Random Thoughts

Man, someone really jammed the stick up my ass up further today. I am in a horrid mood and I don't even really know why, aside from the fact that it's back to work tomorrow and my manager comes back this week from vacation. Ugh. And I would bitch about what my FWA did on Friday, but I think I am in a bad enough mood. I am generally not a physically aggressive person but I want nothing more than to punch her in the face.

Back when I was unemployed, I couldn't stand being home and all I wanted to do was be back in the working world. Now I am back in the working world and I am so damn homesick. There is never any pleasing me. Ever. I always want the opposite of what I have.

I finally got to go down Ocean City yesterday. It was a nice day. Overcast, but nice. Pretty sure that is how it was the last time I went to Wildwood as well. It also happened to be surfing competition weekend. I was pretty stoked when I found that out, but I didn't see any surfers except 2 young boys there were nowhere even close to legal and surfers in the ocean. I was on the boardwalk so not close enough to see any hotness. I was quite disappointed.

Last night I had a nightmare about severe weather. All I remember is it was supposed to hit overnight, my county had a TOR:CON of 8, and it was terrifying.

I am absolutely terrified I am going to jinx myself saying this but it seems like 99% of the irritation, irritability, and bladder spazzing is gone. I really hope it does not come back, although I am still concerned why I had it. Unless my last period really threw something off. My bladder felt slightly irritable yesterday and this morning, but it cleared up quickly. I was a little anxious yesterday because of the bleeding on Friday and then on the way down to OC, I started to feel hot. The early menopause fear isn't as strong as it was the past 2 weeks, but I still can't shake it off.

And if it comes back tonight- I am going to look at bananas suspiciously. But let's hope it doesn't. I really and truly hope it doesn't, because I don't know what I will do if it does.

And all I know now is my horrid mood is slowly transitioning into a terribly deep depression.