Random Thoughts

Wow, I cannot believe it will already be one week since Sandy hit. I spent all last weekend with my stomach in knots over that bitch hitting. And I hate when my family is like, see, you got yourself all worked up for nothing. I am well aware of that. But it is not going to stop me from worrying.

It was a long ass day today. Nice, but long. It was Apple Festival up at Peddler's Village, and as you know by now, I always go to that. It was a nice chilly day for once. A little too windy, but whatever. It still ended up being a nice day. I am just hurting from all of the walking, since I didn't exactly wear the best of shoes. And I am also hurting internally from all of the bad food. Going to Friday's for dinner didn't help. That was an adventure in itself. First, the waitress spilled our drinks all over the table and floor. My order got screwed up. How you screw up a bacon cheeseburger is beyond me, especially when the waitress had the order written down correctly. The manager ended up deducting our drinks and then giving us 40% off of the bill. I felt bad for the waitress. I would have cried if that happened to me. And then died of embarrassment. She still ended up getting a 20% tip on the original cost of the bill, though.

All of this Christmas stuff in stores is depressing me big time. Everywhere I go, it's out. Music Choice is playing Christmas music already on the Sounds of the Season station. I am not looking forward to the holidays. Or my birthday. God help me next year when I turn 30. And go figure- I am complaining about Christmas while listening to "What Child Is This?" by the Moody Blues.

Sunday is that Italian shin-ding that I have been going to for the past 2 years. I am honestly not really looking forward to it. My stomach is not in the mood for another day of bad eating. Bad eating Saturday, we went to Cracker Barrel on Wednesday, now this. Ugh.

There is something I have been expecting to eventually happen in the future and recently I started to feel that I would be okay with it if it happens. But I saw something last night that made me realize that I still would not be okay. It would still hurt pretty bad. And it is disappointing to realize that. And disappointing that I would let it bother me. It's my fault for having low self-esteem. And also for putting people too high up on a pedestal. I wish I would stop doing that, especially since I am so quick to knock them off.