The WTF Of The Day

17 People Talking About Assassinating The President

Are you kidding me? Are you fucking kidding me? No. NO. This goes for both political parties. These people, the people who wished death on Romney.....you all should be ashamed of yourselves.

Election Day Y'all!

Did everyone vote? I did. Cast my ballot a little before 3:00PM.

7:48PM: I know it's election night, but why could Fox not play the Simpsons and then cover the election? Gosh!

8:15PM: Completely off topic, but....sounds like someone is on the rag again:

Louis Tomlinson: People who say I'm in a gay relationship with Harry Styles aren't real One Direction fans

Look, I don't fault him for his frustration at the fans who have said nasty things towards his "girlfriend" and family, but he really doesn't know how to SHUT THE FUCK UP, does he? Listen, Louis, I have some advice for you- don't piss off your fans. In addition to that fat British asshole who created the group, your fans made you, and they can easily break you. And this is exactly what you are going to do by saying this. And don't say that you don't care, because I would like to hear you say that in a couple years (is that too generous?) when your popularity has bottomed out and you're fucking dirt poor. You're not the first, and you will not be the last, celebrity to get this harassment. If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen. Plus, with the way kids are today, I wouldn't put it past any of them to get pissed off enough to actually resort to violence.

He should take lessons from Harry. That boy never creates trouble. Because he is a flawless little prince (it must have something to do with being born on February 1st). And look at him in that article picture. Gorgeous, but he has a punchable face. He has the kind of face I want to punch, and then make out with. Or maybe make out with and then punch. Or punch, make out, and then punch again. And his ass! Mother of God, that boy has one ass on him. I saw a picture of him in a *drools* wetsuit and he was standing from the side and his ass was like WHOA. I think I stared at the picture for 10 minutes trying to fathom how a boy could have such an ample rear on him. He also looks like he is expecting in that picture, which I thought was funny because he normally looks pretty thin in clothes. And look at it in the second picture here. Wow. DAT ASS. Not average indeed. That ass is SCREAMING for a spanking. But I am getting off topic here. Besides, not everyone thinks he is in a relationship with Harry. I just think he is gay. Methinks the lady doth protest too much. He's like a real life Wally Terzinsky. And you know what? If he really is gay and is having a fake relationship*, then he should be ashamed of himself. And his girlfriend should be ashamed of herself for feeding into the lies.

*basing this on the assumption that he is not NOT okay with his sexuality. If he is not, then that is a whole other story, because no one should be forced out of the closet if they are not ready.

Dear Lord, I hope my favorite ONTD Louis-hating member roguedandelion responds to the article. His (yes, I finally confirmed it is male) hatred of Louis is golden.

8:40PM: Michigan Man Dies At Polls, Comes Back To Life To Vote

The hell?

10:00PM: Having a dumb moment here. Did Obama take Jersey or it hasn't been confirmed?

10:21PM: These electoral maps are giving me a headache. And I can't help but wonder- who did my king vote for? Did he vote? Andrew? ANDREW! Did you vote?!

10:26PM: A screenshot of a retweet from Andrew's daddy. And another. Same tweet, different comment. Sounds like Andrew may come from a fairly liberal family. His attitude towards things puts me in the mind of someone is pretty liberal, although I have had plenty of wrong impressions of people before. He's said before his parents were hippies, and I have never seen a conservative hippy, so....oh well. Just another thing to add to his list of awesomeness. His old man seems pretty cool. Guess Andrew had to get it from somewhere. And his dad is so proud of him. It makes me laugh, in a good way. I'd be pretty damn proud if he was my son, too.

10:34PM: ALL OF THE BLUE IN THE NORTHEAST. IT'S SO GLORIOUS! *sobs*

11:01PM: Huffpo has Obama at 244 electoral votes.

11:18PM: My mother just ran into the room screaming "HE WON! HE WON!", hugged me, and then she burst into tears.

Moronic Quote Of The Day

Fatso from Jersey Shore on Obama's tanning tax:

Obama put a 10% tax on tanning....And I feel like he did that intentionally for us

Good God.

Yes, Snooki, I am 110% sure the President of the United States made sure he put aside his one hundred gazillion different tasks to invoke a tax to purposely make yours and your equally brain dead dopes called friends' lives miserable. Do you even know what a fucking tax is? Tanning is not a necessity. There is no reason it should never have been taxed in the first place.

I can't believe so many people watch this show. I watched 10 seconds of it one night flipping through the TV channels. I lost roughly 472,756 brain cells in that 10 second span of time. Christ, if my mother saw me acting like that on TV, she'd break both of my legs and then she would give me guilt trips to last an entire lifetime. I also came to the conclusion that the Situation dude is probably gay. Caring that much about your appearance and bragging about how many "chicks" you "slept with"....come on. He is compensating for something! If this isn't a here queer get used to it picture, then I am sorely missing something. Look at his nails! They are spiffier than mine! If he doesn't come out of the closet sometime down the line, even if it is many years from now....I will be shocked. He looks so damn proud of himself in that picture, I want to pop a cap in his ass.

I saw his baby picture in a magazine. I have to admit he was pretty freaking cute. He has red overalls on and the first thing I thought of was Stewie Griffin.

Anyway, back to Snooki- please get melanoma and die already, you fucking waste of space.

Quote Of The Day

Barack Obama on Sarah Palin's criticism on the US-Russian nuclear arms reduction pact:

I really have no response. Because last I checked, Sarah Palin’s not much of an expert on nuclear issues.

OH SMACK!

Is she really an expert on anything, besides creating aural holocausts every time she speaks and slaughtering the English language? Good God! She's Bush with more estrogen! Except when Bush was slaughtering the English language, it was funny!

Quote Of The Day

A comment by Tim Irby on the Facebook page "Faulkner University presents an evening with Sarah Palin" (from STFU, Conservatives):

I'd love to come but i'll be busy hanging out with Obama and his death panel at our bi-monthly Marxist luau

Video Of The Day

Hypnobama!

An Angry Letter To The American People

Dear America:

Please stop dragging politics into every fucking conversation. Why must every single article I read, some wiseass has to butt in their 2 cents on something political? If I am reading article on a puppy being flushed down the toilet, I want to read comments on what they think of a puppy being flushed down the toilet, not how Barack Obama is the next Hitler and we are living in 1930's Germany. If I read an article on bathing suits, I want to read comments on bathing suits, not Obama being a socialist. If I read an article on the new iPod, I want to read comments on what people think of the new iPod, not how Bush has destroyed the country. Yes, he did, but that is not the place to discuss it. If I read an article on summer movies, I want to read comments on the movies, not people cursing this political party or that political party. If I am reading an article on how a poor dog is tied to the back of a pick-up truck and drug down the street, I want to read comments on how awful that was, not about baby killers and abortion.

God! SHUT THE FUCK UP!

Sincerely,
A disgruntled American citizen

Random Thoughts VIII

How To Do A Push Up - WikiHow

I like this part:

NEVER do a pushup with your palms flat on the ground, as doing so puts your wrists in a very unnatural position with all your weight on them, which can cause them severe discomfort, strain, and permanent damage

Yet look at the picture of the ambitious looking military dude.

You know, I would start bitching about the crazy ass bitch from California, but I am done. I don't even feel like bitching about Sarah Palin anymore. On a side note, I think I may have just found someone that makes my blood boil more than her.

I just would like to know one thing- why do children with ADHD and a speech impediment need to be on disability? My mother's best friend has osteoarthritis and rheumatoid arthritis and she was denied disability quite a few times. Actually, make it 2 things- I would like to know how this chick has a bad enough "back injury" that she has to be out of work, but can carry 8 babies at one time? Give me a fucking break. My mother had a bad back before she got pregnant with me and when she did, went through hell with her back and she only had one baby and only gained 15 pounds.

Most pages I have been on, it has been equal on responses to this case. I have come across a few defending this stupid cow and it makes me wonder how differently their responses would be if this was a single African-American woman doing this. Or a single lesbian. Or a Democrat/liberal/whatever. Or look at the Duggars- how would the fundie religious right be behaving towards the show if everything was exactly the same....but the family was liberal or black or Hispanic.

What I do want to bitch about is Hilary Duff. Bitch needs a good smack upside her head. I have never seen Faye Dunaway act, but judging by her awards and credits, she already sounds like a much better actress than Duff Stuff (if you can ever call her one). If she wants to pass herself off as mature, she should have either thought long and hard before opening her mouth or just not opened it period. Now people can stand there and say (usually Duff fans) that Faye instigated it, but apparently a lot of people do not realize that when people reach a certain age, the filtering of what they say starts to deteriorate. But its not like what she said was false. Face it, Duff, your "acting" and your "singing" sucks. Your acting even sucked on a silly show like The Andy Milonakis Show. Which is actually a pretty funny show. I just watched it for the first time last night.

But I missed Wonder Showzen, which infuriated me because MTV2 plays it about every 546 days and I was too damn tired to stay up and watch it last night. That show takes "screwed-up" to a whole new level. And that is why I like it so much.

I know there is no pleasing people in this world, but for people like Elizabeth Hasselidiot and most of Fox News and its audience, there is absolutely nothing Obama could do that could please them. If he waved his hand and single handedly fixed the economy, banned abortion and gay marriage, reunited Christianity and state, destroyed Al-Queda, and killed Bin Laden with his bare hands, they would still curse him and find something to bitch about.

Although I suspect why, judging by the date and when I accidently bumped my boobs the other day and I almost tore the door off, I have been ridiculously emotional lately. Normally, watching Animal Cops, I get upset and want to beat the crap out of all the people that get arrested. Over the weekend, though, I watched it and I cried both days I watched it. The first day was the South Africa one and the cop went to get a German Shepherd looking dog and the whole time, the thing cried and it's crying was really getting to me until I finally started to cry. The next day was the Philadelphia one and (no surprise here) the cops took pitbulls out there were being used for fighting and only one was able to be kept alive. But the one that was most aggressive- this thing tore right through the metal cage!- was shown all covered in blood after doing so and despite it's horribly aggressive nature, it just bothered me because the dog didn't ask for that life and thanks to some fucking low lifes, now it had to lose it's life. Grrrrr, I really hate people sometimes.

Random Thoughts

Heavens. Sarah is supposedly already planning to run in 2012. God save us all. Obama, if this does not give you ammunition to do a hell of a good job, I don't know what would. The good news is, though, by 2012, no one can say that Obama has no "executive experience".

The other good news, of course, is just because she enters the race doesn't mean she will actually make candidate. Hopefully some potential candidate will come along and squash her like a bug. Which probably wouldn't take much. One could sit down in a chair, lean back, and snore their head off and would still be better than her. Shit, you could put a zombie up on stage to debate her that just stands there and moans "BRAINS!" and it would still be better and make infinitely more sense than her. But then again.... zombies just make everything better.

I really wish ALL movies and shows would be required to have closed-caption. Between years of blowing the little hairs in my ears to bits with blasting music and eustachian tube trouble, my hearing is not great. It kind of sucks, actually. And one day last week, I had some British movie on- I think it was called Go Now or something- and it was not closed captioned and I could barely understand anything anyone was saying. But I think a lot of it had to do with the British accents, which normally I can understand with no problem, but in this movie, everyone's seemed exceptionally harsh. They all sounded like they were talking with mouths full of shit.

If I do not get a Geno's cheesesteak soon, I am going to scratch someone's eyeballs out.

Since I have no health insurance, I obviously have no dental insurance. Thankfully, though, one of my local community colleges has a dental clinic and I can get my teeth cleaned for next to nothing. It's pretty frickin sweet. Unfortunately, though, due to area (a lot of people with low incomes and people that shouldn't, um, be here) and now probably due to so many people losing health insurance, the clinic is booked up. I can't get an appointment until March 5th, which isn't far away really, but I have to find a job so I will probably run into some conflict.

I may have mentioned this before, but back in high school, I was a band geek. And I complained about band a lot, so why did I stay in it? I don't know. It wasn't marching band I hated in particular. Oh, no. I loved going to competitions and parades and all that jiggery pokery. No. Rather, it was the people I couldn't stand. The members, the teachers, instructors, assistants, etc....all were 100% certified grade-A asshole. My band teacher had a personal vendetta for me from day one. I have no idea what his problem was with me because I never was a trouble maker in school. Far from it. I barely made a peep in class. My teachers- well, most of them anyway- were hounding me to speak up in class because they certainly knew I had the brains to not make an ass out of myself. Maybe that was the problem- I was such NOT a trouble maker, they assumed I must have had something up my sleeve and would rebel.

Goddamn, I am bored.

Random Thoughts

To see if I still had an old jounral in which I bitched about someone I just recently got in contact with again, I read through some old journals (yes, it was in one) and man, I am one fucked up bitch. Seriously- I have some major issues. I bitched about Janey Wilcox from Trading Up and yet I fantasize about being a manipulative bitch like her. Not quite to the extent she was (I don't do blow-jobs), but close enough. My exact words were,

I've had so many bad fantasies- like of posing naked (if I had the body), doing drugs, using men, being a prostitute....just being a bad girl. I want to fuck people over and not feel bad about it.

And you want to tell me that fantasizing about this stuff constantly is a sign of a normal mind? I still do fantasize about it. But then again, I guess I've spent so many years being this goody two-shoes that I'm just starting to get sick and tired of it and want to rebel.

There was also an entry where I complained about Bootie Barker singing "Groove Is In The Hall" and what was my exact response to his singing? "He sings as well as he walks". Yeah, that was probably even a bit low for me, but hey, disabled people are the first ones to say to treat them the same, so that is exactly what I am doing. No different than making fun of someone's height.

Speaking of Trading Up, I amazingly finally finished it. It's not a difficult book to read, although there are times I read through and thought, um, was that really that direly needed to be included; it seemed like a lot of yapping instead of just getting straight to the point. And oy vey, the storylines were all over the place. Janey was a dirty rotten narcisstic whore and did not get absolutely one ounce of the punishment she deserved. That bitch needed to be brought down. The Patty and Mimi storylines dropped off the face of the earth towards the end. What ever became of Mimi's pregnancy? And frankly, I still do not see what Selden (Janey's husband) did that was so awful and that she did not deserve. He gave her everything her shriveled little black heart desired. She got pissed at him for having to choose between her or his job and what was the difference? She didn't even love him! I don't doubt for a second that there are people out there just like these characters, but the only thing that can completely excuse this book is if it was satire. I wonder if the owner who left it on the airplane accidently left it there or was so disgusted they figured they would leave it for someone else.

And need a good drinking game? Read this book and every time someone says darling, take a drink. You won't even be half way through it and you will be dangerously drunk. Or a really good drinking game would be to take a shot every time Janey is a disgusting vile bitch.

Ugh, I was thinking earlier how I miss election time. Yeah, it was nerve-wracking as hell, but it had my mind so occupied that many of the crazy thoughts that normally invade my mind were pushed onto the back burner. I was really caught up in it. I have never seen myself get so passionate over anything in my life. My mother was really caught up in it as well.

So I hear Fatfuck Limbaugh has said that he hopes Obama fails? Good grief. I have never met such a disgusting vile fucking pig in my life as that jerk off. I wish he would go on a hunting trip with Dick Cheney as well or eat himself to death. He is already on a good path for the latter to happen. If I was forced to choose between voting for Sarah Palin or Limbaugh, I think I would just pick up a gun and blow my brains out. Hey, I didn't want Bush in the last election, but I still hoped he would at least pull the country back together.

And last but not least....pictures of Clive Owen with no shirt on.

YES WE DID!

glitter-graphics.com

OBAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cheney hurt himself picking up boxes, huh? What was he doing? Picking up boxes full of evidence of all his jiggery pokery and throwing them into an incinerator?

Boy, what an exciting day. Ha- I had to laugh earlier when one of the marching bands was going by and I thought, I recognize that song and then I realized it was that "American Boy" song by....well, beats me. I don't know who 99% of the artists out there are.

Even More To Piss Me Off

SC Priest: No Communion For Obama Supporters

Oh yes. Let's talk about destroying lives and committing sins. Let's talk about the MALE priests who go around condemning homosexuality while they are touching little boys. Let's talk about what that does to "innocent beings".

If I have to hear one more person call Obama "pro-abortion", I am going to scream.

If abortion is to ever be outlawed, I say a law be made that every single person who opposes abortion is forced to become foster parents. They can take in all the children that are not able to be raised. They will also be required to pay for the years of therapy that a rape or incest victim will have to go through when they are forced to carry a child. They will be given a higher tax rate to pay for the prenatal care of an uninsured woman. Every single time a woman dies due to a deadly pregnancy, each and every one of the anti-abortion people will be penalized for allowing an innocent living, breathing person to die. They will also be taxed even more to keep the economy going; they want the world to be overpopulated, they can pay for it.

What do these idiot morons not understand when it comes to the health of a woman? If the baby is posing a threat to the mother, that means the mother cannot provide the baby properly as well. So instead of aborting the baby and allowing the mother to live, do these morons not realize that by allowing no abortion that two people could very well die instead of just one?

I often wonder what a radical Bible-thumping holier than thou Christian would do if there was a way to find out before it is born that their child is going to grow up homosexual.

I mean, homosexuality is such a sin and all....

Rudolph With Your Nose So Bright

Won't you guide my sleigh tonight?

I heard "Rudolph" the other night and I thought, you know, this election is a lot like that story. The other reindeer ripped Rudolph apart and then as soon as they found out he could help them, then suddenly they were his best friend. Plenty of GOPers and Democrats ripped Obama to shreds- personally, none the less- but now that he won, now all of a sudden they support him 100%.

Speaking of which:

"And then, of course, in the world of the blogosphere where so much is based on...where they allow for a hard news source...again, like you're suggesting, from an anonymous blog somewhere...some kid in his pajamas sitting in his parent's basement down on his computer gossipin' or just what's being typed in a blog and then they use that as a hard news source. That does not bode well for the state of journalism today."

Sarah, that is not the description of bloggers. That is the description of computer virus creators.

Boy, for someone who hates the media so much, she certainly is using them for all it's worth.

More Good News, Everyone!

Robert F. Kennedy: Environmental Protection Agency Head?

Oh, Obama, please pick him! This will really make my week! I am in the middle of Crimes Against Nature and I think he would really do a good job. I don't get why on review sites a lot of people think he rants too much in the book; I guess as someone who rants a lot as well wouldn't see it. To be honest, I have never been much of an environmentalist. I am not an anti-environmentalist, far from it, but I have never been one to chain myself to trees or anything like that. But the stuff I am reading that the Bush Administration is allowing to happen is depressing. I suspect Cheney has more to do with it than Bush.

God! I still cannot believe he won! It still hasn't sunk in. Call me sadistic, but I never felt so much pleasure looking through the Huffington Post's slideshow of McCain supporters after the election was called. Now they know how we have felt the past 2 elections, although the big difference is, we won the election fair and square. We won by not behaving extremely dirty (frankly, I don't even see where Obama EVER played "dirty"). We won by not suppressing voters.

In the last weeks of the election, I worried about a few things- 1. an extremely damaging October surprise, 2. election stealing and 3. a possible Bradley effect (I was starting to worry that the constant talking of it would make people actually start to bring on a Bradley effect; you know how gullable the population is; they hear something and then start to mimic it, like when some idiot decides to shoot up a school, then for the next few weeks, you end up with multiple copycats). Back after the Republican Convention, I was depressed as hell. I kept thinking, we are going to lose this. Again. People are going to vote for someone because they think with their dicks, neverminding the fact that McCain is the candidate.

Most McCain supporters are some of the most hateful people I have ever been acquainted with. It astonishes me, especially with the ones that call themselves good Christians. McCain mentions his name and the crowd boos last night. Did you hear any booing when Obama mentioned McCain? No. What McCain supporters think will become of this country is absurd. Like we really want the religious right pushing their backwards ass ways on us. I don't know what Americans want from a president. Grow up. They're never going to do everything you want. I may be a Democrat, but I do not support illegal immigration. Do any of my candidates feel the same way? No, but it's less I disagree with than with most Republican candidates. Tell me again what Bush has done to stop illegal immigration. Because I don't know about any of you, but all I see in the state of NJ is illegal immigrants. And not ones that want to work.

What makes me laugh the most is when college students cry about socialism and Obama. A present college student making $250,000 a year? Get real. What's the matter? Are you mad that Mommy and Daddy won't be able to spoil you as much? Darn. I guess you'll have to learn responsibility.

Back before I watched NASCAR, I was one of those people who believed the stereotype of dumb redneck, racist Republican hillbillies being their base crowd. When I started to watch it, I dismissed the stereotype. Then, as I got more into and met fans on their community, I realized just how much the stereotype rings true. And my NASCAR friends on Myspace just further proved my point.

Hot Friggin DOG! YES WE COULD!

We won! Someone I voted for actually won!

(well, actually I voted for- please don't throw anything at me, fellow NJ residents- Corzine, but that doesn't count.)

I am so fucking relieved. I am so relieved I never have to hear about Joe the Plumber again or hear that horrible banshee screech anymore. My uterus is relieved that for the next 4 years I can still make a choice.

I am also glad to see that Lautenberg and Adler won as well. They were the only other 2 I voted for. Call me a bad voter, but I didn't bother voting for any other NJ candidate because frankly, my town is going to blow no matter who runs it. It will continue to be a town with no sidewalks or stores in walkable distance. It will continue to be a town that refuses to build moderate income housing and that responds to criticism with "if you people can't afford to live in our town, then you'll just have to leave". It will continue to be a town that protests low income housing because of violence and drugs, while protesting it with violence and while the same bastards that protest it have spoiled rotten bastard children that get drunk and high every weekend. It will continue to be a town that builds and builds and builds, causing schools to be overcrowded, leading to more schools being built, so then they can build even more houses and bringing the circle back around again. Do I dislike it here? You have no idea.

Anyway, I thought McCain's speech was good and I liked that he silenced his supporters when they booed Obama. That, to me, seemed like the McCain people always talk about. I didn't even know who McCain was until this year. It almost makes me feel a little sorry for him because he does seem like a really nice guy. He just acted horrible, though. He ran such a dirty campaign, although I suspect that four-eyed Alaskan bitch had more to do with the dirtiness of the campaign than McCain.

Now, I could receive a lot of slack for this, but to show what a good guy he is, I think Obama should offer McCain a position on his cabinet. McCain doesn't have to accept it, but it can at least show that Obama can "reach across the aisle".

Now, please, Obama, do not make me regret voting for you! Please do not make me, and millions of others, have to apologize for voting for you!

One more thing- what do they do since Biden won the Senate seat in Delaware?

The Wrath Of McCain

I never minded John McCain much in the beginning. I mean, I didn't want him, that was for certain. When he chose Sarah Palin, I got all but 5 minutes to give her a chance. Frankly, I am still trying to find what was so great about her convention speech that people just absolutely rave about and I think I may be searching a long time for an answer. All I heard was a bunch of Obama slamming and praising of herself and nothing about what the McCain Administration would do for the country. I thought less of John McCain, but after watching the debates, I can finally see why people say he is truly a scary man that should not be anywhere near the White House.

I am referring to his temper, of course. As someone with a pretty explosive temper, I know I certainly would not want me to be near the WH. I would be a president who if a foreign leader even so much as gave me a dirty look, I would be declaring war. If someone as mild as Obama could get under McCain's skin the way he does, can you imagine McCain talking with Middle Eastern or Russian leaders? We would probably be in a hundred different wars.

I keep thinking about the idiots who scream "kill him!" and "off with his head!" (what is this? fucking Alice in Wonderland?) and I have to wonder if these blockheads ever think of Obama's children when they are screaming this? Just take a minute and picture yourself one of the girl's ages and hearing people screaming "kill him!" about your father. Pretty upsetting, isn't it?

I am going to leave you with a message from Lady Miss Kier: