Random Thoughts

I'm really starting to get pissed with work now. As far as I last knew, my benefits were being paid through the end of April, then they would make a decision on what to do. May is more than half over and I have still yet to hear from anyone about what's going on with benefits, resumption of work, etc, anything at all. Was I forgotten about or something? It wouldn't be the first time I have been forgotten for things. Hell, there's even been times in work where my manager (supposedly) forgot to include me in meetings. Not even joking.

I mean, I can totally understand how people can forget me if I'm not physically in their presence, because for the most part I am extremely quiet when I'm around people. But then a part of me is like, if I have to remind people I exist, that's problematic. And it shouldn't be my responsibility to remind people I exist.

I know I am reaching the point where I'm taking this being furloughed far too personally now. I've always been taking it personally, but now a lot more than originally. I don't know why I am, but I just am. It's making me feel completely wretched, a loser, more proof that I'm a failure at life, you name it.