Good God Part 2

I slept pretty bad last night. Come to think of it, I am not sure if I slept at all. I didn't sleep too hot Saturday and Sunday night either. I feel like crap. I laid in bed and cried at 6:15 because I didn't want to get up. I cried the whole time I was on my bike. I finally said it fuck it and took an Ativan before I left for work. I was worried that between the lack of sleep and the Ativan, I would be face-planting my keyboard at some point during the day, but I did okay. I honestly don't think I would have made it through the day if it weren't for the Ativan.

But as usual good things must come to end and sometime after dinner, I started to feel agitated again. Right now I am very anxious and my heart won't stop racing and I am half tempted to get in my car and go to the ER. Why? I don't know. I just want someone to talk to and who can maybe talk some sense into me. I desperately need someone to talk to right now.

I am still having a little bit of blood every time I go to the bathroom and of course I have myself all stressed over how long is that going to occur and I am stressed because I am having nausea again. I am stressed because I have a headache. I am stressed over how stressed and anxious I feel and I am stressed over how I have all of these symptoms worsen or only occur around the middle of my cycle and around the time of my period. I feel like I am about to lose my mind.

I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON IN MY BODY.