I don't know how much more I can deal with my FWA's friend and her
stench. It's so disgusting. I am just so tired of every one I work with.
I am tired of my manager and her attitude.I am tired of listening to
them all complain about how much they hate working there. I am tired of
listening to my FWA complain about her friend and vice versa. All they
do is complain about how the other is constantly late and takes longer
than a half hour lunch and talks too much and spends too much time on
the phone or whatever. Neither of them have room to talk! Pot, kettle!
And
most of all, I am tired of my FWA. God, I cannot wait until she goes
out on leave. She forwarded me an email she got the other day from my
manager, telling her that she comes in late, takes longer than a half
hour lunch, and does not leave at the proper time. She was written up
for all of this in the fall. And guess what she is still doing? All of
that! Do you know why? Because in her deluded mind, she never, EVER does
anything wrong! It's always the big ol mean corporation!
And
I am so goddamn tired of hearing about her pregnancy. Now she has a
cold and is whining nonstop and being all dramatic oh she can't take
anything. So one day I texted my sister and asked her if that was true
and she gave me a list of meds approved for pregnant women. And I told
her about it. A few days later, she is once again whining and oh woe is
me I am sick and I can't take anything. I felt like turning to her and
saying you know what, go fuck yourself, I told you what meds my sister
said you can take but if you don't want to take the word of someone WHO
WORKS WITH HIGH RISK PREGNANT WOMEN, then you're an ass. She knows damn
well she can take stuff, but then she can't be dramatic if she does.
She
was whining about her friend and how she eats at her desk. And then
says she eats at her desk too but she is pregnant and when the baby
wants to eat, she has to eat! I wanted to say to her, oh you're pregnant
huh? I never would have known considering you never talk about it! You
never EVER hijack your own Facebook statuses with some mention of your pregnancy or
wear too tight trashy looking clothing showing off your hideously shaped pregnant
belly (what? It is freaky looking. And now her belly button popped out. Ugh I am so glad that never happened to my sister.) or walking around rubbing your belly
constantly!
She is so ridiculous. She has to make some
mention of her pregnancy to every damn person that comes into the
office, although I haven't heard her say anything to our patients yet,
which I am really surprised she hasn't. Oh you hurt your back on the job
and had to have multiple surgeries? Boo hoo try being pregnant and
sitting at a desk for 8 hours a day. I could SO see her saying that. The
other day the Fed Ex guy delivered packages and she says something to
him that she can't do something (missed what it was) unless she wants to
go into early labor. Sorry, honey, not everyone in the entire world
gives a fuck that you fulfilled your biological duty. And the whole
world isn't going to stop and cater to you just because you got yourself
knocked up.
Oh, and then I find out earlier that my
manager's boss is coming down one day next week with a gift for her and
wants to have pizza and a cake for her before she leaves. I want to
scream. If I could find a way to leave work early that day, I would. I
already went to the damn baby shower. I don't want to have to sit
through another damn one for the little ungrateful bitch.
You
know what it is? For some dumbass reason, people feel sorry for her
because she doesn't have a lot of money. Well, then maybe she shouldn't
have had a baby! Oh, and her boyfriend and she are just realizing NOW
that they cannot fit anything in their ONE BEDROOM apartment and are
going to move sometime in May. Really? Oh, and going back to the
upcoming work shower, my manager's boss has never bought anything for
anyone else in the office who had a baby.
I saw some
post last night about Harry Styles wearing an Indian
headdress and naturally all the morons crying "racism" came flooding out
of the woodwork. These "social justice warriors" are so freaking
embarrassing. I get second embarrassment every time I read any of their
shit (*cough* a certain website I visit daily). NEWSFLASH- YOU'RE NOT
HELPING YOUR "MOVEMENT". In fact, I think
they're making everything worse. Do they even really care, or is it just
the en vogue thing to do? These assholes all need to take a seat
forever.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go check my privilege. Oh wait THERE IS NONE.
Showing posts with label Harry Styles. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Harry Styles. Show all posts
Saturday, March 15, 2014
Saturday, January 11, 2014
Random Thoughts
So I got a copy of my last ultrasound report. The good news is, the right ovarian cyst resolved. The bad news is a functional cyst showed in the left ovary. The myometrium also appeared slightly heterogeneous, which I have no idea what that means. And the thing that pissed me off:
Driving to work on Friday morning was hell on earth. The roads were basically skating rinks. I made a left turn out of my development and my car fish-tailed and almost hit the curb. I pulled over to the side of the road to get my bearings and then continued driving to work. It was bad. I was okay until I had to stop. Then when I would go to start out, my tires would spin. I was never so relieved to pull up in front of work. Getting into the building was no picnic either, considering the parking lot and sidewalks were skating rinks as well. Somehow I managed to get to work on time, but everyone else was late. Which isn't much of a surprise, except for our most senior employee. If she was late, then it had to have been bad.
The whole time I was driving, I was gripping my steering wheel hard and trying to remain calm and I kept trying to remember what direction to turn your car in when you start to slide. Of course, even if I could remember, it would have went right out of my head when I did actually start to slide, because I would do the worst thing possible- I'd start to panic. But I guess I was doing something right, because I didn't get into any accidents. Or I was just really fucking lucky.
I just realized the other day that come Monday, it will be eight years since I was hospitalized. Eight years! Eight years since I made the mistake of going off of Effexor cold turkey and fucking up my entire life. And never feeling the same again. It's also been over eight years since I last stepped foot on a college campus. Ugh, I hate that I turned thirty without a college degree.
And I hate how people will say things to me like "oh they make you do [insert whatever] in college" or trying to tell me some other thing about what college is like. My manager* said to me one day "oh they make you write a lot in college". JFC people, just because I haven't earned my degree yet doesn't mean I have never been to college. And it says right in my resume where I went to school.
*Then again, this is the same person who tried to tell me what Prozac and Wellbutrin were for. O RLY? I had no idea what I was ever on those drugs for!
Also, last night I was thinking about that time a bunch of MGMT fans and 1D fans were arguing over Harry and Andrew and I started to laugh. Okay, so what if Harry happens to wear a bandanna headband and has - gasp - curly hair as well? Did Andrew become the patron saint of curly headed males with bandanna headbands or something and no other male with curly hair can wear a bandanna headband or else they will be accused of emulating Andrew? And really, would that be such a bad thing to emulate Andrew?
And one more thing- when I got off of my bike today and went in to get a shower, I turned the radio and "Time to Pretend" was on. And when it ended, the DJ said about it being MGMT and the song was off of....Oracle Spectacular. I gave the radio such evil eye. Really? You're an alt rock station DJ, the only radio station in my neck of the woods that pays MGMT any attention, and you don't even know the correct name of the album? Gurl, WTF???
High-resolution real-time sonographic imaging of the pelvis was performed transabdominally with the urinary bladder distended. The patient declined endovaginal sonography.Excuse me? I most certainly did not decline a vaginal ultrasound. And what's with the functional cysts? Is this something I am going to have to deal with every month?
Driving to work on Friday morning was hell on earth. The roads were basically skating rinks. I made a left turn out of my development and my car fish-tailed and almost hit the curb. I pulled over to the side of the road to get my bearings and then continued driving to work. It was bad. I was okay until I had to stop. Then when I would go to start out, my tires would spin. I was never so relieved to pull up in front of work. Getting into the building was no picnic either, considering the parking lot and sidewalks were skating rinks as well. Somehow I managed to get to work on time, but everyone else was late. Which isn't much of a surprise, except for our most senior employee. If she was late, then it had to have been bad.
The whole time I was driving, I was gripping my steering wheel hard and trying to remain calm and I kept trying to remember what direction to turn your car in when you start to slide. Of course, even if I could remember, it would have went right out of my head when I did actually start to slide, because I would do the worst thing possible- I'd start to panic. But I guess I was doing something right, because I didn't get into any accidents. Or I was just really fucking lucky.
I just realized the other day that come Monday, it will be eight years since I was hospitalized. Eight years! Eight years since I made the mistake of going off of Effexor cold turkey and fucking up my entire life. And never feeling the same again. It's also been over eight years since I last stepped foot on a college campus. Ugh, I hate that I turned thirty without a college degree.
And I hate how people will say things to me like "oh they make you do [insert whatever] in college" or trying to tell me some other thing about what college is like. My manager* said to me one day "oh they make you write a lot in college". JFC people, just because I haven't earned my degree yet doesn't mean I have never been to college. And it says right in my resume where I went to school.
*Then again, this is the same person who tried to tell me what Prozac and Wellbutrin were for. O RLY? I had no idea what I was ever on those drugs for!
Also, last night I was thinking about that time a bunch of MGMT fans and 1D fans were arguing over Harry and Andrew and I started to laugh. Okay, so what if Harry happens to wear a bandanna headband and has - gasp - curly hair as well? Did Andrew become the patron saint of curly headed males with bandanna headbands or something and no other male with curly hair can wear a bandanna headband or else they will be accused of emulating Andrew? And really, would that be such a bad thing to emulate Andrew?
And one more thing- when I got off of my bike today and went in to get a shower, I turned the radio and "Time to Pretend" was on. And when it ended, the DJ said about it being MGMT and the song was off of....Oracle Spectacular. I gave the radio such evil eye. Really? You're an alt rock station DJ, the only radio station in my neck of the woods that pays MGMT any attention, and you don't even know the correct name of the album? Gurl, WTF???
Wednesday, December 18, 2013
LOLing Forever
I saw something on Tartlr again yesterday where apparently a bunch of MGMT fans and a bunch of One Direction fans were tearing each other new assholes over Harry and Andrew comparisons. Something to do with Harry wearing headbands or something. I don't know. I don't think they really look alike, but there is just something about the two of them that seems so similar. And I have felt this way long before the headband came along. Either way, 1D fans need to have seat, MGMT "fans" need to have a seat, EVERYBODY needs to have a fucking seat.
Last Friday, I had to sit at the front desk since someone who always feels absolutely fantastic and never calls out or leaves early decided she didn't feel good and left early and I had the radio on that goes into the waiting room and I thought damn, we have no patients, I wish I had my MGMT CD's with me. And then I thought of "Your Life is a Lie" coming on and someone walking into the office while it was on. And I snickered loudly in my head. Not sure why I found that so funny.
Last Friday, I had to sit at the front desk since someone who always feels absolutely fantastic and never calls out or leaves early decided she didn't feel good and left early and I had the radio on that goes into the waiting room and I thought damn, we have no patients, I wish I had my MGMT CD's with me. And then I thought of "Your Life is a Lie" coming on and someone walking into the office while it was on. And I snickered loudly in my head. Not sure why I found that so funny.
Saturday, April 27, 2013
Bwahahahahahahahahaha
Harry Styles Dating Kimberly Stewart: "She Is Exactly His Type," Source Says
Wow. The lengths One Direction's PR team will go to paint Harry as a cougar hunter is just sad now. Do they even try? Or have they even realized how ridiculous it is and just phone it in?
I remember reading this article right before Musikfest, although I am pretty sure I remember it being a lot longer and Andrew mentioning that he used to watch Beavis & Butt-head (AWESOME), and I don't know how this particular part escaped my attention:
ETA 4/29: I just finally got around to hunting it down again, but here is the original, much longer article I was referring to. I also half-expected Andrew to make some kind of reference to the Phillies during the show, but he disappointed me.
Wow. The lengths One Direction's PR team will go to paint Harry as a cougar hunter is just sad now. Do they even try? Or have they even realized how ridiculous it is and just phone it in?
I remember reading this article right before Musikfest, although I am pretty sure I remember it being a lot longer and Andrew mentioning that he used to watch Beavis & Butt-head (AWESOME), and I don't know how this particular part escaped my attention:
He indicates the new disc will have a sound close to the last album, "Congratulations."Well....that will go over well with the Congratulations haters.
ETA 4/29: I just finally got around to hunting it down again, but here is the original, much longer article I was referring to. I also half-expected Andrew to make some kind of reference to the Phillies during the show, but he disappointed me.
Friday, March 8, 2013
Random Thoughts
Ugh, for the past week, I have been having this dull cramping across my lower abdomen and across my back, and I have also been pretty nauseous. It almost feels like menstrual cramps, but then again it also resembles intestinal cramping. I am not technically due for my period until next weekend, but I do remember having aching like this before my last one, although I don't recall how long it was between the cramps starting and my period coming on. Then again, I don't really recall ever having cramping like this until I started the new probiotics, so maybe it is just intestinal. Or maybe it's both, I don't know. I just know it's annoying.
But the good news- knock on wood- is I only had two days of very light spotting. No more 4 to 5 days worth of spotting, with a couple of those days being actual bleeding. I still felt pretty shitty physically and emotionally. I am pretty much at the point of having one week out of a 4 week cycle of feeling semi-normal. I am dreading if I have PMS like last month. That was bad.
I still keep feeling like maybe I should have that pelvic ultrasound done, although I did just find out my prescription is for a transvaginal one and frankly, I am not that keen on the idea of sticking an ultrasound probe up my lady parts. I want to cry at the thought of it.
I was cleaning earlier and I started to feel not so hot, so of course the first thing I think is, I need to take my blood pressure. And when I did, it came up 100/61. I was not very calm after that. It hasn't run that low in a long time. Lately, it has been at coming up around 110/70. But boy it was nice when I went that long stretch of not even thinking about my blood pressure. Too bad that couldn't last. I'll probably go take it after I am done this.
Harry Styles displays his latest tattoo
GESU MARIA GIUSEPPE, HARRY! Ugh! I have nothing against tattoos (I have two myself, on each ankle. One is the size of a dime, the other is the size of a quarter. Half the time, I forget I even have them.), but he needs to stop.
ETA 9:49PM: My blood pressure was, oddly enough, a perfect 110/70.
Also, off and on all night, there has been this strange booming going on. Almost like thunder. Reminds me of some of the stories I have read in Weird NJ of booms. It's kind of freaky.
12:44AM: Maybe this was the cause of the booms?
But the good news- knock on wood- is I only had two days of very light spotting. No more 4 to 5 days worth of spotting, with a couple of those days being actual bleeding. I still felt pretty shitty physically and emotionally. I am pretty much at the point of having one week out of a 4 week cycle of feeling semi-normal. I am dreading if I have PMS like last month. That was bad.
I still keep feeling like maybe I should have that pelvic ultrasound done, although I did just find out my prescription is for a transvaginal one and frankly, I am not that keen on the idea of sticking an ultrasound probe up my lady parts. I want to cry at the thought of it.
I was cleaning earlier and I started to feel not so hot, so of course the first thing I think is, I need to take my blood pressure. And when I did, it came up 100/61. I was not very calm after that. It hasn't run that low in a long time. Lately, it has been at coming up around 110/70. But boy it was nice when I went that long stretch of not even thinking about my blood pressure. Too bad that couldn't last. I'll probably go take it after I am done this.
Harry Styles displays his latest tattoo
GESU MARIA GIUSEPPE, HARRY! Ugh! I have nothing against tattoos (I have two myself, on each ankle. One is the size of a dime, the other is the size of a quarter. Half the time, I forget I even have them.), but he needs to stop.
ETA 9:49PM: My blood pressure was, oddly enough, a perfect 110/70.
Also, off and on all night, there has been this strange booming going on. Almost like thunder. Reminds me of some of the stories I have read in Weird NJ of booms. It's kind of freaky.
12:44AM: Maybe this was the cause of the booms?
Thursday, February 7, 2013
LOLWUT Part 2
Relationship Runway Rant
I don't know what's funnier- this Blind Item or the picture of Harry. He looks like, KILL ME.
I don't know what's funnier- this Blind Item or the picture of Harry. He looks like, KILL ME.
Friday, February 1, 2013
Yay!
Thirty years ago on this day, God said "I shall create a male child who will grow up to be the most beautiful man alive". Eleven years later, God said "I shall create a male child who will grow up to be the most adorable little prince alive".
Happy birthday, you flawless curly-headed specimens.
Happy birthday, you flawless curly-headed specimens.
Sunday, January 27, 2013
LOLWUT
Who’s The Hottest Man in Music?
Oh Harry. You are adorable. Too adorable for words. But hottest man in music? I don't think so.
Oh Harry. You are adorable. Too adorable for words. But hottest man in music? I don't think so.
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Random Thoughts
Going on five days of no birth control. Still nauseous. My face is breaking out again (huzzah), although that may be due to going back to Folgers coffee. Maxwell House seemed a lot lighter and I don't think I broke out as bad. I don't feel as irritable. I just feel like my normal irritable self. My normal irritable guilt-racked self. I feel horribly guilty going off of the pill, but I don't like being on it. I'm not needing to prevent any pregnancies (at this point, I should probably just start accepting I am going to more than likely die a virgin one day. Honestly, I don't even care anymore). If that is what it was being used for, then I would be more hesitant to go off of it.
Unlike many people, the only thing I never had a problem with was remembering to take it the same time every day. Every night, on cue, 8PM sharp. I already did that with other pills I take, so it came pretty natural for me. It's one thing in life I can do right.
I don't like the idea of having a man-made product determine when I am getting my period. And now I am upset because before I went on the pill, and aside from the mid-cycle bleeding, I had pretty regular periods. God knows what a month of faux hormones has done to my cycle. I don't like that I have felt so awful the last time I stopped the pill, and this time that I stopped the pill. I was only on them a month. How much did they do in that little time?
And I can't stress it enough- I don't like being on the pill to stop this mid-cycle bleeding without knowing why I am having mid-cycle bleeding. Hormone imbalancement? Okay, then the pill would be beneficial. But wouldn't it help to know that it is definitely one?
I mentioned before it could be my thyroid. I doubt it, since my thyroid is always normal and aside from showing many signs of hypothyroidism I am not having any unexplained weight gain, but you never know. I do have a script for a TSH test, but I don't know how much it would cost me to have it done. What I do know is birth control won't help with a low functioning thyroid.
Vitamin deficiency? Possible. I still think it is very possible I am lacking something. I can't imagine I am not. My diet is atrocious. Tons of caffeine, tons of aspartame, tons of diet Coke, coffee, processed foods, refined sugars, fried foods, etc. I am on a huge cheese and huge peanut butter kick anymore. I could eat pounds of cheese if given the opportunity. Many days I would like to go into the kitchen and eat an entire jar of peanut butter. I crave chocolate like it's going out of style. The healthiest thing I eat every day is an apple, and I am not even sure that the apples I eat are even big enough to count as one serving of fruit. I'd like to demand a vitamin blood test, but heaven knows how much it would cost. Stupid being uninsured. I'd go into a rant about that, but I'm not in a bad enough mood for that. And nothing nice would come from it.
And I am also starting to wonder if my large consumption of water per day could be contributing to anything. One hundred and five ounces a day. If it's true that you should drink half your weight in water, then I am definitely drinking too much. Maybe I am depleting my body of the little vitamins I am taking in. I only drank 64 oz yesterday, so let's see what comes of that.
I haven't gotten around to talking about it, but I see the faux-mance known as Haylor is already over. Like no one saw that coming. A big LOL at those who honestly thought it was real. Looking at pictures of them together makes me laugh. The look on Harry's face in pretty much all of the pictures was just MEH. Like what in the hell am I doing?
I saw some article that said he broke up with Taylor because she wouldn't put out. Now this was probably er, put out to make someone look good, not sure which one, but if it was true, which it probably isn't, so what? So what if she won't put out? Why is it a bad thing if someone doesn't want to hop into bed with someone immediately? Or even for a while?
And it still annoys me that people were jumping all over her for being 4 years older than Harry. Four freaking years. Big deal. Yesterday a new MGMT post was finally put up over on ONTD (oh god that kitten is so SQUEE) and do you know what people were saying about Andrew and his 8 year younger (give or take a few months) girlfriend, as well as in a few other posts? They are cute together. Which *grits teeth* they kinda are, but no one, not one person, ever questioned what a 29, almost 30 year-old would have in common with a 22 year-old (last I knew that was how old she was). No robbing the cradle comments, etc. Nothing at all.
Honestly, I don't give a shit about age. I'd date someone older or younger than me, as long as they are legal, although I don't think I'd go any younger than 20 or older than mid 40's. Neither age difference is a big deal to me. But it's the fact of the matter than no one questions Andrew, but Taylor gets criticized. If people think a 4 year difference is disgusting, then so is an 8 year difference, regardless of the gender of who is older and who is younger.
But....the article does mention that they are still currently working on the third album. You know, I love entertainers who are not splattered all over the news or tabloids, but sometimes MGMT's vagueness is a little frustrating. Judging by the kitty's face, is it good? I heard "Alien Days" at Musikfest. That was good. At least say how far you are with the album, for God's sake! Many impatient fans, boys! We wants it. WE NEEDS IT!
I feel like my heart is about to flutter of my chest right now. What an awful feeling. I am so tired of feeling like shit and not being able to get an answer. I'm tired of stressing so bad over this, of pretty much being the only thing my mind ever focuses on.
Unlike many people, the only thing I never had a problem with was remembering to take it the same time every day. Every night, on cue, 8PM sharp. I already did that with other pills I take, so it came pretty natural for me. It's one thing in life I can do right.
I don't like the idea of having a man-made product determine when I am getting my period. And now I am upset because before I went on the pill, and aside from the mid-cycle bleeding, I had pretty regular periods. God knows what a month of faux hormones has done to my cycle. I don't like that I have felt so awful the last time I stopped the pill, and this time that I stopped the pill. I was only on them a month. How much did they do in that little time?
And I can't stress it enough- I don't like being on the pill to stop this mid-cycle bleeding without knowing why I am having mid-cycle bleeding. Hormone imbalancement? Okay, then the pill would be beneficial. But wouldn't it help to know that it is definitely one?
I mentioned before it could be my thyroid. I doubt it, since my thyroid is always normal and aside from showing many signs of hypothyroidism I am not having any unexplained weight gain, but you never know. I do have a script for a TSH test, but I don't know how much it would cost me to have it done. What I do know is birth control won't help with a low functioning thyroid.
Vitamin deficiency? Possible. I still think it is very possible I am lacking something. I can't imagine I am not. My diet is atrocious. Tons of caffeine, tons of aspartame, tons of diet Coke, coffee, processed foods, refined sugars, fried foods, etc. I am on a huge cheese and huge peanut butter kick anymore. I could eat pounds of cheese if given the opportunity. Many days I would like to go into the kitchen and eat an entire jar of peanut butter. I crave chocolate like it's going out of style. The healthiest thing I eat every day is an apple, and I am not even sure that the apples I eat are even big enough to count as one serving of fruit. I'd like to demand a vitamin blood test, but heaven knows how much it would cost. Stupid being uninsured. I'd go into a rant about that, but I'm not in a bad enough mood for that. And nothing nice would come from it.
And I am also starting to wonder if my large consumption of water per day could be contributing to anything. One hundred and five ounces a day. If it's true that you should drink half your weight in water, then I am definitely drinking too much. Maybe I am depleting my body of the little vitamins I am taking in. I only drank 64 oz yesterday, so let's see what comes of that.
I haven't gotten around to talking about it, but I see the faux-mance known as Haylor is already over. Like no one saw that coming. A big LOL at those who honestly thought it was real. Looking at pictures of them together makes me laugh. The look on Harry's face in pretty much all of the pictures was just MEH. Like what in the hell am I doing?
I saw some article that said he broke up with Taylor because she wouldn't put out. Now this was probably er, put out to make someone look good, not sure which one, but if it was true, which it probably isn't, so what? So what if she won't put out? Why is it a bad thing if someone doesn't want to hop into bed with someone immediately? Or even for a while?
And it still annoys me that people were jumping all over her for being 4 years older than Harry. Four freaking years. Big deal. Yesterday a new MGMT post was finally put up over on ONTD (oh god that kitten is so SQUEE) and do you know what people were saying about Andrew and his 8 year younger (give or take a few months) girlfriend, as well as in a few other posts? They are cute together. Which *grits teeth* they kinda are, but no one, not one person, ever questioned what a 29, almost 30 year-old would have in common with a 22 year-old (last I knew that was how old she was). No robbing the cradle comments, etc. Nothing at all.
Honestly, I don't give a shit about age. I'd date someone older or younger than me, as long as they are legal, although I don't think I'd go any younger than 20 or older than mid 40's. Neither age difference is a big deal to me. But it's the fact of the matter than no one questions Andrew, but Taylor gets criticized. If people think a 4 year difference is disgusting, then so is an 8 year difference, regardless of the gender of who is older and who is younger.
But....the article does mention that they are still currently working on the third album. You know, I love entertainers who are not splattered all over the news or tabloids, but sometimes MGMT's vagueness is a little frustrating. Judging by the kitty's face, is it good? I heard "Alien Days" at Musikfest. That was good. At least say how far you are with the album, for God's sake! Many impatient fans, boys! We wants it. WE NEEDS IT!
I feel like my heart is about to flutter of my chest right now. What an awful feeling. I am so tired of feeling like shit and not being able to get an answer. I'm tired of stressing so bad over this, of pretty much being the only thing my mind ever focuses on.
Monday, January 7, 2013
Sunday, December 9, 2012
Random Thoughts
Why I even feel the need to continue to comment on "Haylor", I don't even know. But if I wasn't fully convinced it was all for PR, I certainly am
now. I've never seen a more ridiculous "relationship" in my life. And fake or real, I am disappointed in Harry.
And ONTD's posts on it are ridiculous. Actually, their posts in general are ridiculous. I used to just visit the MGMT tag, but then I started visiting the entire site daily. I normally enjoy it a lot. The gifs are funny, the Zayn stans are hysterical. But anymore it is really starting to piss me off. It's too anal and it's full of racist assholes. And hypocrites of THE highest caliber. My God. It's okay for everyone to rip into Zayn's girlfriend and Liam's [ex?] girlfriend. It's okay for everyone to call them ugly and all sorts of other things. Which is a lie. They are both very attractive girls, especially Perrie, Zayn's girlfriend. But she has the nerve to be all white and shit. Heaven forbid you say anything bad about precious pure as an angel Taylor Swift. Then the stans will rip you to shreds. I can imagine how many Taylor stans have called other celebrities whores, sluts etc. But don't you dare say that about sweet wittle Taylor Swift. Then you are a slut-shamer.
And LOL at anyone thinking she is getting laid. That bitch is probably more frigid than me. That is why I won't call her a slut, whore, etc, even though she has had 9 million boyfriends. I was flipping through the channels late one night and her most recent POS (too lazy to type it out) was on one of the MTV Channels and the way she was acting in the video makes me think she is like those girls who are saying passive aggressive nasty things to you in a sweet as sugar voice.
What astonishes me is the number of people (fans and non-fans) who think Harry is gay. I still don't get any kind of gay vibe from him. Maybe bi. Someone posted somewhere in the internet that he is probably someone that will do anything as long as it has a hole. Yeah, I could agree with that. But I could be wrong. Louis, on the other hand.....the gay is strong with that one.
And speaking of the two, while I don't necessarily believe it, I would like to see Larry be real just to blow the minds of ONTD members. If that happened, I would laugh like Stan in the episode of American Dad when Roger keeps insisting he is "the decider".
Not that anyone cares, but the mid-cycle bleeding I have been having has ceased on Thursday. Now I have my period to look forward to coming. If it comes 30 days, I am expecting next weekend. Last month it came 35 days. And I am really hoping I can get in for an appointment with Planned Parenthood before it comes. I am in the midst of talking back and forth with my old boss, but I haven't set up an appointment yet.
I have had my nerves in a turmoil over this. I just want to know what is going on, although at the same time, I don't. And I keep making the mistake of googling it and then I end up getting upset over the potential reasons. One site suggested hypothyroidism. Several symptoms of hypothyroidism sound like what I experience (feeling cold, constipation, foggy mind, sleepiness, depression, dry skin, etc). No weight gain, though. But I have had my thyroid tested so many damn times and it's always normal. So it is more than likely not that. Then there is premature menopause, premature ovarian failure, etc. Both of which can correlate with Addison's.
I just can't even deal with this fear anymore. With the exception of the constant blood pressure taking, I am almost back to how I was before- constantly checking my skin and inside my mouth, being fearful of getting up and feeling dizzy, etc. Running repeatedly through a list of symptoms and mentally checking off what I do and do not have. I am physically and emotionally exhausted from it. I just want it to go away and never come back. And I thought it finally was.
Although I am not underweight, sometimes I wonder if things would sort out if I put on a few pounds. Every so often, I plan on upping my calorie intake to test this theory, but then I get so anxious that I won't be able to control myself and I will put on more than a few pounds.
And ONTD's posts on it are ridiculous. Actually, their posts in general are ridiculous. I used to just visit the MGMT tag, but then I started visiting the entire site daily. I normally enjoy it a lot. The gifs are funny, the Zayn stans are hysterical. But anymore it is really starting to piss me off. It's too anal and it's full of racist assholes. And hypocrites of THE highest caliber. My God. It's okay for everyone to rip into Zayn's girlfriend and Liam's [ex?] girlfriend. It's okay for everyone to call them ugly and all sorts of other things. Which is a lie. They are both very attractive girls, especially Perrie, Zayn's girlfriend. But she has the nerve to be all white and shit. Heaven forbid you say anything bad about precious pure as an angel Taylor Swift. Then the stans will rip you to shreds. I can imagine how many Taylor stans have called other celebrities whores, sluts etc. But don't you dare say that about sweet wittle Taylor Swift. Then you are a slut-shamer.
And LOL at anyone thinking she is getting laid. That bitch is probably more frigid than me. That is why I won't call her a slut, whore, etc, even though she has had 9 million boyfriends. I was flipping through the channels late one night and her most recent POS (too lazy to type it out) was on one of the MTV Channels and the way she was acting in the video makes me think she is like those girls who are saying passive aggressive nasty things to you in a sweet as sugar voice.
What astonishes me is the number of people (fans and non-fans) who think Harry is gay. I still don't get any kind of gay vibe from him. Maybe bi. Someone posted somewhere in the internet that he is probably someone that will do anything as long as it has a hole. Yeah, I could agree with that. But I could be wrong. Louis, on the other hand.....the gay is strong with that one.
And speaking of the two, while I don't necessarily believe it, I would like to see Larry be real just to blow the minds of ONTD members. If that happened, I would laugh like Stan in the episode of American Dad when Roger keeps insisting he is "the decider".
Not that anyone cares, but the mid-cycle bleeding I have been having has ceased on Thursday. Now I have my period to look forward to coming. If it comes 30 days, I am expecting next weekend. Last month it came 35 days. And I am really hoping I can get in for an appointment with Planned Parenthood before it comes. I am in the midst of talking back and forth with my old boss, but I haven't set up an appointment yet.
I have had my nerves in a turmoil over this. I just want to know what is going on, although at the same time, I don't. And I keep making the mistake of googling it and then I end up getting upset over the potential reasons. One site suggested hypothyroidism. Several symptoms of hypothyroidism sound like what I experience (feeling cold, constipation, foggy mind, sleepiness, depression, dry skin, etc). No weight gain, though. But I have had my thyroid tested so many damn times and it's always normal. So it is more than likely not that. Then there is premature menopause, premature ovarian failure, etc. Both of which can correlate with Addison's.
I just can't even deal with this fear anymore. With the exception of the constant blood pressure taking, I am almost back to how I was before- constantly checking my skin and inside my mouth, being fearful of getting up and feeling dizzy, etc. Running repeatedly through a list of symptoms and mentally checking off what I do and do not have. I am physically and emotionally exhausted from it. I just want it to go away and never come back. And I thought it finally was.
Although I am not underweight, sometimes I wonder if things would sort out if I put on a few pounds. Every so often, I plan on upping my calorie intake to test this theory, but then I get so anxious that I won't be able to control myself and I will put on more than a few pounds.
Sunday, December 2, 2012
This Day Can Go Suck It
Well, right on cue, I am having mid-cycle bleeding again. This is ridiculous. What in the hell is wrong with my body? There are a million things it could be, but there is only one thing I am- scratch that, my brain is- now focused on- it could be premature menopause. Which could be a sign of Addison's. My God. Will I ever get rid of this fear? "Sick of it" doesn't even begin to cover it.
FUCK.
And I think it may be related to the bleeding, but I am so bloated I can't even breathe. I have not gone to the bathroom since last Friday, and I am not even certain of that. It might have been Thursday, I don't remember. It's making me sick to my stomach, it's giving me wicked heartburn, and now I am worried I may have an obstruction.
And then there is this [not completely staged] insanity:
Oh No They Didn't! - Haylor Lives!
MY PRINCE IS DEAD TO ME
Kind of funny that there has been nothing since the whole X-Factor thing, then out of the clear blue sky, coincidentally right before both are about to perform at some big concerts, a 2 month old grainy as fuck picture is released that is supposed to be of the two of them, then several hours later, several incredibly high quality pictures are released of two extremely huge stars walking around unmobbed in the middle of fucking Central Park in NYC. Yeah. That does not sound perfectly calculated and staged at all. Enjoy your break-up song, Harold. And if Taylor thinks death threats from the fans are bad now, wait until they break up and she writes a song condemning Harry. Fans will be out for blood, although no one should feel sorry for him. He knows what he is getting into. Or he really is that stupid.
God, some of the people on that site are obnoxious. Yes, a lot of 1D fans are ridiculous, but like none of them have ever been psycho fan girls? Please. Some of them still display their obnoxiousness quite clearly. One of the most obnoxious ones has Rihanna has her icon. Yeah. Someone who worships Rihanna is always a respectable source of advice and opinions. Whatever. I hate to admit it that at almost 29 years old, I still have my stan moments. As if that was not evident by now. But most of it is just sarcasm and exaggeration. It's not like I am out leaving dead rats in his mailbox or anything. Please. I'm not that nuts. And I really don't find him quite as flawless as I make him out to be. I could name a few things I find wrong with him, but I won't.
I think later on I am going to venture into the Larry Stylinson tag on Tumblr land. I have to see this for myself.
ETA 10:31PM: I am simultaneously amazed and horrified. WOW.
I keep catching myself every time someone on Tumblr writes "mgmt". I'm ready to say what do my flawless kings have to do with this Larry stuff, oh right it stands for management. *face palm*
ETA 12/4: Love the abundance of "Haylor" pictures coming out of the woodwork now. For God's sake, this bitch just broke up with the Kennedy kid. Not that he looks like someone who would even care. Boy doesn't look like the sharpest tool in the shed. But come on. It's bad enough she got a hold of him after his mother commits suicide. Then flaunts her new found "boy toy" all over the news? Does she have any kind of conscience? What a fucking beady eyed cunt. This stinks so bad of PR, I can practically smell it coming through my monitor. Shit like this is why I usually cannot ever be bothered with popular celebrities. Everything is so fucking fake!
FUCK.
And I think it may be related to the bleeding, but I am so bloated I can't even breathe. I have not gone to the bathroom since last Friday, and I am not even certain of that. It might have been Thursday, I don't remember. It's making me sick to my stomach, it's giving me wicked heartburn, and now I am worried I may have an obstruction.
And then there is this [not completely staged] insanity:
Oh No They Didn't! - Haylor Lives!
MY PRINCE IS DEAD TO ME
Kind of funny that there has been nothing since the whole X-Factor thing, then out of the clear blue sky, coincidentally right before both are about to perform at some big concerts, a 2 month old grainy as fuck picture is released that is supposed to be of the two of them, then several hours later, several incredibly high quality pictures are released of two extremely huge stars walking around unmobbed in the middle of fucking Central Park in NYC. Yeah. That does not sound perfectly calculated and staged at all. Enjoy your break-up song, Harold. And if Taylor thinks death threats from the fans are bad now, wait until they break up and she writes a song condemning Harry. Fans will be out for blood, although no one should feel sorry for him. He knows what he is getting into. Or he really is that stupid.
God, some of the people on that site are obnoxious. Yes, a lot of 1D fans are ridiculous, but like none of them have ever been psycho fan girls? Please. Some of them still display their obnoxiousness quite clearly. One of the most obnoxious ones has Rihanna has her icon. Yeah. Someone who worships Rihanna is always a respectable source of advice and opinions. Whatever. I hate to admit it that at almost 29 years old, I still have my stan moments. As if that was not evident by now. But most of it is just sarcasm and exaggeration. It's not like I am out leaving dead rats in his mailbox or anything. Please. I'm not that nuts. And I really don't find him quite as flawless as I make him out to be. I could name a few things I find wrong with him, but I won't.
I think later on I am going to venture into the Larry Stylinson tag on Tumblr land. I have to see this for myself.
ETA 10:31PM: I am simultaneously amazed and horrified. WOW.
I keep catching myself every time someone on Tumblr writes "mgmt". I'm ready to say what do my flawless kings have to do with this Larry stuff, oh right it stands for management. *face palm*
ETA 12/4: Love the abundance of "Haylor" pictures coming out of the woodwork now. For God's sake, this bitch just broke up with the Kennedy kid. Not that he looks like someone who would even care. Boy doesn't look like the sharpest tool in the shed. But come on. It's bad enough she got a hold of him after his mother commits suicide. Then flaunts her new found "boy toy" all over the news? Does she have any kind of conscience? What a fucking beady eyed cunt. This stinks so bad of PR, I can practically smell it coming through my monitor. Shit like this is why I usually cannot ever be bothered with popular celebrities. Everything is so fucking fake!
Sunday, November 18, 2012
The WTF Of The Day
Of course, every thing is still just rumors, but this:
Oh No they Didn't! - #Haylor 2012
This bitch. Little Miss Woe Is Me. Little Miss Dumb Open Mouth Shocked Face. Little Miss Innocent, yet goes through men like I go through diet Coke. Can't be without a relationship for more than 5 seconds. She's exactly what I would be in a relationship, except I am smart enough to stay out of them for the sole reason of being completely emotionally unstable. And I would have the clarity to know that after multiple failed relationships that it is more than likely ME, not the men. She's pathetic. The fact that my sister can't even stomach her speaks volumes. I have always hated her music, but I never used to have a problem with her. Now she is just annoying. Her schtick of oh woe is me I'm always a poor wittle victim is old and tiresome. Just the other day I saw an article that said she cries when she hears dating rumors about herself (*sighs* celebrity problems). Oh boohoo. Stop jumping from man to man so quickly and maybe they will stop. Go take a lesson from the Adonis above on how to be a proper entertainer. Actually no. You stay away from him, bitch. If Taylor Swift went near him, my inner psychotic fan girl would come out. She doesn't even deserve to be in the same room as him. Or to breathe his air. NONE OF YOU DO.
I like how this alleged relationship is folding out. Both have new albums out. It just so happens to occur on the set of the American version of the show that made one half so popular. All these "sources" and "witnesses", but no names or pictures or recordings or anything. Yeah. Absolutely nothing suspicious about that. Sometimes I think those crazy Larry people are onto something with the whole "#management" stuff. Everything with these bands and singers always just seems a little too perfectly calculated.
But you know what pisses me off about this, if it's true? The attacks on a 22 year-old woman dating an 18 year-old man. When it's reversed why is it never a big deal? Did Andrew get flack for his last girlfriend, who was 19 years-old in 2009, when he was 26? Did he get reamed out by people? Was he called a cradle robber, immature, etc? I really don't know, because I don't care enough to look. But I am going to go with no, probably not. Because it's okay for men to do it, but when women do it, they are cougars, pathetic, and immature. If I went and told people I'd fuck Louis, who is a day less than 8 years younger than me, six ways from Sunday, I'd get called all three of the above and more. But Andrew- I love you sweetie and I am sorry I am talking negatively about you- will be 30 years old in less than 3 months and can date and screw a 22 year old (if the current SO is who I think it is) and nothing is said. That isn't fair. What the fuck, people? If it's dirty and disgusting if I do it, then it's dirty and disgusting if Andrew does it. No double standards.
If this is ever confirmed by one or the other, the 1D fans will lose their fucking minds. It will be HYSTERICAL what will get thrown at Taylor. This fan base interests me so much that I wish I could do a sociological study on them. Some of this stuff I have seen tweeted at the boys' real Twitter accounts.....how do these people have the backbones and gall to say this stuff out loud? It's one thing to think it in your mind, or say it out loud to your friends, but back off with saying it directly to the person. Or the person's significant other. Or family. Whatever.
And Harry, sweetheart, RUN. RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN.
And to make up for my bad mouthing, I am going to go stare at a 9 picture block of Andrew for the next 10 minutes. Penance, and all that. I like that middle picture at the top. He has such a pleasant smile. And the one below it is adorable. I wish I could remember where I seen a larger version of it. Even the cat looks like, who is this astonishing gorgeous creature puckering up to me? And here is a larger version of the one next to the kitty picture (that hair. THAT HAIR. Those waves and curls. I want to run my fingers through them). And then I have to go watch multiple viewings of their performance of "I Found A Whistle" from MTV's World Stage while I, as well as my ovaries, weep at his beauty. *sniffs* WHY IS HE SO GORGEOUS?!
Oh No they Didn't! - #Haylor 2012
This bitch. Little Miss Woe Is Me. Little Miss Dumb Open Mouth Shocked Face. Little Miss Innocent, yet goes through men like I go through diet Coke. Can't be without a relationship for more than 5 seconds. She's exactly what I would be in a relationship, except I am smart enough to stay out of them for the sole reason of being completely emotionally unstable. And I would have the clarity to know that after multiple failed relationships that it is more than likely ME, not the men. She's pathetic. The fact that my sister can't even stomach her speaks volumes. I have always hated her music, but I never used to have a problem with her. Now she is just annoying. Her schtick of oh woe is me I'm always a poor wittle victim is old and tiresome. Just the other day I saw an article that said she cries when she hears dating rumors about herself (*sighs* celebrity problems). Oh boohoo. Stop jumping from man to man so quickly and maybe they will stop. Go take a lesson from the Adonis above on how to be a proper entertainer. Actually no. You stay away from him, bitch. If Taylor Swift went near him, my inner psychotic fan girl would come out. She doesn't even deserve to be in the same room as him. Or to breathe his air. NONE OF YOU DO.
I like how this alleged relationship is folding out. Both have new albums out. It just so happens to occur on the set of the American version of the show that made one half so popular. All these "sources" and "witnesses", but no names or pictures or recordings or anything. Yeah. Absolutely nothing suspicious about that. Sometimes I think those crazy Larry people are onto something with the whole "#management" stuff. Everything with these bands and singers always just seems a little too perfectly calculated.
But you know what pisses me off about this, if it's true? The attacks on a 22 year-old woman dating an 18 year-old man. When it's reversed why is it never a big deal? Did Andrew get flack for his last girlfriend, who was 19 years-old in 2009, when he was 26? Did he get reamed out by people? Was he called a cradle robber, immature, etc? I really don't know, because I don't care enough to look. But I am going to go with no, probably not. Because it's okay for men to do it, but when women do it, they are cougars, pathetic, and immature. If I went and told people I'd fuck Louis, who is a day less than 8 years younger than me, six ways from Sunday, I'd get called all three of the above and more. But Andrew- I love you sweetie and I am sorry I am talking negatively about you- will be 30 years old in less than 3 months and can date and screw a 22 year old (if the current SO is who I think it is) and nothing is said. That isn't fair. What the fuck, people? If it's dirty and disgusting if I do it, then it's dirty and disgusting if Andrew does it. No double standards.
If this is ever confirmed by one or the other, the 1D fans will lose their fucking minds. It will be HYSTERICAL what will get thrown at Taylor. This fan base interests me so much that I wish I could do a sociological study on them. Some of this stuff I have seen tweeted at the boys' real Twitter accounts.....how do these people have the backbones and gall to say this stuff out loud? It's one thing to think it in your mind, or say it out loud to your friends, but back off with saying it directly to the person. Or the person's significant other. Or family. Whatever.
And Harry, sweetheart, RUN. RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN.
And to make up for my bad mouthing, I am going to go stare at a 9 picture block of Andrew for the next 10 minutes. Penance, and all that. I like that middle picture at the top. He has such a pleasant smile. And the one below it is adorable. I wish I could remember where I seen a larger version of it. Even the cat looks like, who is this astonishing gorgeous creature puckering up to me? And here is a larger version of the one next to the kitty picture (that hair. THAT HAIR. Those waves and curls. I want to run my fingers through them). And then I have to go watch multiple viewings of their performance of "I Found A Whistle" from MTV's World Stage while I, as well as my ovaries, weep at his beauty. *sniffs* WHY IS HE SO GORGEOUS?!
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
Election Day Y'all!
Did everyone vote? I did. Cast my ballot a little before 3:00PM.
7:48PM: I know it's election night, but why could Fox not play the Simpsons and then cover the election? Gosh!
8:15PM: Completely off topic, but....sounds like someone is on the rag again:
Louis Tomlinson: People who say I'm in a gay relationship with Harry Styles aren't real One Direction fans
Look, I don't fault him for his frustration at the fans who have said nasty things towards his "girlfriend" and family, but he really doesn't know how to SHUT THE FUCK UP, does he? Listen, Louis, I have some advice for you- don't piss off your fans. In addition to that fat British asshole who created the group, your fans made you, and they can easily break you. And this is exactly what you are going to do by saying this. And don't say that you don't care, because I would like to hear you say that in a couple years (is that too generous?) when your popularity has bottomed out and you're fucking dirt poor. You're not the first, and you will not be the last, celebrity to get this harassment. If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen. Plus, with the way kids are today, I wouldn't put it past any of them to get pissed off enough to actually resort to violence.
He should take lessons from Harry. That boy never creates trouble. Because he is a flawless little prince (it must have something to do with being born on February 1st). And look at him in that article picture. Gorgeous, but he has a punchable face. He has the kind of face I want to punch, and then make out with. Or maybe make out with and then punch. Or punch, make out, and then punch again. And his ass! Mother of God, that boy has one ass on him. I saw a picture of him in a *drools* wetsuit and he was standing from the side and his ass was like WHOA. I think I stared at the picture for 10 minutes trying to fathom how a boy could have such an ample rear on him. He also looks like he is expecting in that picture, which I thought was funny because he normally looks pretty thin in clothes. And look at it in the second picture here. Wow. DAT ASS. Not average indeed. That ass is SCREAMING for a spanking. But I am getting off topic here. Besides, not everyone thinks he is in a relationship with Harry. I just think he is gay. Methinks the lady doth protest too much. He's like a real life Wally Terzinsky. And you know what? If he really is gay and is having a fake relationship*, then he should be ashamed of himself. And his girlfriend should be ashamed of herself for feeding into the lies.
*basing this on the assumption that he is not NOT okay with his sexuality. If he is not, then that is a whole other story, because no one should be forced out of the closet if they are not ready.
Dear Lord, I hope my favorite ONTD Louis-hating member roguedandelion responds to the article. His (yes, I finally confirmed it is male) hatred of Louis is golden.
8:40PM: Michigan Man Dies At Polls, Comes Back To Life To Vote
The hell?
10:00PM: Having a dumb moment here. Did Obama take Jersey or it hasn't been confirmed?
10:21PM: These electoral maps are giving me a headache. And I can't help but wonder- who did my king vote for? Did he vote? Andrew? ANDREW! Did you vote?!
10:26PM: A screenshot of a retweet from Andrew's daddy. And another. Same tweet, different comment. Sounds like Andrew may come from a fairly liberal family. His attitude towards things puts me in the mind of someone is pretty liberal, although I have had plenty of wrong impressions of people before. He's said before his parents were hippies, and I have never seen a conservative hippy, so....oh well. Just another thing to add to his list of awesomeness. His old man seems pretty cool. Guess Andrew had to get it from somewhere. And his dad is so proud of him. It makes me laugh, in a good way. I'd be pretty damn proud if he was my son, too.
10:34PM: ALL OF THE BLUE IN THE NORTHEAST. IT'S SO GLORIOUS! *sobs*
11:01PM: Huffpo has Obama at 244 electoral votes.
11:18PM: My mother just ran into the room screaming "HE WON! HE WON!", hugged me, and then she burst into tears.
7:48PM: I know it's election night, but why could Fox not play the Simpsons and then cover the election? Gosh!
8:15PM: Completely off topic, but....sounds like someone is on the rag again:
Louis Tomlinson: People who say I'm in a gay relationship with Harry Styles aren't real One Direction fans
Look, I don't fault him for his frustration at the fans who have said nasty things towards his "girlfriend" and family, but he really doesn't know how to SHUT THE FUCK UP, does he? Listen, Louis, I have some advice for you- don't piss off your fans. In addition to that fat British asshole who created the group, your fans made you, and they can easily break you. And this is exactly what you are going to do by saying this. And don't say that you don't care, because I would like to hear you say that in a couple years (is that too generous?) when your popularity has bottomed out and you're fucking dirt poor. You're not the first, and you will not be the last, celebrity to get this harassment. If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen. Plus, with the way kids are today, I wouldn't put it past any of them to get pissed off enough to actually resort to violence.
He should take lessons from Harry. That boy never creates trouble. Because he is a flawless little prince (it must have something to do with being born on February 1st). And look at him in that article picture. Gorgeous, but he has a punchable face. He has the kind of face I want to punch, and then make out with. Or maybe make out with and then punch. Or punch, make out, and then punch again. And his ass! Mother of God, that boy has one ass on him. I saw a picture of him in a *drools* wetsuit and he was standing from the side and his ass was like WHOA. I think I stared at the picture for 10 minutes trying to fathom how a boy could have such an ample rear on him. He also looks like he is expecting in that picture, which I thought was funny because he normally looks pretty thin in clothes. And look at it in the second picture here. Wow. DAT ASS. Not average indeed. That ass is SCREAMING for a spanking. But I am getting off topic here. Besides, not everyone thinks he is in a relationship with Harry. I just think he is gay. Methinks the lady doth protest too much. He's like a real life Wally Terzinsky. And you know what? If he really is gay and is having a fake relationship*, then he should be ashamed of himself. And his girlfriend should be ashamed of herself for feeding into the lies.
*basing this on the assumption that he is not NOT okay with his sexuality. If he is not, then that is a whole other story, because no one should be forced out of the closet if they are not ready.
Dear Lord, I hope my favorite ONTD Louis-hating member roguedandelion responds to the article. His (yes, I finally confirmed it is male) hatred of Louis is golden.
8:40PM: Michigan Man Dies At Polls, Comes Back To Life To Vote
The hell?
10:00PM: Having a dumb moment here. Did Obama take Jersey or it hasn't been confirmed?
10:21PM: These electoral maps are giving me a headache. And I can't help but wonder- who did my king vote for? Did he vote? Andrew? ANDREW! Did you vote?!
10:26PM: A screenshot of a retweet from Andrew's daddy. And another. Same tweet, different comment. Sounds like Andrew may come from a fairly liberal family. His attitude towards things puts me in the mind of someone is pretty liberal, although I have had plenty of wrong impressions of people before. He's said before his parents were hippies, and I have never seen a conservative hippy, so....oh well. Just another thing to add to his list of awesomeness. His old man seems pretty cool. Guess Andrew had to get it from somewhere. And his dad is so proud of him. It makes me laugh, in a good way. I'd be pretty damn proud if he was my son, too.
10:34PM: ALL OF THE BLUE IN THE NORTHEAST. IT'S SO GLORIOUS! *sobs*
11:01PM: Huffpo has Obama at 244 electoral votes.
11:18PM: My mother just ran into the room screaming "HE WON! HE WON!", hugged me, and then she burst into tears.
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Random Thoughts
Good news- I am not feeling as shitty as my last post. Man, I don't know what the hell was up my ass that night. I was really feeling bad. I didn't end up going to the party, and not shockingly, I am feeling shitty about not going. There are times I start worrying that I could be sociopathic, but I think the amount of guilt and remorse I feel in a given day is solid proof that I am not. I very much doubt a sociopath could feel guilt and remorse like this.
There is not much I do not feel guilty over- if I respond to someone in a way I did not feel was polite, if I don't say the right thing, if something bad happens, even if it is well out of my control, etc. Back in 2005, when I worked in a billing office, there was a doctor's office on the floor below and one day a man came in wanting to know if the office was open, and he starts telling me how his wife was just diagnosed with cancer and I don't remember what I said to him and while I don't recall being rude, I don't think I was sympathetic. More I was just shocked that this complete stranger was sharing with me, another complete stranger, of his wife's illness. But I still feel guilty that I was not more sympathetic to him.
I blame myself for pretty much everything that has went wrong in my life, including developing mental illness. Which for someone who is adamant about not having mental illness portrayed in a negative light anymore, it is a piss poor attitude towards it. I want for society to stop blaming mentally ill people for their illnesses, that it is as much of a real disease as cancer, yet I blame myself for my illness. Illnesses. Whatever.
I read an article over on Cracked about movie stereotypes and one was about disabilities in movies. How death seems to be preferred over being disabled. And that disabled people got all butt-hurt over it. Not that it takes much to butt-hurt people nowadays, especially some disabled people. I remember I read a blog a few years ago by a disabled woman and man, did she bitch a lot. But that isn't important. Look, maybe some people can overcome their disability and all that, but some just can't. I've already made it clear to most people in my life that should a time ever come in my life where I am faced with multiple limb amputation or death, do me the favor of death. I'll be damned to spend a life like that. And huzzah for you if you can do it. I can't. And frankly, a person's choice of wanting death over disability does not affect another disabled person's life.
I read Blind Gossip on a daily basis, mostly for the fun of it, because blind items are always to be taken with a grain of salt. But as soon as I saw this one today, I knew a big storm would be coming. Because Louis was the first person I thought of. And sure enough, the storm of Larry fans did not disappoint. WOW. I really don't know whether to be horrified or laugh, because some of it is pretty damn hilarious. I honestly think there is a very good chance Louis could be gay. I know it's bad to stereotype, but that kid's mannerism just screams GAY. I watched a video of him talking about his parents' divorce and I'm like there is no way in hell this kid is not gay. He's so effeminate! Plus I always have to LOL at how every interview with him I have read, he always has to make just a little too many references to his "girlfriend Eleanor". Like why do you have to keep mentioning it? We know Eleanor is your girlfriend*. We know you are dating* her. There is no reason to keep repeating yourself. Unless you are desperately trying to prove something.
*quotations may or may not be needed here
I don't necessarily believe he's with Harry, though. I don't know if Harry is gay. He puts me in the mind of someone who really has no sexual preference, who would be with someone because they make him happy, man or woman. I think Harry is just someone who loves people in general. He'd love you regardless of gender, race, physical appearance, etc, etc.
But these people really need to chill the fuck out. I'm actually starting to feel sorry for the kid, and I really don't want to. The whole management thing does sound like some crazy tinfoil hat conspiracy, but I also do not doubt that it is very possible for PR to pull stunts like that. And if people are forcing a young man to hide his sexuality, this is just beyond cruel. It is heart-breaking. No one should ever have to hide his or her sexuality. If I found out my son was being forced to hide his sexuality for PR, I would hunt down Simon Cowell and shoot him.
But maybe it just simply is he is gay and hasn't accepted it. The kid is almost 21 years old . That does not mean he is completely sure of his sexuality. I'm almost 29 years old and I still have no concept of my sexuality, whether I am straight or bisexual, although I am fine with whatever it ends up being. Maybe he can't, or is not ready to accept it. But the way some Larry fans are acting, it's not going to help. You can't demand for someone to come out of the closet if he or she is not ready to do so. Knowing that fans will still support you can help, although will they support him if he is NOT dating Harry? And sure, it may help a fan who is having trouble accepting his or her own homosexuality. But it doesn't mean he still will be willing to accept that it is who he is. Or maybe there are people in his family who aren't okay with gay people. Who knows? We don't.
This is all hypothetically speaking, of course. I am in no way saying he definitely is. I don't need psycho fans or the princess himself coming after me.
I won't lie- I do look forward to hearing more on this. And the term "beard" makes me giggle.
I went to the Cheesecake Factory on Saturday and after an hour plus wait, we were finally seated. And I discovered my favorite meal, the ginormous grilled cheese, is not on the menu anymore. I was still able to get it, but I am so tired of every meal I like being taken off of the menu at restaurants. And grilled cheese is pretty much the simplest meal in history, so why get rid of it? I've had their pulled pork sandwich before and enjoyed it, but it would have been overwhelming at eight at night. I had their pumpkin cheesecake for the first time and oh my god, was it good.
And speaking of pumpkin, I need a pumpkin pie Blizzard fix soon.
ETA 10/17: Another BI went up yesterday. Why people are questioning this one as a different one makes no sense, when it clearly is a continuation of the first one.
Oh lord....if this happens, Tumblr, and Larry fans, will fucking EXPLODE.
ETA 10/23: Oh mama.
LOL AWWWW. Wuv. Twue wuv. If I didn't know who these two were, just two random guys taking a picture at what looks like an airport, I'd definitely think they were a couple.
And this: 1D's Louis Tomlinson hosts charity football, looks great in uniform
Cheesus, him in that uniform....damn. I would. I so would. And I would hate myself every second of it. And great. Now I am all riled up and thinking of this picture as well.
ETA 11/11: Odd. That last blind item disappeared. After Bieber and Selena broke up. So I guess that one was probably about them?
There is not much I do not feel guilty over- if I respond to someone in a way I did not feel was polite, if I don't say the right thing, if something bad happens, even if it is well out of my control, etc. Back in 2005, when I worked in a billing office, there was a doctor's office on the floor below and one day a man came in wanting to know if the office was open, and he starts telling me how his wife was just diagnosed with cancer and I don't remember what I said to him and while I don't recall being rude, I don't think I was sympathetic. More I was just shocked that this complete stranger was sharing with me, another complete stranger, of his wife's illness. But I still feel guilty that I was not more sympathetic to him.
I blame myself for pretty much everything that has went wrong in my life, including developing mental illness. Which for someone who is adamant about not having mental illness portrayed in a negative light anymore, it is a piss poor attitude towards it. I want for society to stop blaming mentally ill people for their illnesses, that it is as much of a real disease as cancer, yet I blame myself for my illness. Illnesses. Whatever.
I read an article over on Cracked about movie stereotypes and one was about disabilities in movies. How death seems to be preferred over being disabled. And that disabled people got all butt-hurt over it. Not that it takes much to butt-hurt people nowadays, especially some disabled people. I remember I read a blog a few years ago by a disabled woman and man, did she bitch a lot. But that isn't important. Look, maybe some people can overcome their disability and all that, but some just can't. I've already made it clear to most people in my life that should a time ever come in my life where I am faced with multiple limb amputation or death, do me the favor of death. I'll be damned to spend a life like that. And huzzah for you if you can do it. I can't. And frankly, a person's choice of wanting death over disability does not affect another disabled person's life.
I read Blind Gossip on a daily basis, mostly for the fun of it, because blind items are always to be taken with a grain of salt. But as soon as I saw this one today, I knew a big storm would be coming. Because Louis was the first person I thought of. And sure enough, the storm of Larry fans did not disappoint. WOW. I really don't know whether to be horrified or laugh, because some of it is pretty damn hilarious. I honestly think there is a very good chance Louis could be gay. I know it's bad to stereotype, but that kid's mannerism just screams GAY. I watched a video of him talking about his parents' divorce and I'm like there is no way in hell this kid is not gay. He's so effeminate! Plus I always have to LOL at how every interview with him I have read, he always has to make just a little too many references to his "girlfriend Eleanor". Like why do you have to keep mentioning it? We know Eleanor is your girlfriend*. We know you are dating* her. There is no reason to keep repeating yourself. Unless you are desperately trying to prove something.
*quotations may or may not be needed here
I don't necessarily believe he's with Harry, though. I don't know if Harry is gay. He puts me in the mind of someone who really has no sexual preference, who would be with someone because they make him happy, man or woman. I think Harry is just someone who loves people in general. He'd love you regardless of gender, race, physical appearance, etc, etc.
But these people really need to chill the fuck out. I'm actually starting to feel sorry for the kid, and I really don't want to. The whole management thing does sound like some crazy tinfoil hat conspiracy, but I also do not doubt that it is very possible for PR to pull stunts like that. And if people are forcing a young man to hide his sexuality, this is just beyond cruel. It is heart-breaking. No one should ever have to hide his or her sexuality. If I found out my son was being forced to hide his sexuality for PR, I would hunt down Simon Cowell and shoot him.
But maybe it just simply is he is gay and hasn't accepted it. The kid is almost 21 years old . That does not mean he is completely sure of his sexuality. I'm almost 29 years old and I still have no concept of my sexuality, whether I am straight or bisexual, although I am fine with whatever it ends up being. Maybe he can't, or is not ready to accept it. But the way some Larry fans are acting, it's not going to help. You can't demand for someone to come out of the closet if he or she is not ready to do so. Knowing that fans will still support you can help, although will they support him if he is NOT dating Harry? And sure, it may help a fan who is having trouble accepting his or her own homosexuality. But it doesn't mean he still will be willing to accept that it is who he is. Or maybe there are people in his family who aren't okay with gay people. Who knows? We don't.
This is all hypothetically speaking, of course. I am in no way saying he definitely is. I don't need psycho fans or the princess himself coming after me.
I won't lie- I do look forward to hearing more on this. And the term "beard" makes me giggle.
I went to the Cheesecake Factory on Saturday and after an hour plus wait, we were finally seated. And I discovered my favorite meal, the ginormous grilled cheese, is not on the menu anymore. I was still able to get it, but I am so tired of every meal I like being taken off of the menu at restaurants. And grilled cheese is pretty much the simplest meal in history, so why get rid of it? I've had their pulled pork sandwich before and enjoyed it, but it would have been overwhelming at eight at night. I had their pumpkin cheesecake for the first time and oh my god, was it good.
And speaking of pumpkin, I need a pumpkin pie Blizzard fix soon.
ETA 10/17: Another BI went up yesterday. Why people are questioning this one as a different one makes no sense, when it clearly is a continuation of the first one.
Oh lord....if this happens, Tumblr, and Larry fans, will fucking EXPLODE.
ETA 10/23: Oh mama.
LOL AWWWW. Wuv. Twue wuv. If I didn't know who these two were, just two random guys taking a picture at what looks like an airport, I'd definitely think they were a couple.
And this: 1D's Louis Tomlinson hosts charity football, looks great in uniform
Cheesus, him in that uniform....damn. I would. I so would. And I would hate myself every second of it. And great. Now I am all riled up and thinking of this picture as well.
ETA 11/11: Odd. That last blind item disappeared. After Bieber and Selena broke up. So I guess that one was probably about them?
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
The WTF/Disturbing Post Of The Day
Tumblr
What in the hell is that? Is Harry PREGNANT? How....how is that even possible? And why isn't Louis the baby mama? No. The idea of a pregnant hormonal Louis is frightening. I can see it now- Louis with one of his many beanie hats on and a maternity shirt- horizontally striped, of course- covering a big belly. And suspenders. We can't forget the suspenders. "Harry! Harry! HARRY?! Why don't you tell me I am pretty? I'm pretty, aren't I? You don't think I'm pretty! You hate me! You hate me and you hate our baby! This is bullshit!" "Yes, Louis, of course I think you are gorgeous!" "You are just saying it to be nice! Look at me! I'm hideous! I'm a big fat cow! Don't look at me!". I don't even want to imagine the birth scene*.
*We'll just ignore the whole "he has a penis and not a vagina therefore it would be completely impossible for him to give birth" thing. Dear God, that would be a beautiful child. Harry is so stinking adorable and while Louis may be an ass, he is freaking beautiful. He really is. I mean, not Andrew VanWyngarden beautiful. That is just a whole other level of beauty. There is no comparison. Every time I watch this video, I want to fall on my knees and weep at Andrew's beauty. But Louis...damn. Just look at him. Look at his eyes. His eyes are gorgeous. His eyelashes are unreal. I have freaky long ass lashes, but mine aren't even that long.
Sometimes it's nice to know there are more disturbing people in the world than me.
ETA 10/12: Um....yeah:
Oh No They Didn't!
Oh god. I am dying at the royal wedding picture. I was about to ask why Liam is the Maid Of Honor and not Princess Louis, but then I realized that the picture was probably made by a Larry stan; therefore, Harry is more than likely marrying the latter.
What in the hell is that? Is Harry PREGNANT? How....how is that even possible? And why isn't Louis the baby mama? No. The idea of a pregnant hormonal Louis is frightening. I can see it now- Louis with one of his many beanie hats on and a maternity shirt- horizontally striped, of course- covering a big belly. And suspenders. We can't forget the suspenders. "Harry! Harry! HARRY?! Why don't you tell me I am pretty? I'm pretty, aren't I? You don't think I'm pretty! You hate me! You hate me and you hate our baby! This is bullshit!" "Yes, Louis, of course I think you are gorgeous!" "You are just saying it to be nice! Look at me! I'm hideous! I'm a big fat cow! Don't look at me!". I don't even want to imagine the birth scene*.
*We'll just ignore the whole "he has a penis and not a vagina therefore it would be completely impossible for him to give birth" thing. Dear God, that would be a beautiful child. Harry is so stinking adorable and while Louis may be an ass, he is freaking beautiful. He really is. I mean, not Andrew VanWyngarden beautiful. That is just a whole other level of beauty. There is no comparison. Every time I watch this video, I want to fall on my knees and weep at Andrew's beauty. But Louis...damn. Just look at him. Look at his eyes. His eyes are gorgeous. His eyelashes are unreal. I have freaky long ass lashes, but mine aren't even that long.
Sometimes it's nice to know there are more disturbing people in the world than me.
ETA 10/12: Um....yeah:
Oh No They Didn't!
Oh god. I am dying at the royal wedding picture. I was about to ask why Liam is the Maid Of Honor and not Princess Louis, but then I realized that the picture was probably made by a Larry stan; therefore, Harry is more than likely marrying the latter.
Saturday, October 6, 2012
Random Thoughts
So far still good. I am still disappointed in losing those 11 files. I did get about 7 of them back, but I can't remember what the addresses were of the rest. I've had to reinstall a few programs. I'm still very highly agitated with my computer, though. If I wasn't such an internet addict, I'd be giving it the silent treatment. And I am angry at myself for being too lazy to back-up those files. I'm always good about that. And it had to happen right after my weekly online back-up.
And due to being so stressed, as well as hormones, I have immense heartburn. I feel like if I were to lay down on my stomach, my esophagus would burn right through my chest. I feel like I have a lump in the back of my throat, pain in my back, my mouth tastes really bitter, and I feel violently hungry. Like I could eat an entire buffet. I went to Maggiano's for dinner on Thursday and that certainly did not help. Enjoyed my dinner, though. Their eggplant parm and spaghetti are awesome. Plus, you get a second meal to take home. All for $12.95. And I had my first pumpkin pie Blizzard of the month. I was quite pleased that day.
My mother and I ran to the mall earlier and I decided to stop in FYE and I ended up buying both of MGMT's CDs, Oracular Spectacular for $6.99 (it was used) and Congratulations for $9.99. So now I finally own them. Too bad Congratulations wasn't used. They were running a buy one used, get the second half off. And don't get me wrong, I am glad to finally own them, but I suffering from major buyer's remorse. I generally always do when it comes to buying anything. It's annoying.
My mother was singing along with "The Youth" and "Electric Feel" in the car. And the keyboard part in "Time To Pretend". She loves that part. I think I have created a fan.
And speaking of them:
So then none of those pages I have liked are really them. They seemed kind of legitimate, but I never really was sure. Didn't realize they'd be so unhappy about it. Or whoever really wrote the status. Whoops. Guess I should go unlike the ones on my list. But I'm too lazy.
I always imagined MGMT's fan base would be more mature than a lot of other fan bases, but damn, some of their fans are almost as bad as Bieber's and One Direction's. Of course, I realized all of this after Musikfest, when people were losing their shit over them not playing "Kids", and people losing their shit over the people losing their shit over them not playing "Kids". And oh, what a surprise! The pattern still continues to indicate that the ones that suck are all the same ages as the nutcases in the latter two. Well, the horrible MGMT fans don't attack the band like the latter two, although I have heard of people dissing Ben, but haven't ever saw it with my own eyes. Mostly just each other. There are times that I'd like to make remarks to other fans, particularly about not acting so stupid. And the ones that claim Andrew is their soul mate. Yeah. In your dreams, girls. He wouldn't marry someone like you. But that's a whole other story. I understand people's points about getting gorgeous people when you are famous, but I look at it like this- if these people wouldn't give you the time of day if you were not famous, they are not worth your time.
Not that attacking the band is any better. Attacking the band still makes no sense to me.
And I might be a little biased in this saying, but I don't understand making fun of the 1D boys. Make fun of their music, sure, but other than that, they are harmless. Well, except for Louis. I laugh when people make fun of him (well, outside of the gay jokes, although they can be pretty funny sometimes). He is not "sassy". He's a little bitch. I want to grab a hold of his suspenders and then let go of them and allow them to slap against his body. He's the kind of guy I'd like to bitch slap around and then have hate sex with*. But the rest of them are okay. They don't seem to be cocky. And I watched a video one time of Harry crying over some of the things people say about him and while a part of me wants to say "sorry honey that is what comes with fame", now I feel like I am kicking kittens if I make a joke about him. How can you make fun of that face? It's nice to hear someone actually be honest about how negative comments affect them, instead of being like most "badass" celebrities with their "fuck the haters" and the like, when we all know it really does bother them. Please. Celebrities are incredibly insecure.
*followed by serious regret in the morning
And due to being so stressed, as well as hormones, I have immense heartburn. I feel like if I were to lay down on my stomach, my esophagus would burn right through my chest. I feel like I have a lump in the back of my throat, pain in my back, my mouth tastes really bitter, and I feel violently hungry. Like I could eat an entire buffet. I went to Maggiano's for dinner on Thursday and that certainly did not help. Enjoyed my dinner, though. Their eggplant parm and spaghetti are awesome. Plus, you get a second meal to take home. All for $12.95. And I had my first pumpkin pie Blizzard of the month. I was quite pleased that day.
My mother and I ran to the mall earlier and I decided to stop in FYE and I ended up buying both of MGMT's CDs, Oracular Spectacular for $6.99 (it was used) and Congratulations for $9.99. So now I finally own them. Too bad Congratulations wasn't used. They were running a buy one used, get the second half off. And don't get me wrong, I am glad to finally own them, but I suffering from major buyer's remorse. I generally always do when it comes to buying anything. It's annoying.
My mother was singing along with "The Youth" and "Electric Feel" in the car. And the keyboard part in "Time To Pretend". She loves that part. I think I have created a fan.
And speaking of them:
So then none of those pages I have liked are really them. They seemed kind of legitimate, but I never really was sure. Didn't realize they'd be so unhappy about it. Or whoever really wrote the status. Whoops. Guess I should go unlike the ones on my list. But I'm too lazy.
I always imagined MGMT's fan base would be more mature than a lot of other fan bases, but damn, some of their fans are almost as bad as Bieber's and One Direction's. Of course, I realized all of this after Musikfest, when people were losing their shit over them not playing "Kids", and people losing their shit over the people losing their shit over them not playing "Kids". And oh, what a surprise! The pattern still continues to indicate that the ones that suck are all the same ages as the nutcases in the latter two. Well, the horrible MGMT fans don't attack the band like the latter two, although I have heard of people dissing Ben, but haven't ever saw it with my own eyes. Mostly just each other. There are times that I'd like to make remarks to other fans, particularly about not acting so stupid. And the ones that claim Andrew is their soul mate. Yeah. In your dreams, girls. He wouldn't marry someone like you. But that's a whole other story. I understand people's points about getting gorgeous people when you are famous, but I look at it like this- if these people wouldn't give you the time of day if you were not famous, they are not worth your time.
Not that attacking the band is any better. Attacking the band still makes no sense to me.
And I might be a little biased in this saying, but I don't understand making fun of the 1D boys. Make fun of their music, sure, but other than that, they are harmless. Well, except for Louis. I laugh when people make fun of him (well, outside of the gay jokes, although they can be pretty funny sometimes). He is not "sassy". He's a little bitch. I want to grab a hold of his suspenders and then let go of them and allow them to slap against his body. He's the kind of guy I'd like to bitch slap around and then have hate sex with*. But the rest of them are okay. They don't seem to be cocky. And I watched a video one time of Harry crying over some of the things people say about him and while a part of me wants to say "sorry honey that is what comes with fame", now I feel like I am kicking kittens if I make a joke about him. How can you make fun of that face? It's nice to hear someone actually be honest about how negative comments affect them, instead of being like most "badass" celebrities with their "fuck the haters" and the like, when we all know it really does bother them. Please. Celebrities are incredibly insecure.
*followed by serious regret in the morning
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Random Thoughts
I completely regret my last post. See what I mean? I have not felt good since Monday and I'll give you one guess what immediately popped into my head. I'm tired, nauseous, feeling very off balance, and am having mid-cycle bleeding. Now all I keep wondering is, what if this bad feeling gets worse? What if I jinxed myself bringing up Addison's the other day, that if I had it, it would more than likely be apparent? What if it is deciding to become apparent now, since I brought it up? What if I am jinxing myself just merely talking about right now? It's a never-ending cycle!
And thanks to not feeling good, it has me in a pretty foul mood this week. There was a story on the news on Tuesday about a man who openly admitted to having a favorite child. My sister had been over earlier in the day and as usual my mother was all over her and nagging on me, and it left me in a bad mood, so I said "well, at least some people are honest about having a favorite", although when I said it, I hadn't really meant it to be directed at my mother. I was just crabby and nitpicking everything in sight. But she immediately got mad and said "don't ever say anything like that again; I do not have a favorite". Any parent who is angry over this should shut the hell up, because I guarantee there are plenty of parents out there who have a favorite child. Just like there are probably plenty of parents who regret having children.
I have been off the wall the past few days. The stupidest things are sending me over the edge. My sister shot me a message the other day on Facebook asking me if I would want to go to dinner on Thursday and I burst into tears. Why? Because I immediately panicked at gaining weight. I don't know what is worse- obsessing that there is something wrong with me, or obsessing over gaining weight. It was nice when I wasn't so concerned about my weight. I'm just so afraid that if I just let loose a little too much, I'll lose all self-control and all the weight I lost will come back.
A few weeks ago, I was home alone and the phone rang and it was some strange name and number, so I didn't answer. When the answering machine came on, it was some lawfirm calling for my father about a disability claim. I was like huh? Apparently, my father decided to apply for SS disability, because someone told him that he would get more money than what he gets from retirement. Which is true. And my dad is in pretty shitty shape, although most of his problems are due to being fat. But he is retired. He is already not working. There is no reason for him to get SS disability when someone who has to work, but cannot, could be getting it. I was so fucking pissed off when I found this out. And thank god my sister completely agrees with me. Way to play the system, old man. Just like all the welfare abusers you bitch about.
I don't know how people can abuse government aid. I feel horribly guilty being on unemployment.
So it wasn't that bad when I went up to the library the other day. I did not feel like I was being judged. But, um....I think I have gotten the One Direction infection. The CD is really good. I mean, it's pretty generic pop, and several songs reminded me of other pop songs, but I enjoyed it. Aside from the 3 songs I already knew ("What Makes You Beautiful", "One Thing" and "More Than This"), I am really smitten with "Stole My Heart" and "Tell Me A Lie".
And since he has become a big topic over on ONTD and other sites due to his recent break-up, let's talk about Liam. I have said many times that I just think Harry is adorable. He is very squeeable, but it's completely nonsexual. It's not even just his age, it's his face. He is way too baby-faced for me to ever think about sexually. If you showed me a picture of Harry from the neck down*, I'd be fap fap fapping, but then show me his face and I'd immediately be turned off and be all OH GOD WHY. And Louis, the only one I don't feel bad thinking sexual thoughts about, is good looking in most pictures, but is such an insufferable queen it cancels out any of the hotness. And the more I see him, the less I will be shocked if he ever pops up on a magazine with the words "I AM GAY" in giant letters**. But Liam? He seems like a sweet kid. And he is clearly the best looking one in the group. Very, very good-looking, that boy is (I love that ONTD member; not sure if it's a male or female, although I am think the former, but whatever it is, he or she is hilarious when it comes to Liam). Another curly-headed beauty. In fact, forget getting a picture of Harry and Andrew together. Someone get Liam and Andrew in a picture together and OH GOD TOO MUCH BEAUTY.
*problem is, the boy apparently has 4 nipples, so I would know who it was even if I didn't see a face
**I need to stop making gay jokes at him, because I will feel really awful if he ever did come out
And thanks to not feeling good, it has me in a pretty foul mood this week. There was a story on the news on Tuesday about a man who openly admitted to having a favorite child. My sister had been over earlier in the day and as usual my mother was all over her and nagging on me, and it left me in a bad mood, so I said "well, at least some people are honest about having a favorite", although when I said it, I hadn't really meant it to be directed at my mother. I was just crabby and nitpicking everything in sight. But she immediately got mad and said "don't ever say anything like that again; I do not have a favorite". Any parent who is angry over this should shut the hell up, because I guarantee there are plenty of parents out there who have a favorite child. Just like there are probably plenty of parents who regret having children.
I have been off the wall the past few days. The stupidest things are sending me over the edge. My sister shot me a message the other day on Facebook asking me if I would want to go to dinner on Thursday and I burst into tears. Why? Because I immediately panicked at gaining weight. I don't know what is worse- obsessing that there is something wrong with me, or obsessing over gaining weight. It was nice when I wasn't so concerned about my weight. I'm just so afraid that if I just let loose a little too much, I'll lose all self-control and all the weight I lost will come back.
A few weeks ago, I was home alone and the phone rang and it was some strange name and number, so I didn't answer. When the answering machine came on, it was some lawfirm calling for my father about a disability claim. I was like huh? Apparently, my father decided to apply for SS disability, because someone told him that he would get more money than what he gets from retirement. Which is true. And my dad is in pretty shitty shape, although most of his problems are due to being fat. But he is retired. He is already not working. There is no reason for him to get SS disability when someone who has to work, but cannot, could be getting it. I was so fucking pissed off when I found this out. And thank god my sister completely agrees with me. Way to play the system, old man. Just like all the welfare abusers you bitch about.
I don't know how people can abuse government aid. I feel horribly guilty being on unemployment.
So it wasn't that bad when I went up to the library the other day. I did not feel like I was being judged. But, um....I think I have gotten the One Direction infection. The CD is really good. I mean, it's pretty generic pop, and several songs reminded me of other pop songs, but I enjoyed it. Aside from the 3 songs I already knew ("What Makes You Beautiful", "One Thing" and "More Than This"), I am really smitten with "Stole My Heart" and "Tell Me A Lie".
And since he has become a big topic over on ONTD and other sites due to his recent break-up, let's talk about Liam. I have said many times that I just think Harry is adorable. He is very squeeable, but it's completely nonsexual. It's not even just his age, it's his face. He is way too baby-faced for me to ever think about sexually. If you showed me a picture of Harry from the neck down*, I'd be fap fap fapping, but then show me his face and I'd immediately be turned off and be all OH GOD WHY. And Louis, the only one I don't feel bad thinking sexual thoughts about, is good looking in most pictures, but is such an insufferable queen it cancels out any of the hotness. And the more I see him, the less I will be shocked if he ever pops up on a magazine with the words "I AM GAY" in giant letters**. But Liam? He seems like a sweet kid. And he is clearly the best looking one in the group. Very, very good-looking, that boy is (I love that ONTD member; not sure if it's a male or female, although I am think the former, but whatever it is, he or she is hilarious when it comes to Liam). Another curly-headed beauty. In fact, forget getting a picture of Harry and Andrew together. Someone get Liam and Andrew in a picture together and OH GOD TOO MUCH BEAUTY.
*problem is, the boy apparently has 4 nipples, so I would know who it was even if I didn't see a face
**I need to stop making gay jokes at him, because I will feel really awful if he ever did come out
Monday, September 24, 2012
Random Thoughts
Well, it's been an interesting weekend. Friday night, the group of us- me, my mom, sister, aunt, grandmom, my mom's friend and my aunt's friend- finally got together again and went to dinner. We went to the new Longhorn in Deptford. Where 99 used to be *sniffs*. You wouldn't even know it was a 99. God, I love Longhorn. And I had a REAL cheeseburger.
Saturday was just a WTF day. It was Irish Weekend down the shore and we usually go. My dad assumed we were going, but never said anything to anyone. And we ended up not going, due to that and due to my mom's car breaking down. My sister refused to offer up her car to go and my mother got mad at her, since they do nothing but drive her places all the time. I got the blunt end of her anger, that parents should be killed when they reach a certain age, and she wishes she could move far away so she doesn't have to deal with anyone anymore (really- do people still wonder why I am so fucked up in the head?). But I ended up just running to some stores, coming home, then running back out later. And having the fun of getting caught in a downpour.
Sunday we decided to go to down the shore for Irish Weekend. And thanks to the cold front moving in on Saturday, it was nice and cool out. It was a nice day overall.
ONTD put up a post on MGMT performing at the Joshua Light Show and I watched a little bit of it on Youtube, and it actually made me feel a little better about not going. Don't get me wrong, I still would have went had I gotten the chance. I honestly knew nothing about the Joshua Light Show, and I was far too lazy to research it, but the show was nothing like I expected. I thought they would be performing their usual songs, but they didn't. There was no singing. Just weird music. It was cool, I won't deny it, but it was one of those artsy shows I would have sat staring at in absolute horror and absolute fascination. I like weird things, but some things I just don't get.
I wonder why Andrew decided to grow his hair out again. I'm certainly not complaining, since he is about the only man I think can pull it off, but he kept it short for a long time. And it's odd to say about someone about to turn 30 years old in a few months, but he's getting so grown up looking! I still want someone to put him and Harry together in a picture so I can finally figure out why he reminds me of Andrew. That would make my day, to see them two together in a picture. Also, they share a birthday. February 1st was apparently a good day.
Picture #10.....dat ass.
Saturday was just a WTF day. It was Irish Weekend down the shore and we usually go. My dad assumed we were going, but never said anything to anyone. And we ended up not going, due to that and due to my mom's car breaking down. My sister refused to offer up her car to go and my mother got mad at her, since they do nothing but drive her places all the time. I got the blunt end of her anger, that parents should be killed when they reach a certain age, and she wishes she could move far away so she doesn't have to deal with anyone anymore (really- do people still wonder why I am so fucked up in the head?). But I ended up just running to some stores, coming home, then running back out later. And having the fun of getting caught in a downpour.
Sunday we decided to go to down the shore for Irish Weekend. And thanks to the cold front moving in on Saturday, it was nice and cool out. It was a nice day overall.
ONTD put up a post on MGMT performing at the Joshua Light Show and I watched a little bit of it on Youtube, and it actually made me feel a little better about not going. Don't get me wrong, I still would have went had I gotten the chance. I honestly knew nothing about the Joshua Light Show, and I was far too lazy to research it, but the show was nothing like I expected. I thought they would be performing their usual songs, but they didn't. There was no singing. Just weird music. It was cool, I won't deny it, but it was one of those artsy shows I would have sat staring at in absolute horror and absolute fascination. I like weird things, but some things I just don't get.
I wonder why Andrew decided to grow his hair out again. I'm certainly not complaining, since he is about the only man I think can pull it off, but he kept it short for a long time. And it's odd to say about someone about to turn 30 years old in a few months, but he's getting so grown up looking! I still want someone to put him and Harry together in a picture so I can finally figure out why he reminds me of Andrew. That would make my day, to see them two together in a picture. Also, they share a birthday. February 1st was apparently a good day.
Picture #10.....dat ass.
Thursday, September 6, 2012
Random MTV Music Awards Thoughts
Have the music awards on right now. One Direction is going to be performing. I can't wait to hear how autotuned they are. They're about the only reason I am watching it. God, they are so freaking adorable. Especially Harry and Liam. I want to punch myself in the face for thinking this.
Okay. Can't hear over all of the incessant obnoxious screaming. STFU, you dumb tweens! Are they going to do anything besides just stand there and/or walk around? Sure, MGMT didn't really do much at their show, but uh, they play instruments. The boy bands in my day (god I sound like such an old person) used to dance like all holy hell. And while I do agree that there is no written law that boy bands have to dance, but well, um, when looks and half-decent singing are all you have....you have to do something.
The rest of the show, I am watching on mute with my iTunes library playing loudly. I'm just going to pretend everyone is lip-synching to my music. New hits or not, MGMT should be there. Why? Have you seen some of the people that are there? Why are they there? And just because MGMT is awesome. And because they are real musicians. And don't base any judgements on two songs. Seriously- look up how much work they put into their music. It's unbelievable. They write and compose all of their music. I think Andrew pretty much writes all of the lyrics.
And then their instrument talent. WHOA:
From OS:
I watched their performance of "Electric Feel" from the 2009 V Fest again last night and I have to say Andrew has definitely improved since then in singing that song. I'm not going to say he was bad, but he definitely sang it better at Musikfest. Their performance of "Brian Eno" was significantly better than when I watched the 2010 Lollapalooza performance of it as well. But either way, I'd rather hear not-so-good live music than lip-synching.
MY KINGS! YOU SHOULD BE THERE!
They're so funny. Andrew looks like an anime character. Ben looks like he is posing for a school picture. And how in the hell tall is Matt anyway? They're all at least close to 5'10, based on how they compare to Andrew, and if that is how tall he really is. And Matt is like a good half foot at least taller. I always wonder if he is really shy or something, because he always seems to be hiding in the back on stage. DON'T HIDE MATT! WE LOVE YOU TOO!
Now....if I had Photoshop, I would put crowns on each of their heads. Andrew would have the biggest, of course. And because I am feeling really randy, that just sounded incredibly dirty.
9:15PM: OMFG HOW IS THIS MUSIC? Lil Wayne, please stop!
9:37PM: I am screaming along with "Metanoia" and I still sound better than most of these people performing. HELP ME! DRUMMER! TICKET! YEAH!
10:03PM: Hang it up, Rihanna, you insufferable cunt. God she makes me sick. She is about the only person on this earth who has less self-respect than me.
1:38AM: I bitched about Lil Wayne on Facebook and I just discovered I do in fact have friends who are fans of him. Nobody has said anything yet, but I swear if anyone makes one negative comment towards MGMT, I will administer an ass-whooping. You do not take the name of them in vain! Then again, I have plenty of friends on FB who hate Lil Wayne and would probably back me up.
Okay. Can't hear over all of the incessant obnoxious screaming. STFU, you dumb tweens! Are they going to do anything besides just stand there and/or walk around? Sure, MGMT didn't really do much at their show, but uh, they play instruments. The boy bands in my day (god I sound like such an old person) used to dance like all holy hell. And while I do agree that there is no written law that boy bands have to dance, but well, um, when looks and half-decent singing are all you have....you have to do something.
The rest of the show, I am watching on mute with my iTunes library playing loudly. I'm just going to pretend everyone is lip-synching to my music. New hits or not, MGMT should be there. Why? Have you seen some of the people that are there? Why are they there? And just because MGMT is awesome. And because they are real musicians. And don't base any judgements on two songs. Seriously- look up how much work they put into their music. It's unbelievable. They write and compose all of their music. I think Andrew pretty much writes all of the lyrics.
And then their instrument talent. WHOA:
From OS:
- Andrew Vanwyngarden – lead vocals, lead and rhythm guitars, keyboards, drums, percussion
- Ben Goldwasser – vocals, keyboards rhythm guitars, percussion, synths and samples
- Andrew VanWyngarden: vocals, guitars, drums (3, 4-7, 9), bass (1-4, 6, 9), synths (2, 3, 6, 8), casio guitar (7), piano (2), fake flute (4), harmonica (6), electric sitar (3, 6), percussion
- Ben Goldwasser: synths and samples (1, 3-9), organ (3-5, 7, 8), piano (4, 8), omnichord (1, 2, 5), numerology (6), additional vocals (2, 4, 7), percussion
- James Richardson: guitars (1, 2, 5-8), synths (2), casio guitar (7), synth drums (8), glockenspiel (2), saxophone (5), pan pipes (6), additional vocals (7), percussion, electric sitar (3)
- Matt Asti: guitars (1, 4, 6), bass (4-7), piano (5), additional vocals (7), field recordings and treatments, percussion
- Will Berman: drums (1, 2, 4), guitars (4, 6), bass (4), additional vocals, percussion, synths
I watched their performance of "Electric Feel" from the 2009 V Fest again last night and I have to say Andrew has definitely improved since then in singing that song. I'm not going to say he was bad, but he definitely sang it better at Musikfest. Their performance of "Brian Eno" was significantly better than when I watched the 2010 Lollapalooza performance of it as well. But either way, I'd rather hear not-so-good live music than lip-synching.
MY KINGS! YOU SHOULD BE THERE!
They're so funny. Andrew looks like an anime character. Ben looks like he is posing for a school picture. And how in the hell tall is Matt anyway? They're all at least close to 5'10, based on how they compare to Andrew, and if that is how tall he really is. And Matt is like a good half foot at least taller. I always wonder if he is really shy or something, because he always seems to be hiding in the back on stage. DON'T HIDE MATT! WE LOVE YOU TOO!
Now....if I had Photoshop, I would put crowns on each of their heads. Andrew would have the biggest, of course. And because I am feeling really randy, that just sounded incredibly dirty.
9:15PM: OMFG HOW IS THIS MUSIC? Lil Wayne, please stop!
9:37PM: I am screaming along with "Metanoia" and I still sound better than most of these people performing. HELP ME! DRUMMER! TICKET! YEAH!
10:03PM: Hang it up, Rihanna, you insufferable cunt. God she makes me sick. She is about the only person on this earth who has less self-respect than me.
1:38AM: I bitched about Lil Wayne on Facebook and I just discovered I do in fact have friends who are fans of him. Nobody has said anything yet, but I swear if anyone makes one negative comment towards MGMT, I will administer an ass-whooping. You do not take the name of them in vain! Then again, I have plenty of friends on FB who hate Lil Wayne and would probably back me up.
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