40 Of The Most Powerful Photographs Ever Taken
Wow.
Do you know I am surprised is not on there? The photo from 9/11 of the three firemen raising the flag at Ground Zero. I think that is a very powerful picture. Almost every time I see that picture, I am overwhelmed with emotion.
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
Random Thoughts
You know, I know my mind tends to worry over ridiculous things, but lately, it seems like it is getting even more ridiculous. I received a letter from unemployment informing me I have to report to what will more than likely turn out to be another worthless seminar next week. I am annoyed, because every time I am scheduled for these, I hope that maybe I will get some kind of worthwhile information out of them. But do you know what has me the most annoyed? It's scheduled at 1:00PM and I always eat lunch at 1:30PM.
Last night, when I was trying to fall asleep, I think I spent about 40 minutes or more worrying about how I am going to work eating out lunch while I am on vacation and what I will be able to take. Who worries about this stuff?! This dumbass, that's who!
I have to return books to the library this week. I am stressing over that. Don't know why. I am stressing over vacation. I am stressing over the long ass drive, how much weight I am going to gain, how many meals I am going to get screwed over at*, how hot it is going to be, whether I am going to experience any orthostatic hypotension spells, what if I faint....I could go on forever.
*my sister and her husband have a tendency to be tightwads about meal bills; they will only pay what they owe unless they benefit from splitting the bill. I am a very cheap eater and I never benefit from splitting a bill. Now don't get me wrong, I generally don't mind splitting the bill, especially with my parents. But when it comes to my sister, that is a whole other story.
I've been all over the place before with my emotions, but this is getting ridiculous. I feel like my emotions are being pulled in a million directions, I can't even function properly anymore. Almost every night, I get irritated with my mother and wish she would go to bed sooner so I can be myself, only to find that when she does I am depressed being up by myself. She keeps irritating me so much and at the same time, I want to scream because I know one day I am not going to have her around and I don't know how I will deal when that day comes. I can't even deal with the thought of it. And it's the same thing with all of my loved ones, but more my mother than anything.
When we were driving down the shore, "Siberian Breaks" came up on my iPod right about when we were close to Wildwood and I was already kind of emotional and overwhelmed from my sister throwing a fit at me, and when it got to 4:55, I was so overcome with emotion, it was ridiculous, and all I could think was, "I want to be dead; I don't want to deal with this shit anymore. It's never going to get better and I wish everyone would just stop bullshitting me".
I don't know how much more of this emotional rollercoaster I can deal with. I wish one person, just one, would convince me with a good enough reason of why it's all worth it.
A thought occured to me earlier- I wonder how would an artist feel if they were told a song of theirs meant the difference between life and death to someone? That by listening to that particular song, it kept the person from harming themselves? Would they be freaked out? I think I would be touched (and I would probably get very emotional that I was able to help someone).
Hm. Too bad I will probably never get the chance to tell any artists that their music has kept me from doing something stupid too many times to count.
Last night, when I was trying to fall asleep, I think I spent about 40 minutes or more worrying about how I am going to work eating out lunch while I am on vacation and what I will be able to take. Who worries about this stuff?! This dumbass, that's who!
I have to return books to the library this week. I am stressing over that. Don't know why. I am stressing over vacation. I am stressing over the long ass drive, how much weight I am going to gain, how many meals I am going to get screwed over at*, how hot it is going to be, whether I am going to experience any orthostatic hypotension spells, what if I faint....I could go on forever.
*my sister and her husband have a tendency to be tightwads about meal bills; they will only pay what they owe unless they benefit from splitting the bill. I am a very cheap eater and I never benefit from splitting a bill. Now don't get me wrong, I generally don't mind splitting the bill, especially with my parents. But when it comes to my sister, that is a whole other story.
I've been all over the place before with my emotions, but this is getting ridiculous. I feel like my emotions are being pulled in a million directions, I can't even function properly anymore. Almost every night, I get irritated with my mother and wish she would go to bed sooner so I can be myself, only to find that when she does I am depressed being up by myself. She keeps irritating me so much and at the same time, I want to scream because I know one day I am not going to have her around and I don't know how I will deal when that day comes. I can't even deal with the thought of it. And it's the same thing with all of my loved ones, but more my mother than anything.
When we were driving down the shore, "Siberian Breaks" came up on my iPod right about when we were close to Wildwood and I was already kind of emotional and overwhelmed from my sister throwing a fit at me, and when it got to 4:55, I was so overcome with emotion, it was ridiculous, and all I could think was, "I want to be dead; I don't want to deal with this shit anymore. It's never going to get better and I wish everyone would just stop bullshitting me".
I don't know how much more of this emotional rollercoaster I can deal with. I wish one person, just one, would convince me with a good enough reason of why it's all worth it.
A thought occured to me earlier- I wonder how would an artist feel if they were told a song of theirs meant the difference between life and death to someone? That by listening to that particular song, it kept the person from harming themselves? Would they be freaked out? I think I would be touched (and I would probably get very emotional that I was able to help someone).
Hm. Too bad I will probably never get the chance to tell any artists that their music has kept me from doing something stupid too many times to count.
Monday, May 28, 2012
Video Of The Day
I keep hearing this song on Music Choice Alternative. I sang it to the dog the last time I heard it. What? It's so damn catchy.
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Random Thoughts
I hope everyone's Memorial Day weekend is going well. Spending it with family. Unlike me.
Yesterday had the potential to be a really great day. Until my sister had to throw a hissy fit over the fact that I had on the top she wanted to wear because she was having a fat day and it was the only thing she was comfortable in, and I refused to change. I had it on first. And the princess couldn't get her way, so she threw a fit. I wasn't dealing with her attitude, so I walked out of her house. My mom came storming out a few minutes later (you know my sister was being ridiculous when even my mom was taking my side in this). Eventually she came out (probably after bad-mouthing us to all holy hell to her husband) and we went down the shore for the day.
Then some of the bullshit I had to listen to when we were on the boardwalk from her.....I don't think I have ever wanted to knock my sister on her ass as much as I want to right now. I have been so aggravated and I am still grinding my teeth, because I am itching to get into a massive fight with her. First she was telling me about a coworker who was in a wedding, and apparently the bridesmaids all put together and paid for the bride to have her hair and make-up done. My sister made some comment to her co-worker that oh that must have been nice (sarcastically), because her bridesmaid didn't do anything like that for her. She claims the dig wasn't at me, but rather at the other two, particularly the one who has been in a wedding before and had her own. You know what? I cannot find anything that says the bridesmaids have to do that.
She made some other snide comments about the wedding, but claims none of them were directed at me. But then she had to go and make some dig at me that she was worried I was going to be a bitch at the bachelorette party and the day of the wedding. Why any of this is coming up over a year later, I don't even understand. Especially since she got into a fight with one of the bridesmaids (the drunk obnoxious one) and got upset when the bridesmaid threw something about the wedding back in her face.
While we are speaking of the wedding, that reminds me of how she behaved at her bridal shower. She was pissed because she was sick and feeling really lousy. And then did nothing but bitch about how the shower was run. Right. Because we knew when we booked the shower back in the early fall that she was going to get sick that particular weekend in Ferbruary.
But the one that pissed me off the most- especially because I really wanted to lay into her about it, but I couldn't start a fight in the middle of the boardwalk- was when she was complaining about my grandparents not giving her a first anniversary card. Which yeah, I agree is really out of the ordinary for them. But then she says that she really hopes they are planning on giving her money towards her new house, because after all her grandmother-in-law is giving them money. I was stunned. I wanted to turn to her and say, "EXCUSE ME? You expect our grandparents who live in a very fixed income to just give you money?! Who the fuck do you think you are?! "
Apparently I am just itching to get into a fight with anyone today, because I almost started one with my mother earlier over not inviting my grandparents over. But my sister is more the one I want to go after than anything. My sister has always had the princess mentality, but boy is she getting worse. I just cannot believe the gall of her to expect our grandparents to give her money. Her grandmother-in-law has money. My grandparents do not. And I am so angry at her (and even madder that I could not start a fight with her) that if she comes over and says one wrong thing, I am going to absolutely blow. I am not in the mood for her (or anyone's, really) shit today.
You know it's bad when I broke down crying in the bathroom earlier because I wish I had medical so I could go to the hospital. I am not particularly thinking of harming myself (just the general I wish I could kill myself, but I have no plan) but I need to get away for at least a week.
Yesterday had the potential to be a really great day. Until my sister had to throw a hissy fit over the fact that I had on the top she wanted to wear because she was having a fat day and it was the only thing she was comfortable in, and I refused to change. I had it on first. And the princess couldn't get her way, so she threw a fit. I wasn't dealing with her attitude, so I walked out of her house. My mom came storming out a few minutes later (you know my sister was being ridiculous when even my mom was taking my side in this). Eventually she came out (probably after bad-mouthing us to all holy hell to her husband) and we went down the shore for the day.
Then some of the bullshit I had to listen to when we were on the boardwalk from her.....I don't think I have ever wanted to knock my sister on her ass as much as I want to right now. I have been so aggravated and I am still grinding my teeth, because I am itching to get into a massive fight with her. First she was telling me about a coworker who was in a wedding, and apparently the bridesmaids all put together and paid for the bride to have her hair and make-up done. My sister made some comment to her co-worker that oh that must have been nice (sarcastically), because her bridesmaid didn't do anything like that for her. She claims the dig wasn't at me, but rather at the other two, particularly the one who has been in a wedding before and had her own. You know what? I cannot find anything that says the bridesmaids have to do that.
She made some other snide comments about the wedding, but claims none of them were directed at me. But then she had to go and make some dig at me that she was worried I was going to be a bitch at the bachelorette party and the day of the wedding. Why any of this is coming up over a year later, I don't even understand. Especially since she got into a fight with one of the bridesmaids (the drunk obnoxious one) and got upset when the bridesmaid threw something about the wedding back in her face.
While we are speaking of the wedding, that reminds me of how she behaved at her bridal shower. She was pissed because she was sick and feeling really lousy. And then did nothing but bitch about how the shower was run. Right. Because we knew when we booked the shower back in the early fall that she was going to get sick that particular weekend in Ferbruary.
But the one that pissed me off the most- especially because I really wanted to lay into her about it, but I couldn't start a fight in the middle of the boardwalk- was when she was complaining about my grandparents not giving her a first anniversary card. Which yeah, I agree is really out of the ordinary for them. But then she says that she really hopes they are planning on giving her money towards her new house, because after all her grandmother-in-law is giving them money. I was stunned. I wanted to turn to her and say, "EXCUSE ME? You expect our grandparents who live in a very fixed income to just give you money?! Who the fuck do you think you are?! "
Apparently I am just itching to get into a fight with anyone today, because I almost started one with my mother earlier over not inviting my grandparents over. But my sister is more the one I want to go after than anything. My sister has always had the princess mentality, but boy is she getting worse. I just cannot believe the gall of her to expect our grandparents to give her money. Her grandmother-in-law has money. My grandparents do not. And I am so angry at her (and even madder that I could not start a fight with her) that if she comes over and says one wrong thing, I am going to absolutely blow. I am not in the mood for her (or anyone's, really) shit today.
You know it's bad when I broke down crying in the bathroom earlier because I wish I had medical so I could go to the hospital. I am not particularly thinking of harming myself (just the general I wish I could kill myself, but I have no plan) but I need to get away for at least a week.
Bored Anal Retentive Bitch Problems
Cheesus, I am tired beyond belief. Yet I am so wired and aggravated from today (long story; too tired to talk about right now). I am grinding my teeth to all holy hell. I've gone though three [very loud] rounds of "Siberian Breaks" to try and get sleepy and it just isn't happening.
Saturday, May 26, 2012
Random Thoughts
Boy, am I cranky as anything. I don't even know why. I actually woke up in a good mood and have been relatively pleasant all day. And then suddenly, something crawled up my ass. Kind of like that bug that was up Icky Vicki's ass in The Fairly Oddparents.
Man, that was a great show. Before Poof came along, that is.
Actually, I think I got cranky after my sister asked my mother if anyone else was being invited to our itty bitty cookout on Sunday and she said no. Meaning she is not even going to bother inviting my grandparents and aunt. She just lets my father win all the time. And I know, I just know, if anything happens to my grandparents, my mother is going to whine that she is sorry she never said the hell with my father and just invited them. It makes me so damn angry.
It was bad enough that I was never allowed to go anywhere with them when I was little. My father forbidded us to go with them down the shore, or stay over their house, or whatever. And if that didn't make things shitty enough, he told my mother that if anything ever happened to us, he would hold her accountable. This from the same man that didn't even care if he had kids. Who said when my mother found out that she was pregnant with me that he doesn't know if he could love another child as much as my sister. When my mother told me the story about my father saying he would never let her live it down if anything happened to us- in addition to the story that if my mother ever tried to leave him, he would tell a judge that she was an unfit mother- I wanted to punch my father repeatedly in the face. How dare he even THINK of trying to use my sister and me against my mother. And how dare he try to say my mother was an unfit parent.
And then there was a time period where I was finally starting to get to see them more. Up until last year, for some unknown reason. And now it's the same shit all over again. My grandparents are in their 80's. I don't know how much more time I have with them.
And I wonder why I have so many fucking issues?
I-476 reopened late Friday after truck fire | 6abc.com
Frozen french fries? Did they cook in that fire? Why do tractor trailers carrying the funniest things always crash? I heard about a tractor trailer accident a few months ago and obviously the accident itself wasn't funny, but when the news revealed what the cargo was, I think I laughed for about 15 minutes. I can't remember what it was, though. Dammit.
Speaking of tractor trailers, I almost witnessed someone get rear-ended by one on Thursday. Luckily, the truck driver was able to stop in time, although he was smoking all over the place from slamming the brakes so hard. My heart was in my throat, especially since the truck driver swerved into our lane and we were just getting over into the right hand lane. I swear, if I had seen someone get nailed by a tractor trailer, I would never get in a car again.
7-Eleven Opens Thousands Of New Stores, Aims For World Domination
Alright! Who doesn't want world domination?! I like 7-11. You should see the big ass diet Coke I can get for about $1.60. The Double Gulp, I think it's called. It's about 54 oz. I also live in the land of Wawa, which is also awesome, but I can get a bigger soda at 7-11 for a cheaper price.
Man, that was a great show. Before Poof came along, that is.
Actually, I think I got cranky after my sister asked my mother if anyone else was being invited to our itty bitty cookout on Sunday and she said no. Meaning she is not even going to bother inviting my grandparents and aunt. She just lets my father win all the time. And I know, I just know, if anything happens to my grandparents, my mother is going to whine that she is sorry she never said the hell with my father and just invited them. It makes me so damn angry.
It was bad enough that I was never allowed to go anywhere with them when I was little. My father forbidded us to go with them down the shore, or stay over their house, or whatever. And if that didn't make things shitty enough, he told my mother that if anything ever happened to us, he would hold her accountable. This from the same man that didn't even care if he had kids. Who said when my mother found out that she was pregnant with me that he doesn't know if he could love another child as much as my sister. When my mother told me the story about my father saying he would never let her live it down if anything happened to us- in addition to the story that if my mother ever tried to leave him, he would tell a judge that she was an unfit mother- I wanted to punch my father repeatedly in the face. How dare he even THINK of trying to use my sister and me against my mother. And how dare he try to say my mother was an unfit parent.
And then there was a time period where I was finally starting to get to see them more. Up until last year, for some unknown reason. And now it's the same shit all over again. My grandparents are in their 80's. I don't know how much more time I have with them.
And I wonder why I have so many fucking issues?
I-476 reopened late Friday after truck fire | 6abc.com
Frozen french fries? Did they cook in that fire? Why do tractor trailers carrying the funniest things always crash? I heard about a tractor trailer accident a few months ago and obviously the accident itself wasn't funny, but when the news revealed what the cargo was, I think I laughed for about 15 minutes. I can't remember what it was, though. Dammit.
Speaking of tractor trailers, I almost witnessed someone get rear-ended by one on Thursday. Luckily, the truck driver was able to stop in time, although he was smoking all over the place from slamming the brakes so hard. My heart was in my throat, especially since the truck driver swerved into our lane and we were just getting over into the right hand lane. I swear, if I had seen someone get nailed by a tractor trailer, I would never get in a car again.
7-Eleven Opens Thousands Of New Stores, Aims For World Domination
Alright! Who doesn't want world domination?! I like 7-11. You should see the big ass diet Coke I can get for about $1.60. The Double Gulp, I think it's called. It's about 54 oz. I also live in the land of Wawa, which is also awesome, but I can get a bigger soda at 7-11 for a cheaper price.
Labels:
711,
ANGRY,
Diet Coke,
Random Thoughts,
Stupid Drivers,
Wawa
Friday, May 25, 2012
The Headline Of The Day
Cat Divorce: Israeli Man Divorces Wife Over Her 550 Cats
Yikes! Five hundred and fifty cats?! That's not taking "crazy cat lady" to a whole other level. That's taking "crazy cat lady" to whole new freaking universe!
I almost peed myself laughing at this part "they blocked the entrance to the bathroom, swarmed the kitchen, and stalked him at mealtime by stealing his food off the table".
Yikes! Five hundred and fifty cats?! That's not taking "crazy cat lady" to a whole other level. That's taking "crazy cat lady" to whole new freaking universe!
I almost peed myself laughing at this part "they blocked the entrance to the bathroom, swarmed the kitchen, and stalked him at mealtime by stealing his food off the table".
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Bored Anal Retentive Bitch Problems
I swear....if I never have to be unemployed again in my life, it will be absolutely fantastic.
I wish I had an angry dome right about now. Especially after reading this:
So What Has Brad From LFO Been Up To These Days? | Dlisted
STFU, LFO. Not everything that is done at Planned Parenthood is an abortion. But I guess you would not know that, considering you are a man and therefore have no uterus. Go back to screwing your girls (or dudes) that wear Abercrombie & Fitch. Douchebags.
I wish I had an angry dome right about now. Especially after reading this:
So What Has Brad From LFO Been Up To These Days? | Dlisted
STFU, LFO. Not everything that is done at Planned Parenthood is an abortion. But I guess you would not know that, considering you are a man and therefore have no uterus. Go back to screwing your girls (or dudes) that wear Abercrombie & Fitch. Douchebags.
Labels:
Abortion,
Angry Dome,
Bored Anal Retentive Bitch Problems,
LFO
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Random Thoughts
I never seem to remember my dreams much anymore, unless they are incredibly embarrassing or terrifying, but for some reason, while I was in the midst of brushing my teeth, I remembered my dream last night. In my dream, for some bizarre reason, I happened to notice I had a copy of One Direction's CD from the library and it was ridiculously overdue and at first I thought, eh, I'm too lazy to take it back today, but then thought, oh I guess better take it back before the rabid OD fans come after me with pitchforks and torches and burn down my house.
I heard some story earlier on the news about some bitch from NJ (god, just keep embarrassing yourself, NJ; we don't have a bad enough reputation as it is) who is claiming she was fired from her job for being too hot. I almost laughed my ass off at her. Hot? I don't think so. She ugly! She looks like Baby Spice beaten with an ugly stick and then stuck in a tanning booth. And then the news goes on to say that Gloria Allred was representing her or something and....well, I won't even give my opinion on that bitch. She makes me want to shank someone.
Then again, I suppose it must be nice to have that much self-confidence and appreciation of yourself. It must be nice to be able to look in the mirror and like what you see, instead of wanting to smash it with your bare hands and then shoot it with a .45.
I was sitting and thinking last night about how much I want to be in a relationship with someone, but that right now it just is not a possibility. As much as I want to, I would be playing with fire giving my heart to someone. But being alone is breaking my heart. Where do I win in this?
It also occured to me last night that if anyone in my family ever forced me to go to the hospital, that any amount of trust I have left in my body, would be gone. And it does not even matter if admitting me to the hospital would make the difference between life or death. I would never be able to trust my family or anyone ever again.
I heard some story earlier on the news about some bitch from NJ (god, just keep embarrassing yourself, NJ; we don't have a bad enough reputation as it is) who is claiming she was fired from her job for being too hot. I almost laughed my ass off at her. Hot? I don't think so. She ugly! She looks like Baby Spice beaten with an ugly stick and then stuck in a tanning booth. And then the news goes on to say that Gloria Allred was representing her or something and....well, I won't even give my opinion on that bitch. She makes me want to shank someone.
Then again, I suppose it must be nice to have that much self-confidence and appreciation of yourself. It must be nice to be able to look in the mirror and like what you see, instead of wanting to smash it with your bare hands and then shoot it with a .45.
I was sitting and thinking last night about how much I want to be in a relationship with someone, but that right now it just is not a possibility. As much as I want to, I would be playing with fire giving my heart to someone. But being alone is breaking my heart. Where do I win in this?
It also occured to me last night that if anyone in my family ever forced me to go to the hospital, that any amount of trust I have left in my body, would be gone. And it does not even matter if admitting me to the hospital would make the difference between life or death. I would never be able to trust my family or anyone ever again.
Labels:
Dumb Lawsuits,
One Direction,
Random Thoughts,
Stupid People
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
Quote Of The Day
I have American Dad on, and it's the "Rapture's Delight" episode, and more than 5 minutes ago, this line was said, and I am still giggling uncontrollably at it:
Terry: Authorities confirm the total number of Raptured at 142 million. You may notice that my partner Greg isn't here, that's because he was Raptured. Apparently, God does love gays but only if they're 'tops'.
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