Random Thoughts

Well, my nephew's first birthday party is done and over with. It was a nice day. Well, not so much the weather (It snowed. Again). My nephew was cranky as shit, though, because he didn't nap. I love that boy to death, but things like that remind me why I don't want children.

Last weekend, I went to one of our farmer's markets with my parents so they could get some supplies for the party today. And while I was there, I happened to see some kid I went to school with. And I actually had a crush on him in sixth grade. Of course, like 99% of the crushes I have had, I look back at it in horror. He was disabled, more than likely what I was attracted to, since I have admitted to having a bit of a fetish for before. Anyway, he happened to turn around at one point and....let's just say he was more disabled than the last time I saw him. And I am absolutely ashamed to admit this, but.....I was fucking horrified. And even worse, I was repulsed. It actually skeeved me out. And I can't stop thinking about it and it's just so repulsive. I can't stand that it won't leave my head, not to mention I feel AWFUL for feeling so horrible about it.

I know, I know. God, I am a horrible person.

I was on MGMT's Twitter page last night and....thirst. So much thirst. Thirst as far as the eye can see. It was freaking embarrassing. And speaking of thirst, one of the fan pages I visit posted a picture of what is supposedly Andrew in his undies and people were freaking out about seeing his penis. And saying he is pretty well endowed. Now I enlarged the picture as big as my iPad would allow (what? I never denied not being thirsty myself), but to be honest, I don't think he is really that big. I'm not saying that as a bad thing, because he looks like he is a nice size. Then again, I won't deny that I don't know what truly would be considered a big penis as opposed to a small one. Besides, the idea of a huge penis inside of me scares the ever loving shit out of me, so even if he is actually what is considered small, what the hell do I care?

When my FWA's friend came to work with pinkeye, my FWA threw a fit and made it all about herself and her damn pregnancy. She started again on Friday about it, that her friend had a lot of nerve coming in to work with pink eye when she knows a pregnant person works there and can't take antibiotics. She's been constantly ranting about getting it and not being able to take antibiotics, so finally I texted my sister and asked her if it's true pregnant women can't take antibiotics. She said nope, they can. I swear, my FWA finds any fucking reason to make everything about her pregnancy. And all she does the whole damn day is walk around rubbing her belly and talking about her pregnancy and I feel like saying JFC we know you're pregnant STFU!

And one day she said something about being on WIC and how she doesn't want to be, but she needs some assistance. No. If you can't afford baby without assistance, then you don't deliberately get pregnant. Just because you WANT a baby doesn't mean you get one when you want it.

I still cannot get over missing that commercial the other day. It still infuriates me. I used to always see it during Too Cute or American Eats and I see it during neither. I even put the Olympics on, since I know the product the commercial is for are sponsors (I actually keep wondering if the Olympics are maybe why I am not seeing it, because it didn't start not showing until they started). And still nothing. I swear, if I ever get to see it again, I am going to miss it again because I am going to pass out from shock.

And sure, thanks to the wonderful world of the internet, I can watch it on Youtube and do, in fact, have it on my favorites list. But I haven't watch it yet because.....I don't know, I feel kind of awkward watching it. Don't ask me to explain, because I don't know why.

And speaking of commercials, I keep seeing commercials for Longhorn and they show the Chocolate Stampede in it and it's making me crave it so bad. All 2430 calories of it. I'm still pissed they got rid of that dessert with the fried cheesecake pieces on top of ice cream with strawberry syrup. It was so good! And I am also debating whether I want to try the Blizzard of the Month (red velvet cake) or not. It looks good, but sounds kind of sweet.

I called the dentist earlier and ended up making an appointment for Monday morning at 9. The girl was so abrupt on the phone (which was surprising, because usually she is fairly nice) and I ended up kind of caving into the appointment. I really want to go as soon as possible, but I am afraid of telling my manager about it. I would still go in to work at normal time and leave like 8:40 or so. But still. I don't know whether to cancel it or just keep it and call my boss before Monday to let her know I made an urgent appointment.

Song Of The Day

 CATCHY CATCHY CATCHY



Last night, Youtube was recommending more videos of Andrew's girlfriend to me. Also, it keeps recommending me these videos of people dressing up like MGMT and covering their songs. STAHP, YOUTUBE. I don't want to hear people's shitty covers of their songs!

Video Of The Day

One of the best scenes from the newer Futurama episodes:



It's funny because I just thought of this scene earlier and was going to look for it on Youtube. Then I got distracted watching another video and completely forgot about looking for it. Then I just went on and it was under "Recommended Videos".

Also, there was a video recommended to me for a behind the scenes photo-shoot....for Andrew's girlfriend. Really, Youtube? Are you TRYING to make me feel worse about myself?

(I'm kidding, folks. No one can make me feel bad about myself but me. And damn, do I do a fine job of that. But ugh, she's just so....cute and perfect.)

Random Thoughts

I read a letter in the NY Daily News a while back that said that it is a good thing young girls cannot serve on juries, as they would probably let the surviving Boston marathon bomber off because they think he is cute. I laughed in horror, because it is true. They probably would. Truthfully, if I had no idea who he was or what he did and someone showed me a picture of him, I'd say hell yeah, he is cute. He looks like this kid Brandon I had a huge crush on my senior year of high school. But being cute cannot make up for the fact that he is a hideous cold-blooded monster.

I was reading an article on my favorite website ever about some lady who said something about not dating black men. Or something like that. I don't remember much, because I zoned out a quarter of the way through. Maybe it's not a polite thing to say, but you know damn well there are plenty of people out there who won't date certain races, whether they admit to it or not. I knew plenty of people in high school who would do such a thing, whether it was only their own race or strictly outside of their own. I will admit that I have a penchant for skinny effeminate white guys with curly brown hair, blue eyes, and extremely little or no facial hair. I loathe facial hair. Last year, I saw a picture of Andrew at some thing in New York and he was way too scruffy....okay maybe he wasn't that bad, but it was still too much. He also looked like he hadn't had a good bath or hair wash in quite some time, leaving me to wonder if those nasty comments about his hygiene are true. And he has a stain on his shirt. I'm not good at reading body language, but even Ben doesn't look like he wants to be near him. Andrew, I love you to death, but come on. Another time I saw a picture of him with somewhat of a mustache and it was the most horrifying thing I have ever seen. And this is someone who is so flawless he can pretty much pull off anything. But not that. This is about the most acceptable amount of facial hair.

God, I love that boy's smile.

And as for girls, brown hair and brown eyes always seems to catch my eye.

I feel like I am on an emotional roller coaster right now. I want to rip my hair out. I want my period to come on just so I feel better. I can't deal with this every month. And birth control doesn't help! I felt even worse suicidal on it. And I still want to have that ultrasound done, but I am so afraid of how bad it will hurt. And that it will show nothing and I'll look nuts once again. It will either show nothing or I'll end up having one of those awful cysts with hair and teeth.

I have come to realize that I am not angry with the best band in the world (plus, I don't think it's their fault, anyway, judging by what I googled on bands and how they get gigs). As usual, the resulting anger is always really at me. Anger that I have no one to do things with and anger that I don't make things happen when I want to do them. And it's also just PMS. Although I have to admit when I seen their tweet after the show and then saw the song rider and saw "The Handshake" on there, I nearly roundhouse kicked my monitor.

I still get so mad that I almost got to hear it live at Musikfest, had it not fricking stormed and delayed the show. I want to hear it live so bad, as well as "Song for Dan Treacy", "Future Reflections", "4th Dimensional Transition", "Someone's Missing", and every "true" fan's favorite, "Kids". And to really be asking for the moon, "Indie Rokkers", "Metanoia", and "Destrokk". And every "true" fan aka the tween girls only in love with Andrew can go suck it if they have a problem with me wanting to hear "Kids". It's still a good song. Hating it doesn't make you a better fan.

Actually, if you are a tween girl, nothing makes you a better anything. You're just awful people. And while the tween girl inside of me would weep- what? he's a good, beautiful man and it's always a sad day when someone like him leaves the market. Don't even ask me to explain why I would cry, because if I knew, I would say why, but this is just one of those things that I myself can't even find or offer an explanation for- I hope one day Andrew and his girlfriend get engaged just so I can watch all these little psychopaths lose their shit on Tumblr.

Truthfully, I don't care what they play; I just want to see them live again. So, so bad. And this time I would like to have the guts to get up and dance when the time comes for it. However, I would be too afraid of  some bonehead recording me, putting it on YouTube, and then I'll end up some infamous YouTube star. Oh god, that would be terrible.

I made a trip to my former workplace with my sister and the baby the other day. Wouldn't you know another girl that works there now is there with her newborn baby? I said that to my sister in the car, that what are the chances the day I decide to visit to show everyone my nephew, someone else has to be there with their brat? And my sister agreed and said she didn't think the girl was too happy about it. I said oh well, she needs to get over it. I don't know who she is or that she popped out a brat or that she would be there the same exact time and day I decide to visit.

So many newborn babies creep me out. I mean, they're cute for their size, but that is about it. They look like aliens. And this girl's baby, every time I looked at him, both of his eyes were in different directions. He reminded me of Opie from Family Guy. I know newborns can't really focus their eyes, but it was still freaking me out. I don't remember my nephew being that creepy and believe me, nephew or not, I would say if he freaked me out. But he didn't. And honestly, when I first saw pictures of him on the internet before I saw him in person, I was a bit hesitant to see him in person. But he looked nothing like the pictures. And now he is so damn cute, I can't stand it. I like babies at this age. They don't talk or walk yet and they laugh at the stupid things I do. One day I was over and had the Music Choice Alt Rock station on and Daft Punk's "Get Lucky" came on and I was sitting in front of him clapping and dancing and he was laughing and smiling. At least someone finds me entertaining.

I went back through some old entries and I remember 2 years ago when I kept talking about That Thing. I still can't bring myself to admit what it was, but it is gone, thank god. It went away not long after my fear of having a stress fracture went away and stayed away. Good riddance.

An Angry Letter To Youtube

Dear Youtube:

If I wanted to watch videos of people covering songs/scenes I like, I would search for videos of people covering songs/scenes I like. Otherwise, stop suggesting it! I do not want to watch people act out favorite movie or cartoon scenes. I do not want to watch the Kooks covering "Kids". I do not want to watch Katy Perry sing "Electric Feel". I do not want to watch some amaetuer who is desperately looking for their 15 minutes of fame cover a song I like. I want to hear the real version of the song. End of story. However, that does not mean I want to watch people's corny homemade videos with whatever song I am searching for playing in the background.

Enough!

Sincerely,
S-Cubed

PS - Why do so many of the videos from MGMT's Vevo page keep popping up under my recommendations? I already favored them!