny!

I was in Target the other day and I was looking in the new issue of GQ (come on- like you really have to ask what I was looking at) and "You Shook Me All Night Long" by AC-DC came blasting on one of the display radios. I briefly contemplated knocking over the entire wall of radios.

I despise the show, but I did watch the last 5 minutes of Dancing With The Has Beens And The Why Am I Famous Agains last week and I have one question- who was that man that was eliminated? That man is nothing like the Neanderthal knuckle dragger I saw the few times I watched Durrrsey Shur. I think it was an alien. Shoot it in the back! Quick! While it's not looking!

NOOO! Wait! Why would we want to shoot the alien?! Shoot the real thing!

I watched a clip of him dancing on some Popeater article. He's a hideous dancer. He makes Carlton Banks look like Fred Astaire. He makes my dancing look good and I'm just about the worst dancer on Earth. Oh okay, I really didn't think he was that terrible. Call me a sucker, but I thought he was cute when he danced. He probably did better than I ever would. I can't even walk a crooked line. But that doesn't stop me from laughing hard at this picture. And this one. Awkward much?

Unpositive? For the love of....REALLY, Mike?

I lol'd at this picture, too. He looks rather....uh....glittery? And that shirt reminds me of one my sister just gave me. I'm sorry, I have to ask this....do straight guys wear shirts like this? Yes, I know someone else probably chose it, but why do I not see any other guys dressing like that?

Speaking of men, I saw a picture of Mark Masri for the first time and *opera sings*. Although I do not know his height, I finally have come to understand the appeal of tall, dark, and handsome. Fucking talented as hell too. That voice! And the best part? He's Cana-nadian. Oh my yes.

I also watched the "It's A Jersey Thing" episode of Southpark last week. Guffawed, I did. I almost passed out from laughing when Snookie started raping Cartman and he starts screaming "it's raping me! IT'S RAPING ME!". I also howled at Kyle turning into Kyley B.

The other day in work, it was just the start of my shift and this woman was in who made a big stink from the second she walked in the door. At one point, I heard her screaming at the top of her lungs about something being a sueable offence and she just kept going on and I was about to kick down the door and scream "Ma'am, it is 8AM on a Monday morning. I am tired, I am sexually frustrated, and I have not had an ounce of caffeine in my system yet. SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

I just finally finished my latest issue of Weird NJ and the last article was about something called a Zombie Walk, which is basically just what it sounds like (people dress up as zombies and moan and groan their way around cities and towns). I read the entire article and by the end, I was so ecstatic, I almost died of a heart attack. I want to join in one. We all know how much I fucking love zombies, so this would just be the ultimate thrill.

Lyrics Of The Day

Have you ever heard a song and you are so utterly blown away by the song, you just stand there and don't move? I was in Peddler's Village on Sunday and while in the Pine Wreath & Candle store, there was this song playing and I was so blown away by it, all I could think is, I have to find out who sings this song; it is absolutely incredible. I scrambled to enter some of the lyrics into my phone, but unfortunately, I am too damn slow of a texter, so finally I asked my mom for paper and a pen and scribbled down some of the lyrics to look up on Google. It took a bit of time to narrow down searches, but I finally got it- "A Song Can Change Your Life" by Mark Masri:

You tell me you feel the world we live in
Forever been a cold and lonely place
You tell me that you’ve lost your will to try
To hope that you will find a saving grace

But I know the world is of our making
That we will find the truth that we believe

(CHORUS)
And a song can change your life
A word can open doors
A melody can take us where we've never been before
And a song can change your life

You don't know what's waiting round the corner
The place that lived in shadow becomes light
A breath of time and in the merest moment
We start to see the end of endless night

And life is full of gifts there for the taking
As long as we are willing to try

And a song can change your life
And a word can open doors
A melody can take us where we've never been before
And a song can change your life

And life is full of gifts there for the taking
As long as we are willing to try

And a song can change your life
A word can open doors
A melody can take us where we've never been before
And a song can change your life